Borderline

[T'Prise 0]

Meritorious Achievement Award

 

“Computer, raise lights one level,” T’Prise requested as she stepped into her quarters.

 

A soft, ambient fluorescent glow filled the room, chasing away the shadows and lighting the darkened room. The holowall projected a scenic vista of the Ra’al Province at night, brilliant pinpoints of light dotting its vast open skies and reflecting softly within the shimmering waters of the Varoth Sea. Although decorated somewhat sparsely according to human standards, the walls and shelves were graced by small relics and other pieces of Vulcan art and antiquities, plainly bespeaking the occupant’s cultural heritage. It was obviously an inner sanctum, projecting calm serenity balanced by logic, an outward reflection of the individual who occupied the space.

 

Walking slowly into the room, T’Prise placed her ever-present data PADD, which contained the latest test results on the slipstream emitters, on the desk of the workstation tucked unobtrusively into a corner. On the opposite wall three pillar candles were placed within a slight recess, slowly she moved across the room and knelt to light them, gently blowing out the lighter and placing it on the sill. She paused for a long moment, studying the candles, before standing and silently pacing down the small hallway into the lavatory to change out of her uniform and wash her face. Finished with her ablutions, she removed her hair pins, letting the length uncoil from its tightly bound constraints and fall down, brushing her shoulder blades. A smooth flick of her fingers swept it back behind the points of her ears and out of her face; looking up, she stared at herself in the mirror, trying to assess how well the outwardly projected tranquility concealed the inward turmoil.

 

Something was wrong; it would be illogical to deny that her equilibrium had been disrupted. The wall separating her from her emotions was being slowly eroded away, in a small but insidious manner. Each carefully placed brick was being chipped at until its structural integrity was inconsequential to the overall strength of the edifice. Despite her attempts to shore up these damages through logic and meditation, the wall was still slowly crumbling.

 

It was not difficult to pinpoint the cause of this problem. The accident aboard the Wanderlust had left her vulnerable, her natural defenses weakened. Although her mind meld with Commander Escher had aided in identifying the problem, she often pondered as to whether the meld also left her susceptible to emotional weaknesses. Delaying a trip to Vulcan to consult with specialists about having her suppressed memories brought fully to the surface, in order to reconcile and purge the incident and its associated vestigial emotions, had been a lapse in judgment. Judgment perhaps impaired by the circumstances.

 

The introduction of quantum technology and the implementation of slipstream devices on the Manticore in preparation for their latest mission had served as another catalyst, tearing the bandages from a wound not completely healed. This would certainly explain her odd interactions with her chief as of late; the vulnerabilities exposed were manifesting themselves in unusual behaviors. The actions of the crewmates with whom she interacted with regularly were eliciting curious responses from T’Prise, but she was confident that there was no significance to it. They were merely an outward manifestation of the inner tension resulting from her unresolved issues.

 

Logically, the best course of action would be to discount these eccentricities and focus on their upcoming mission. Ensign Jaxa, the newest alpha shift science team member, displayed the potential to be more than adequate as a member of the team. It would be prudent to cultivate that potential so that Jaxa could serve in an expanded capacity when T’Prise requested temporary leave in order to make the necessary trip to Vulcan.

 

Exhaling gently, she turned from the mirror, prepared to use her carefully cultivated mental discipline as a method of controlling the problem until such a time as she was able to return to Vulcan. Breathing deeply, she centered herself, and moved back into the main room, ready to begin her nightly meditation.

Edited August 19, 2010 by STSF Jami