What Would You Do?

[Vex Xiang 0]

So after buying ID4 (independence day) and watching it a couple times, I got to thinking. What would you really do if suddenly our planet encountered an alien race. Before explaining what I would do personally, there are several things I've learned from ID4 about this situation that I think you'll find helpful...

 

1) Alien weapons, while devistating, are short range. They can only blow up cities if they hover hundreds of feet above it, making them perfect targets for our aircraft. Firing from orbit will not be a consideration.

 

2) When preparing for their attack the aliens will sit on top of the cities for 7 hours, instead of attacking right away, giving plenty of time to evacuate.

 

3) When a mother ship sits in orbit and 15 ships position themselves around the world over all the major cities and don't bother making any contact, a red flag should go up in your head - get the heck out of there! Even if your president tells you to stay indoors.

 

4) If a huge wall of destruction is coming your way and you're trapped in a tunnel, hide in a closet!

 

5) When you and your other 20 pilots with 4 missiles each are attacking the spacecraft, and thousands of small fighters come out of it to get you, do the math, and flee!

 

6) Don't let a stripper lead your little band of survivors. After the aliens blow up the cities, she will decide the best thing to do is to hide out at a military base - surely the aliens would never think of targetting one of those.

 

7) If you can program a virus that will shut down the alien ship's shields, consider doing something more useful - an engine overload or self-destruct might be more efficient.

 

8) Alien dockmasters, like their human counterparts, are often dumb drunks who will let your stray 50 year old ship with metal plates and a big cylinder bolted onto the side dock without question.

 

9) Speaking of which, aliens have spent far too much resources on building short-range city-blasting weapons, and less time on scanners that could detect, say, a nuclear warhead attached to one of their ships.

 

10) Alien bionic suits are just for show - if you meet an alien wearing large bio-mechnical armor, just punch it in the head.

 

11) Anyone can drive right up to the front gate of Area 51. Bonus: if you have an unconcious alien, they'll let you right in.

 

12) The US Government will figure the best way to communicate with the alien visitors is 7 hours after they've positioned themselves over the major cities, and will do so by flashing lights at them in a pretty pattern.

 

13) The president will compare being a leader while aliens are attacking the Earth to flying a jet in the Gulf War. That's right! Its not just presidential candidates who remind us of every little military duty they did.

 

14) Aliens have found the perfect ship design and don't bother upgrading or building different ships in a 50 year timespan.

 

15) When the aliens begin systematically destroying every city on Earth, the President will not understand that it's an invasion until an alien tells him so (a definate possibility if the aliens attack during the Bush administration).

 

16) Aliens have biomechanical suits with 5 tenticles and telepathic capabilities but fly their ships with joysticks.

 

17) When you get lucky and drop the alien's shields, ram a plane into the ships weapon when its about to fire, thus causing an overload that ripples through the ship and destroys it, all the other 19 alien ships will prepare their weapons in the same way to give the attackers the opportunity to destroy them, too. Including the Mbuticluckcluck tribe jumping up and down with spears.

 

18) Based on the ending of this movie I conclude that

A) Aliens feel no need to install even temporary power generators on their fighters.

or ;) When you destroy the saucer ships, all the thousands of alien fighters will suddenly vanish.

or C) When their shields are down, alien fighter pilots panic and become stupid, allowing 3 jets to destroy about 500 of them. The others crash into the ground or self-destruct.

 

19) Celebrate after the saucer ships crash...it is unlikely any of the hundreds of thousands of possible alien crew of those ships survived and are about to storm out of the ship to attack you.

 

20) Learning to pilot alien spacecraft is as easy as learning to pilot jet fighters.

 

 

Okay...so what would I do? Well...I'd have to say that I would get in my car, pack up as much water and food as I could, and drive to the most remote place I could - in the middle of a forest maybe, and wait until the all clear!

[NDak 0]

::bets the Aliens don't know where Lower Sleeth, WV is::

 

 

 

he he he ;)

[Nemesis 0]

I'd call up SuperMoose! With his Antlers of steel!

[Dumbass 0]

Well I would loot and rob the local stores. Heck, that's something I would probably be doing anyway. (Where does Kroells work again?) ;)

[Veloras Itana 0]

I'd be asking where the line forms for the anal probes then find it and sign up everyone I didn't like. THEN I'd pack up and head for the Rockies with a song in my heart.

 

~Itana

 

P.S. Can we say anal probes here?

[Seiben 0]

Hmm, a toughie that, I'd say I'd go loot the Wal-Mrt for food and supplies, the break into a Ferrari dealer, steal a Ferrari and drive on up to Saskatcehwan or somthing, it's not like there's anything worth destroying up there anyways, unless the aleins are into wheat. ;)

Edited May 27, 2004 by Seiben

[Dumbass 0]

break into a Ferrari dealer, steal a Ferrari and drive on up to Saskatcehwan or somthing

Good luck driving a Ferrari in the snow. ;)

[Tovan 0]

I feel paranoid ... ::makes a tinfoil hat and wears it:: THEY're coming for me !!!

[Nemesis 0]

Actually in all honesty, I'd just sit in my house singing the blues...

[Lt. Friebel 0]

I would go to a Firearms dealer and start packing up all the guns and ammunition could handle and wait for the groung war to begin.

[Seiben 0]

Good luck driving a Ferrari in the snow.  ^_^

Yeah, pretty true, eh? I hope they invade in the summer then like the aliens did in Independance Day, otherwise.. well... I'd be roasted wiener schnitzel. ;)

Edited May 27, 2004 by Seiben

[Lt. Friebel 0]

HAHAHA

[AndrewLyon 0]

They start invading, can someone say Russain Black Market & Whiskers?;-) I dunno, buy a few nukes, and see if Aliens eat nukes for breakfast:-D

[NDak 0]

They start invading, can someone say Russain Black Market & Whiskers?;-) I dunno, buy a few nukes, and see if Aliens eat nukes for breakfast:-D

You obviously didn't watch Mars Attacks!

[Travis Kroells 0]

Well I would loot and rob the local stores. Heck, that's something I would probably be doing anyway. (Where does Kroells work again?) ;)

Funny...

 

By the way...

 

Is it wrong if you voted for the hybrid baby thing?

[Nemesis 0]

Funny...

 

By the way...

 

Is it wrong if you voted for the hybrid baby thing?

They could be hot aliens, like the ones in Star Trek...

[Captain Huff 0]

Initially, I'd chance it out in my hick town (as long as we weren't the entry port) and glue myself to CNN. If things started to look bad, I'd do as Vex and load up the car and fly like hell.