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[Cmdr Ayers 0]

       Nick follows the Captain out of the office.  If thoughts could kill, the Station's Commanding Officer would be nothing more then a small pile of ash on the floor.  Nick briefly considers having one of the security guards make sure the Captain's destination in search of food would be limited to his quarters.  Instead Nick keeps his mouth shut, deciding that he really doesn't want to have to explain why.  Besides, right now Nick has no desire to protect the Andorian from himself.

 

       Nick waits until the Captain has left before he says sharply "Lieutenant Shaharin, you're in charge here.  If anything comes up that needs the attention of a senior officer, contact me."  With that, Nick disappears into one of the other turbolifts, intent on returning to the holodeck.  The program he has in mind right now is very much different then the one from earlier.

 

       The turbolift descends a couple decks then slows to a stop.  The doors open and a young Betazoid Science officer takes a step to enter.  The junior Officer's eyes widen in shock and he backpedals.  Nick frowns in some confusion as the doors slide close.  He swears darkly as he realizes what caused that reaction in the other person.  His anger and shock at what the Captain had said had managed to bleed through his shields like the mental and emotional equivalent of a flare.  Nick quickly strengthens his mental shields even as he senses a familiar touch on his mind.

 

       Having seen to the 'comfort' of Dr. Images, Ethan leaves the brig area, intending to return to her desk and complete paperwork.  She has not even the time to sit down, however, before she senses a dark cloud of anger.  Reaching out carefully, she touched his mind gently, confirming what she already sensed--he was mad as hell....  {{Nick? What's wrong, and don't tell me nothing.  I know better than that.}}

 

       As she sent the thought to him, she turned and headed out the door.  "Computer, locate Commander Ayers."  She had a feeling that he would try to downplay what he was feeling, if he didn't attempt to deny it outright.  Perhaps, confronted with her physical presence, he would be more willing to talk.

 

       Nick frowns in concentration {{Ethan, it's not....}}  As he forms the words in his mind, the image of the Betazoid science officer's face floats before Nick's mind's eye.  Sighing, he thinks {{Very well.  I'll meet you at Drankum's unless you have something else in mind.}}

 

       Normally Nick would be reticent to talk about personal problems and concerns.  He had always kept part of himself cloaked in shadows, wary and afraid to discuss the darker aspects of himself.  Still, the Universe always seemed to provide him with a few people he could be more open with, people like his family obviously or certain people he knew from his time on the USS Venture or Starbase 315.  He is grateful to Ethan that she seemed to insist on that role here on Aegis but Nick isn't sure why she did.  It seemed, to him, to be more trouble then it could possibly be worth.  Nick shrugs and makes his way towards Drankum's.

 

       He arrives at Drankum's after a few minutes and after checking for Ethan he has one of the hosts show him towards a table off to the side of the main crowd.  The waiter that shows up a few seconds later tries not to sound disappointed at Nicks' ordering a Chiraltan tea instead of something more expensive.  Unbidden his thoughts turn back to what the Captain had said.  He shakes his head, dismissing the thoughts.  Nick takes a sip of the tea as settles back in the chair to wait. 

 

       His wait isn't long, for Ethan makes her way over to his table a few moments later.   She didn't even need the direction provided by the host, as she is guided far more easily by the dark cloud emanating from Nick's mind.  Absentmindedly, she orders a vanilla milkshake from the hovering waitperson.  There is a slight breeze as the waiter beats a rapid retreat.

 

        Sitting down, she peers at his face, concerned.  She is unsure of what has happened, but it is certain that it had upset him, deeply.  "So, what happened?"

 

       He doesn't answer for a few seconds, taking the time to gather his thoughts and gain some more control over his emotional state.  Finally he sighs "It's nothing that would have really bothered me if it hadn't been such a...rral...messed up and bloody bad week because of the aftermath of the Mogg trial.  And Images' antics haven't exactly helped either.  Unity knows that I wasn't in the best of emotional states before today's little meeting in the observation lounge.  My apologies but I'm afraid that you sensed me overreacting to something the Captain said.  I'll start with that I figured out why the Captain was so..touchy today.  He's in dire need of some rest and my guess would be several pots of strong black coffee, in no particular order.  He's hopefully getting both as we speak.  Lord knows what's going to happen if he doesn't."

 

       He pauses for a few seconds, wondering whether to tell her the next part, not entirely sure how she would take it.  It occurs to him that he'd rather be telling this sort of things to one of his friends from the Venture because at least she wasn't telepathic and as such couldn't pick up on when he was shading the truth.  Briefly the thought that Fiona would have been pleased if the Captain had implied about Fiona and Nick what he had about Ethan and Nick scampers across Nick's mind. 

 

       Before that becomes more of a sour thought, Nick brings himself back to the present.  Nick says quietly "If you want to be told what was exactly said then fine.  Else I'll keep it to the abridged version.  The Captain, because of his condition, made several implications.  Specifically that you and me were late to the meeting because we were in each other's company and that we were in each other's company because we're....more then friends."  He pauses a second then adds "Like I said...an overreaction on my part."

 

       He watches her eyes, wondering how she'll react.

 

       Two major emotions battle with each other in Ethan's mind--worry for Nick and amusement.  Finally, the amusement wins out, and she starts to laugh.  "I'm sorry," she says when she gets control of herself again, "I probably shouldn't be laughing, but it's just so funny.  You know..."  She pauses, not entirely sure how he'll take her next words, 'In a way, we ARE more than friends.  A mere friend probably wouldn't have heard your reaction several decks away.  Now, obviously we aren't *that* kind of more than friends."  {{yet... but interesting idea}} is a quiet thought in her mind, that she doesn't entirely try to shield from him.  "I would worry that the Captain thought that, except that it isn't really any of his business, either way.  What does worry me more is .... you said he needs several pots of coffee?  Are you saying that he's intoxicated?  THAT worries more than any implications about our "lovelife".. or lack thereof."

 

       She hesitates again, then continues, but this time mentally.  {{I almost worry that you care what the Captain thinks of your or our off-duty time. But as you say, you've been under stress.... and I think I might worry more, knowing you, if you really didn't care what your Captain thought of you--on duty or off.}}

 

       He considers her words for a minute before responding mentally {{If he continues with the imbibing it'll be something that I'll have to take care of.  Considering what we all just went through I think a little slack is in order for the moment.  As for us, our..relationship is our business and not the business of anyone else, as you said.  Like I said, I overreacted to what he said because I'm tired, worn out, on edge and my emotional shielding is thin enough to be Swiss cheese.  Considering how many people here think I betrayed them and Mogg and how strong those feelings are in them, I'm a bit surprised that I have any shields left at all right now.  Under a normal situation I would have just dismissed what the Captain said about us out of hand.}}

 

       He takes a sip of his tea as he mulls over a ghost of a thought he picked up from her.  {{And you're right, we're more then just friends.  I don't let just anyone traipse around in my mind and you're most likely the same way.  The risk to our self-identity would be too great otherwise.  As for where we take our relationship in the future, that's the future and it's not written yet.  We're both adults here and as was said earlier..it's our business, not theirs.}}  He nods to the people around them, using the gesture to indicate everyone on the station.  {{To be honest I like having someone I can be open with, and not have to wear the masks and cloaks, figuratively speaking, that I normally wrap myself with.  Though admittedly I haven't gotten quite used to that with you.  Habits are hard to break I suppose.}}  He smiles crookedly, {{Though I'm not sure why you like walking around in my mind.}}  As he "says" that, his subconscious whispers to him "There are depths and darknesses to you that very few people would ever be able to understand."  A thought that he isn't entirely successful at shielding from her.

 

       She smiles kindly, {{There are darknesses in many of us... myself included.  And I'm not even sure we can understand them ourselves.}} Reaching over, she lightly touches his hand, attempting to lend him some assistance in reinforcing his shields.  {{As for the crew, they'll get over it eventually.  Mogg betrayed himself, I think.  I was there.  You did no more or less than your Starfleet oath required.  Loyalty to individuals is fine, but not when it blinds us to their shortcomings.  Our loyalty to our oath has to come first, or we risk turning against what we claim we hold most sacred.}}  She sighs, thinking of all the times that she, while working undercover with SF Security, was involved in the arrest of officers that had violated their oath, and broken the law--all because they believed there was a higher ideal.  {{But it is hard to feel that you betrayed their trust.  That feeling I completely understand--I've felt it many times.}}

 

       Pausing, she takes a drink of her milkshake, just now noticing that it had been delivered.  "This ship coming in... well, I hope it will help redirect the focus of people back to what they are supposed to be doing--give them less time to mull recent events and get themselves all worked up over something that really doesn't involve them."  She smiles before continuing, "I've noticed that it seems to be a human tendency to want to be involved in whatever is going on around them.  And if they can't be, they almost always choose to sit on the sidelines and criticize those that are involved--as if they could make the situation better by doing so.  In their minds, things would never have gotten so out of hand, if only they had been involved in the first place."

 

       "That's one illusion that I hope I've mostly overcome.  Being part Betazoid--a race that doesn't bother to hide their feelings, and can see how those involved truly feel about it.. well, it tends to make one a little less judgmental."  Again, she smiles, studying his face closely, {{You know... I don't think the Captain is the only one that needs rest.  Why don't you go get some yourself.  I'll head up to the CT, and keep an eye on things there.  I can do paperwork there as easily as anywhere.  Don't worry, though, if the station explodes, I'll call you right away.}}

 

       He shakes his head "You're right, the responsibility was to my oath and I realize that.  I just wish that people, Muon and Images especially, would realize that as well.  It's tiring having to maintain my shields to the levels I've had to the last couple days.  And the accusation in their eyes hasn't exactly been pleasant to deal with either.  Granted, I can't read Muon anyways which is a small blessing in all this.  Still, she needs to realize that Starfleet isn't in the revenge business."  He frowns in momentary thought then adds "That I understand and am grateful for far more then most people are probably."

 

       Nick finishes his tea and settles back in his chair.  He squeezes her hand gently as a show of gratitude {{As for your suggestion about my going to get some rest and letting you mind the store in the meantime, I think I'll take you up on that.  Just..just make sure to get some rest yourself sometime before that ship gets here.  I have a feeling we're all going to have to be back on our toes then.}}

 

       He squeezes her hand again before withdrawing the touch as he stands.  He says "Thank you for..."  He shakes his head and shrugs helplessly, not finding the words he was looking for.  He says "Just thank you," before he turns and slips through the crowd on his way to the exit.