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Shadow

Considering Shadow

Considering Shadow
Shadow and Nijil

 

It was strange, this place he was in, wherever it was. Had he discovered a new universe, a place where most energies coalesce into a very compact state, into extremely close bonds? He strained to find the appropriate nomenclature, but what he saw, what he experienced, where he was and everything that surrounded him was so foreign, so bizarre.

 

How it happened was a mystery—as much a mystery as were the inhabitants he encountered. Some inhabitants were biological—a complex mix of energies that moved, manufactured, and communicated in waves and vibrations rather than using the energy waves that emitted from the top of their construction. Other inhabitants were thick, compact, and formed a shell that the biological inhabitants occupied. They had many names for the shell: station, ship, fighter, drone, quarters, home.... They came in different sizes and served different purposes. There must be more shells, he thought, and he wondered if the biological inhabitants could survive without them. He thought not, and he mourned for the energies that formed the shells. They were trapped, doomed to a certain function for the duration of their existence.

He sighed.

Movement came from and moved to everywhere. One particle smashed against another with immense power. Some joined together, broke the other apart, and formed many pieces. It was a perpetual battle in which neither won nor lost. Instead, it changed forms. He saw movement in the elements that formed the shell, and movement in the objects that flowed through it and around it. In some cases, the shell served as a conduit for the particles, but to what purpose? Did that energy have no sense of being? Of presence? Of existence? Did one exist to serve the other until it ceased to exist?

 

Cease to exist. Cease. To exist. If he stayed here, would he cease to exist?

 

His sigh would have echoed in engineering, except that the main shell was vibrating and producing sound that drowned it out.

 

Chaos. Many vibrations. Many discharges of energy. Much destruction, dissipation, and reformation. He often dissipated for survival, but when he re-formed, he was still intact, unchanged. But the immense discharge of power from this large shell—what they called the station—to a smaller shell they called a ship—changed things. It rendered the small shells unusable. Why? What was the purpose?

 

Again he sighed.

 

In the chaos of many vibrations and expulsions of energy, the biological inhabitant closest to him had stopped moving. But its elements were moving. Would it cease to exist? This one that communicated? Would it cease... to... exist?

 

From his shelter around the reactor, Shadow slowly unwrapped to investigate. He dissipated to a thin mist and floated cautiously toward the inhabitant, coming to a stop close enough to watch, and not close enough to disturb. Or frighten. Or make it cease to exist. The biologicals were delicate. Fragile.

 

"Don't worry abo- oof!" Cried the downed engineer-in-charge Nijil as one of his associates tripped over him. Seeing as he was in the way of everyone he pulled himself against a wall. A broken leg was minor compared to other possible injuries, but he wanted to play the role as intended. The wall behind the main console provided a more or less decent view while others worked. Their training allowed them to get the job done without his intervention. Thinking of it, was he really necessary?

 

Jennifer Larson gave him a quick rub on his shoulder as she took command in his absence. He nodded; she nodded. They each knew what to do. Nijil was to sit. He watched as others around him worked, which would give him an opportunity later to evaluate good and bad choices. That was short lived as something caught his eye from a corner. Nijil squinted to block out the overhead lights. "Foggy?"

 

Shadow watched, uncertain of this form’s condition or intent. It splayed against the support element, the element that did not communicate, the one that formed the inner part of the shell. Why did it hug that element? Why did it not move like the others?

 

Nijil checked to see if other engineers saw what he did, but they were too embroiled in their work to notice. He tried to wave the entity over, but like before he had little hope of it not simply dissipating. With a loud whisper as to not arouse others he spoke. "Hey, what are au doing here?"

 

What are au doing here? It was communicating. Vibrating. Wasting energy. Shadow reached out to the place of information for understanding. What is here? Here is… location in space. Intersection of coordinates. Place. Like the place of information. Strange concept.

 

"I'm guessing au won't say either way, or na... positive... negative... bah, binary. This is not the first time I've been quickly dispatched...but at least this is simulated."

 

Within a nanosecond, Shadow materialized by the inhabitant’s side and took a form that vaguely resembled it. “Here,” he said, without moving his awkwardly formed lips. Then he struggled to produce a vibration. “Cease… to… exist?” Still, his lips did not move.

 

"What?" Asked Nijil, looking puzzled. "Oh me? Not today, though if the simulation called me deceased I'd practice the eternal sleep in my own quarters. Oh no. My daughter is getting a musical instrument. Scratch that." He looked directly at the formed mist. "I thought we lost you. How are you doing?"

 

“Here,” he said again, puzzled. “Sim….” He stopped. Vibrating to form words took much energy. Waste of energy. He began to fade. Use place of information. “Sim...ula...tion. Imm..itate. Fake?”

 

"Not easy for you, this speaking form of communication. I don't blame you." He thought progress was being made. "Yes, fake, but on purpose. Training. Lesson. Practice." Perhaps breaking up thoughts into their meaning would help.

 

“Why?” The upswing of inflection took even more energy. “Waste energy.”

 

"To learn, improve, so we know what to do when this is real. Glad you are asking questions"

 

“Words… fake… energy… waste....” Shadow was fading into the bulkhead with the strain.

 

"Be that as it may, here we are. Hey, don't go." Nijil reached out for the fog like he would towards Annisha and brushed him only slightly just before the fog dissipated. The touch ricocheted across his skin, up and down his legs and to his extremities. "Fvadt! Ugh." He shook violently, but more like a twitching eye. He felt it more than performed it for all to see. His eyes opened wide as his head jerked up. He stared at the lights above as the impulses carried across his body. Muscles contracted one moment and relaxed the next.

 

"Ah..."

 

Things were looking up. One pain was replaced by some kind of burning sensation he hoped was not real.

 

"Oh..."

 

He may, or may not have regretted drinking so much coffee that morning.

 

"Ugh..."

 

The oscillations were subsiding as was the pain, but he could not tell as his senses were mixed up like a Ferengi trying to argue logic with a Klingon. Nothing made any sense. Clarity replaced by pain. Nijil let out a sigh as his body finally gave out and his mind shut down to protect itself, once again. His body rested as though he was sleeping on a bed of rocks.

 

When he regained consciousness, a soft voice spoke from the void. “No…. touch.”

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Shadow! woOt!

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Shadow! woOt!

 

He's baaaack.....

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