Nem and Images joint log

[Nemesis 0]

[email protected] says:

 

::holding a padd as he walks into sickbay:: Hello Midshipman Nem

 

[email protected] says:

 

Have you come for your session?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

yes sir

 

[email protected] says:

 

In sickbay, "doctor" is better :miles:: please sit ::gestures to a chair::

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

yes sir... I mean doctor :: smiles and sits down::

 

[email protected] says:

 

:its opposite and looks at PADD, puts it down:: So what seems to be the problem Nem? how do you feel?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

well I have been having well...memories of my past that are not pleasent

 

[email protected] says:

 

I see...are these past memories to do with the bajoran occupation?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

yes they are ::gets a stern face::

 

[email protected] says:

 

Please, relax. Describe these memories of yours, do they occur in dreams? Or whilst you are awake?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

well they are of my parents ::ears begin to water:: they well happen when I am asleep

 

[email protected] says:

 

::feels a twinge relating to his own nightmares:: It's alright, you can tell me about it. What happens in your dream?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

well I am back in the work camps

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

I am brought to a room where my parents are sitting on metal chairs with blood on their faces

 

[email protected] says:

 

I know it's hard, continue

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

well a large Cardassian is holding he so I can't get to them

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

::wipes a tear as it rolls downs cheek::

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

the other ::takes a deep breath:: Cardassians are laughing

 

[email protected] says:

 

::gets a box of tissues off the desk, hands them to nem::

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

::takes a tissue::

 

[email protected] says:

 

Is there any more?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

yes there is ::takes another deep breath::

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

they all had small daggers

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

and they....they......they...well ::fighting tears::

 

[email protected] says:

 

get it out, you'll feel better

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

slit my parents throats slowly and appeared to take pleasure in it as my parents were ::breaks out in a barage of tears::

 

[email protected] says:

 

How old were you when this happened?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

:ut of the tears:: 14

 

[email protected] says:

 

You couldn't do anything about it Nem, they were trained Cardassian troops. You were just a boy. You couldn't save them no matter what you did.

 

[email protected] says:

 

If you even tried they would probably have killed you too

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

I'm not finished doctor

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

there's more

 

[email protected] says:

 

I am sorry, are you sure you can go on?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

::taking a deep breath:: I am sure

 

[email protected] says:

 

i don't want to force anything out of you that isn't ready to be revealed. if you ever feel like you want to stop, tell me. But if you're sure it's all right, tell me what happened next

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

well I got out of the Cardassian's grasp and stole his phaser that was at his belt and killed each of the Cardassians with it

 

[email protected] says:

 

how did it feel to kill them Nem?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

the sad part was that I took pleasure in it I made myself as bad as them

 

[email protected] says:

 

No you didn't. You did what any person would do if they had the chance. But i'm feeling that when you did it you felt a pang of emptiness, like it was too little too late.

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

yes I couldn't have done it sooner I had seen the knives why could I have done it then

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

*couldn't

 

[email protected] says:

 

The fact alone that you managed to avenge your parents is astounding Nem.

 

[email protected] says:

 

Most would wither away and hide but you fought

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

I was blinded with rage I didn't know what I was doing

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

I never felt like this until I came here I feel empty now ever since I got here

 

[email protected] says:

 

You feel empty because since you came here you feel you lack a way to fight. You have spent your whole life fighting since that day

 

[email protected] says:

 

joining resistances, planning bombings against targets

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

I don't think it is that the academy gave me no problems

 

[email protected] says:

 

Why did you join starfleet Nem?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

well to give my brother and sister a better life

 

[email protected] says:

 

How old are they?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

my sister 18 and my brother is 13

 

[email protected] says:

 

Were they ever involved in the shakaar?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

oh of course not I would never let them face that

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

I had them well hidden in a safe house

 

[email protected] says:

 

Why didn't you let them be a part of it? You did. why not them?

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

I didn't want them to face the pain like I did of violence

 

[email protected] says:

 

I think there's something else. You said you enjoyed those cardassian deaths Nem. But i know death. And it doesn't quench a thirst for vengeance, it keeps it going.

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

I am past that I forgave the Cardassians

 

[email protected] says:

 

They killed your parents Nem. They enslaved your people. They made you work in an ungodly place. You may have forgiven the cardassians but you haven't forgiven yourself

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

I do not understand

 

[email protected] says:

 

You want to try to fight for something. That's why you joined starfleet, that's why you became a security officer.

 

[email protected] says:

 

You couldn't save your parents Nem so you've spend your life trying to save someone else.

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

really?

 

[email protected] says:

 

Do you want to know how i know this? Because it happened to me. My parents died in front of me and i couldn't do a damn thhing! a damn thing ::a tear swells in his eye and he realises he's shouting:: i'm sorry. I think we should continue this another time

 

[email protected] says:

 

I'm in no state to offer help.

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

certainly thank you for you help

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

:stands up::

 

[email protected] says:

 

I haven't helped, it's your first session, and i've just shouted at you Nem, i am so sorry. Please talk

 

[email protected] says:

 

to dr. sheepy

 

[email protected] says:

 

for an appointment with him next time

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

:: looks strangely at images:: if you think it best

 

[email protected] says:

 

I do. ::stands up shakes Nem's hand::

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

::returns the handshake::

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

well I think I should take my leave and thanks again doctor

 

[email protected] says:

 

Midshipman, ::nods farewell::

 

=/\=...Mid_Nem...=/\= says:

 

::nods back and leaves sickbay::