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Annabelle O'Halloran

A Burden of Command

Lt. Will Tomlinson sat at the table in their quarters; he'd turned his back on the glowing computer screen still open on the desk behind him. Looking out into the vastness of space, Will Tomlinson was brooding. The overall mission was a success, though the squadron had lost a good pilot. He just sat back and let the stars go by as he contemplated the infinite.

 

Anna stepped off the turbolift and immediately turned left, her step quickening as she approached their quarters. Reaent's simple mission to deliver supplies to Corianis had been anything but. It had been successful, in so far as the supplies were no longer on board, but the sad fact of the matter was that all of the prison staff had been dead before Reaent had even gotten within hailing distance. The past few hours had been spent securing the prisoners and restoring the systems damaged when a meteor had struck the facility, putting in motion the entire tragic chain of events.

 

The cost of retaking the prison hadn't been light, Anna was thinking as she reached their quarters, automatically pausing for a moment as the sensor read her biopattern before activating the door mechanism. One of Reaent’s pilots had been killed by the prison's automatic weapons systems. The comm traffic had been a little confusing to listen to and for a brief moment she'd thought it might have been--

 

"Will." She said softly, coming to a sudden stop next to their dining table, realizing she'd almost walked past him. The only light on in their quarters was spilling out from the bedroom and he was sitting so still... She was bending down, reaching to wrap her arms around him, intending to pull him back against her but she hesitated, something about his utter lack of movement causing her to pull back so that she settled instead for just resting her hands on his shoulders and giving them a gentle squeeze. "I'm so glad you're back," she said quietly, knowing the words couldn't begin to convey how it felt to know he was safe.

 

Turning, Will smiled slightly and squeezed one of her hands with his. "Yeah I'm back. I was just..." His smile faded a bit as looking past her, he realized that the computer was still on. "...finishing up some paperwork.” His tone sounding mildly depressed as he added, "Everything go alright on your end with the SNAFU of a supply run?"

 

Anna managed a half-smile, automatically tightening her fingers around his while replying, "We've determined it was a meteor hitting and disabling the prison shields that was probably responsible for..." Her voice trailed off as following his gaze, she finally noticed what was up on the workscreen. It was a letter -- clearly only half-finished -- to the parents of Lt. James Avery. Jim Avery had been the pilot killed in the raid.

 

"Will, I am so sorry," she said gently, sinking down into the seat next to him while still keeping hold of his hand.

 

Will shrugged slightly. "The life of a fighter pilot." He looked into Anna's eyes and smiled a little before pulling her hand up to his lips and kissing it gently. "You know, sometimes when Dad came home from his missions, I could hear him and Mom talk about people he'd lost. It always seemed to hurt when he came home like that. I guess I can understand why now." He looked at the screen, quiet for a moment before saying, "He loved playing tridimensional chess. I don't think anyone in the squadron could beat him at it." Will frowned again, his sadness apparent as he continued, "Did you know he invented a series of moves we all called the Avery Gambit? Completely brilliant." He rubbed his forehead, looking from Anna back to the computer. "I've been staring at this screen for over two hours and I can't find the words to write to his parents. They just won't come..."

 

Still chilled from the casual offhandedness of his 'just the life of a fighter pilot' remark, Anna bit back the angry words born of worry that wanted to come pouring out, knowing full well how selfish and completely inappropriate they were to the situation Will was facing. He needed her comfort and understanding right now; he was already too well acquainted with her worries for his safety.

 

"They shouldn't come easily, hon," she began softly, her gaze on his profile as he stared at the screen. "Jim Avery will be missed terribly by you and everyone else he worked with. You..." Anna paused, swallowing thickly before continuing, "...routinely risk your lives together but his death was anything but routine. He died doing what he loved." What you all love so much, she thought. "And maybe that's something his family should know."

 

Will thought about what she’d just said. "You're right. And he did die for a reason. His death did have meaning." He looked down and sighed, "I hope knowing that will bring some small comfort to his family." He looked back to Anna again. "Why don't you fix dinner while I finish this, ok?"

 

Anna couldn't remember when she'd felt less like eating dinner and knew nothing would bring her any comfort if Will was killed but pulling dinner together for him would give her something to do. "Ok," she agreed, giving his fingers a final squeeze before reluctantly standing and moving away from him.

 

All Will could do each mission was trust that his skill and instincts would see him through and get him back to his beautiful Anna. Though neither one of them was really in the mood for a meal, he knew it would distract her long enough for him to get this letter finished. Once that was done, all he wanted to do was hold Anna close and revel in the fact that he was still alive. He knew of the phenomena called survivor's guilt but he refused to feel guilty about the fact that he had survived today and that he was right where he wanted to be...close to the woman he loved.

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