More Than a Little Concerned

[Annabelle O'Halloran 0]

Caroline gave Deb a quiet nod as she followed Anna out of the CMO’s office. The ultimate decision they’d come to -- to allow Anna to continue her research on her bracelet’s qualities, with increased regular observation in light of her behavior planetside -- had definitely satisfied neither of the two medical officers. But though Caroline felt increasingly concerned by the reports of others that Anna was exhibiting odd behavior, the CSCI’s insistence that nothing was wrong remained strident, and with her work still as solid as ever, observation was the most they could do for the moment, watching and waiting until they were sure what was going on.

 

“Shift is almost over. Do you want to get something to eat?” she asked Anna noncommittally, taking a few quick steps to catch up with her friend, hoping to use the opportunity to do a little more feeling out of the situation in a less potentially “threatening” context than sickbay.

 

Her immediate impulse was to say no; Debbie’s conviction that there was something terribly wrong with the bracelet and her dogged insistence that she’d witnessed some sort of radical personality change while they were down on the planet still rankled, and maybe it was unfair but she’d started to feel as if Caroline had taken Debbie’s side automatically during the meeting in Debbie’s office. Anna bit back the refusal, giving Caroline a speculative glance as they both came to a stop in front of the turbolift up the corridor from Sickbay. The last thing she wanted to do was revisit the subject of the bracelet--she’d felt like she was escaping as they’d left the medical department but maybe it would be a good idea to talk with Caroline outside of the CMO’s influence. Debbie’s opinion always carried tremendous weight and rightly so but this time there had definitely been extenuating circumstances that could cast doubt on her usually keen abilities.

 

“Sure, that sounds like a great idea,” Anna replied, stepping into the lift as the doors slid back. “Wonder what the special in the mess is,” she added as she turned to face Caroline.

 

“It’s some Bolian dish I’ve never heard of. We can just swing by my quarters and replicate something, maybe,” Caroline said, grinning casually, but she hadn’t missed the glance directed her way as she had broached the subject. A doubtful glance, almost as if Anna mistrusted the counselor’s motives. “Bit quieter there too.”

 

“That sounds nice,” Anna agreed, her expression softening as she started to relax. Caroline was a friend after all, as was Debbie. They were good friends--the best. The meeting had been uncomfortable but she reminded herself that the two women only had her best interests and those of the ship in mind. They were just showing misguided concern is all. There was no need to get so defensive. Caroline was merely following Debbie’s lead--naturally the ship’s counselor would be inclined to listen to the chief medical officer. It was up to Anna to point out that there were reasons why Debbie hadn’t been herself. “It’s always nice to see Nelson. Has he managed to finish killing off your plants yet?” Caro’s cat had established his preference for chewing all things chlorophyll-based early on in his kittenhood.

 

Caroline chuckled, agreeable to keeping the conversation light, giving Anna the chance to calm down from a meeting that had obviously caused her some tension. “More or less. I’m having a go with a little fern-type thing that either tastes bad or he’s decided to give it a more lingering fate; everything else so far has succumbed.” Moving down the corridor from sickbay, she stepped into the lift as it slid open for them. “Deck seven.”

 

Caroline’s description of the fern’s plight compelled a smile and it was with a lighter step that Anna exited the lift. “Hard to judge his motives,” she said, managing to keep a straight face. “I guess time will tell and maybe an intercession with some cat nip.”

 

“We’ll see. For now I’m considering it a study in feline determination and letting events play out as they will,” Caroline said dryly, following her friend back out of the lift. “I’m busy enough as it is and I guess it makes him happy.” Approaching her quarters, she stepped inside as the door slid open and moved towards the replicator. “What would you like?”

 

Trailing behind, Anna paused just over the threshold of Caroline’s quarters and glanced around, saying, “I’ll have steak preparation #8 and an ale, please.” Spotting Nelson on the couch, she walked over and squatted down in front of where he was lying. “Hello, Nelson..are you the Destroyer of Foliage?” She scratched him behind the ears and under the chin. “He’s such a handsome cat, Caro.”

 

“Mmm...and he knows it too,” Caroline said with a laugh, watching the orange tabby cat roll over with a blissful expression, batting at Anna’s hand with his paws. The replicator pinged its readiness with Anna’s meal and Caroline looked over at it, bemused by the nearly blood-red rareness of the steak sitting in sharp contrast too its white plate. Between that and the ale, Caroline couldn’t help a raised eyebrow. This wasn’t the first time she’d noticed Anna in somewhat medieval mood with her food choices recently, she reflected thoughtfully. “A plate of hasperat and a glass of water,” she said to the replicator, grabbing Anna’s plate and moving it out of the way to the table.

 

Glancing up, Anna saw Caroline putting the plates on the table and reluctantly gave Nelson a final belly rub before standing up and crossing the room to the table. “Did I tell you that I had to give Chauncey to Agatha Wentworth?”

 

“Really? Why?” Caroline asked curiously. “He not getting along with Will?”

 

“He’s never warmed up to Will and to his credit, Will has always just taken it in stride.” Anna took her seat and watched as Caroline finished getting their meal together. “It’s me that Chaunce doesn’t seem to get along with anymore, actually,” she continued, still bewildered by the change in the cockatoo. “I don’t know why but a few weeks ago he started behaving very agitatedly when I’d approach his area and seemed to be losing his appetite. I tried to give it some time, changed up a few things but when he began plucking his feathers out--they do that when under stress--I realized he needed a different environment for his own good. Agatha very graciously agreed to take him.”

 

“That was nice of her,” Caroline agreed, sitting down at the table with her plate, watching absently as Nelson proceeded to follow Anna to her chair, rubbing against her legs with a low, vibrating purr. She had never personally owned a bird, and as such she didn’t really know what to think regarding this tidbit of gossip regarding Anna’s; in light of previous recent conversations, however, it was hard not to attribute meaning to other things as well. There was a short pause and then she commented neutrally, “So between what you and Deb have told me, it sounds like you had a pretty chaotic time planetside.”

 

“We did,” Anna agreed fervently, cutting into her steak with alacrity. She’d missed lunch today and the steak would just hit the spot. “It was storming fiercely the entire time and when we weren’t being attacked by some prehistoric throwback, we were chasing after Kat. Will and Debbie were severely injured in the shuttle crash and then Jon nearly had his leg bitten off.”

 

Pausing to take a bite of the meat, she washed it down with some of the ale before looking earnestly to Caroline. “That’s why I am having a hard time understanding how Debbie can be so sure I wasn’t myself for two seconds or whatever it was. She said herself that it was very brief and this was right after she’d been injured--she could barely walk and had lost a lot of blood and Kat was acting deranged! I was outside of the shuttle going after Kat and that storm was going full boat--we were in the pouring rain with lightning flashing all around. Will had a terrible head injury and I was worried sick about him as well as everyone else. I ask you, Caro, why would I have been myself?”

 

“I have no idea. I wasn’t there, Anna,” Caroline said soothingly, hearing the sudden uptick of defensive energy in the other woman’s voice. “But I’m sure Deb only suggested it because she was concerned for you; you seem to be taking it as an attack.”

 

“Well, maybe because that’s how it feels,” Anna replied sharply, unconsciously twisting the bracelet on her wrist before taking a deep breath, the headache she’d been having on and off for the past month suddenly coming back with a vengeance.

 

“Anna...” Caroline leaned forward slightly, catching Anna’s eyes. “I assure you you are not under attack. We have been asking after you because we are concerned.”

 

“Yes...I know that,” Anna answered, more to herself than Caroline. “I do know that,” she repeated, managing a half-smile as she met Caroline’s gaze. “I appreciate the concern but I am also becoming irritated with it. This bracelet has unusual properties and though I have had some discomfiting moments while experiencing another woman’s memories, I am also intrigued and think that a little discomfort is not a lot to put up with in the face of scientific inquiry. This is why I am loathe to have it removed by dint of cutting it off. I am sure it would destroy it’s unique properties and my questions would never be answered.”

 

“I understand that,” Caroline answered calmly, “which is why I haven’t brought it to a sticking point before now.” She leaned back in her seat, watching Anna’s expression carefully. “Anna, it’s my job to look out for people dealing with strange mental phenomena; I inquire because it’s my job, and because I am concerned for your well-being, not because I am looking for opportunities to rain on your parade.” She paused, then asked slowly, “Have you talked to Will about the bracelet at all?”

 

Frowning, she didn’t like the expression ‘strange mental phenomena’, Anna leaned back in her seat, her appetite gone, though that was mostly the fault of the headache. Mostly. “I have mentioned it to him several times as a matter of fact, Caro, and I admit that he was startled when it locked and wanted me to have it removed immediately but I told him that though the dreams and odd moments of recollection while waking were a little disturbing, I wanted to continue to study it. He hasn’t said a word to me about it in weeks.” Which in and of itself was odd, Anna thought, suddenly very distracted.

 

“Hmm,” Caroline said, her expression deliberately neutral. Will Tomlinson had, in fact, been the first person to bring Caroline’s attention to Anna’s new piece of jewelry, along with his concerns about it. She would have bet quite a bit that he wasn’t as sanguine about it now as Anna was making him out to be. “Well, I’m making no recommendations for the time being, but I won’t deny I’d like to keep a closer eye on your...research. If it comes to any further point that it’s causing overt effects on your mental chemistry during waking hours, I think I will have to recommend we cut it off.”

 

“What?” Anna jerked her head up, eyes narrowing in a glare that left Caro in no doubt as to her displeasure with this announcement. “I have been very forthcoming and have spoken candidly about how this extraordinary experience has affected me--yes it’s caused some discomfort and yes it has been unnerving at times!”

 

She pushed her chair back so forcefully it almost toppled over as she surged to her feet. “But no one, not even Debbie, has been able to say that I haven’t done my job. Some sort of ancient technology is at work here and it’s my intention to figure it out which I would like to point out is my job. I like to think I have been very patient because I’m aware that Debbie and now you believe you are acting out of genuine concern for my welfare, Caro. But I am the chief science officer and this falls under my jurisdiction and no one, not you or the CMO can order it removed without my say so--unless you are both prepared to declare me unfit for duty!”

 

Caroline stared at Anna, whose sudden burst of adrenaline, seemingly out of nowhere, had left her standing, staring at Caroline with shoulders heaving and a furious gleam in her eye. “Anna, calm down. No one is questioning your ability, I’m merely--”

 

“They aren’t? Really, Caro? I’m running a simple experiment but have been questioned at every turn as if I were losing my mind. Our CMO, a woman I happen to respect enormously and care for deeply as a friend, as much as told me that I was possessed--by...wait for it--a bracelet. And now the ship’s counselor--also a friend, feels perfectly comfortable in suggesting said bracelet be cut off--as if I have no say in it whatsoever. How is that not questioning my ability?”

 

“Not your ability, Anna -- we’re merely questioning what effect that bracelet might be having on you,” Caroline said, becoming far more concerned by Anna’s uncharacteristic defensiveness than by anything she had yet said regarding the jewelry’s properties. “You’ve said yourself that it is affecting you mentally--”

 

“I said there have been some uncomfortable moments while awake and some extremely vivid dreams,” Anna snapped back, not caring that she’d interrupted Caroline. She’d heard enough and held her hand up to forestall anything else her friend had to say. “My head is splitting and I’m leaving before I say something I’ll regret. It’s been a long day.” She turned and headed determinedly for the door, the pounding in her skull now acute.

 

Caroline watched her stalk out, her eyebrows climbing towards her hairline in surprise at the unwarranted anger from the other woman. “Yes, it has,” she said aloud, though Anna was already out of the room, the door hissing shut behind her.

 

Well, if I didn’t feel I had grounds for concern before, I do now, Caroline thought tiredly, and, frowning, she looked away from the door and back towards Anna’s half-eaten meal, the blood-rare steak seeping red onto its plate. Suddenly not hungry herself either, she pushed her own plate aside and stood up quickly, almost tripping over Nelson as she did so. With Anna’s exit, the cat had pressed himself against Caroline’s chair; the hair was standing up all along his back, and his mouth was wide in a frightened, defensive hiss.