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rosetto

Two more Parodies

Only Enterprise (parody of Alice Cooper's 'Only Women Bleed')

 

Will's got his women to take his seed

Geodi's got power –oh

Tasha's got needs

She spent her lives through yet another captain

She speeds them to the stars or anywhere she can

She breaches her core to often

She chokes and sinks and don't respond at all

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Kirk made you refit

He's his own mistake

All you're really seeking out is alien landscapes

Jean Luc whines at you

You know you hate that tea

He points his finger commands and you take them to warp 3

She breaches her core to often

She chokes and sinks and don't respond at all

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Warp Drive; Space & Time

All misaligned

But beading the line

Any you there in Jefferies' tube

It was so overused

Conduit fused inside

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

Only Enterprise

--rosetto

In My Tractor Beam (parody of Alice Cooper's 'Under My Wheels')

The transporter shimmers

Not another rerun

I just got the cable bill

The syndicate begun

Warping my drive up to you, babe

Guess I could always dream, yeah yeah

You're in my tractor beam

Aren't you attracted to me

Cuz when you engage the teleport

Saying this mission is abort

I just cannot go on report

Captain sends me packing to spaceport

The transporter shimmers

You got me on the pad

Another sexy geek-type now

You're in my tractor beam

You're in my tractor beam

You're in my tractor beam

Yeah yeah

You're in my tractor beam

Yeah yeah

You're in my tractor beam

The transporter shimmers

It's just another alien

I'm engaging warp drive now

Manipulating time

Warping my drive up to you, babe

Guess I could always dream, yeah yeah

You're in my tractor beam, honey

Aren't you attracted to me

You're in my tractor beam

You're in my tractor beam

You're in my tractor beam

Yeah yeah

My Tractor Beam

Yeah yeah

My Tractor Beam

Yeah yeah

--rosetto

Edited by rosetto

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Be My Captain (parody of Alice Cooper's 'Be My Lover')

 

She passes through the doors

Before I say enter

But with a tricorder scan

I just sort of look her over, ahh

She has a heart or two

Well, maybe three

And then suddenly she starts shimmering

Like in a beam

She says

 

Baby, if you wanna be my captain

You need to say the word

Cuz it’s a long long way to Rigel V

And this is still ten forward

 

Told her that I came

From Deneb 14

And only controlled the helm

On a galactic class starship

She asked me why

The captain’s name was Picard

I said listen, baby

I really think you’re gonna flip

 

And I said

 

Baby, if you want me

to be your captain

You’re gonna have to wait

Cuz it’s a long long way to captain’s bars

And I’m still junior grade

 

Oh, baby, if you want me

To be the captain

You just might have to wait

Cuz it’s a long long way to captain’s bars

And I’m still junior graaaaade…

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Where No One Has Gone Before

(parody of Jet's 'Are you gonna be my girl?')

 

Engage!

So 1, 2, 3

the first star is right for me

These things I have in mind

Are the voyages of the Enterprise

 

These things I have in mind

Are the voyages of the Enterprise

 

Oh, 4,5,6

Get your warp factor fixed

We don’t need any money

Space is the final frontier, honey

 

Long black boots

Skirt’s in air

She’s so tweaked

With her pony tail

 

Well, I could see

Your future with me

But you’re on your own mission, yeah

Seek out new life

and new cityscapes

To boldly go another way, yeah

To go, where no one has gone before. Yeah

 

Well, so 1, 2, 3

the first star is right for me

These things I have in mind

Are the voyages of the Enterprise

 

These things I have in mind

Are the voyages of the Enterprise

 

Oh, 4,5,6

Get your warp factor fixed

We don’t need any money

Space is the final frontier

 

Long black boots

Skirt’s in air

She’s so tweaked

With her pony tail

 

I could see

Your future with me

But you’re on your own mission, yeah

Seek out new life

and new cityscapes

To boldly go another way, yeah

Where no one has gone before. Yeah

 

 

I could see

Your future with me

But you’re on your own mission, yeah

Seek out new life

and new cityscapes

To boldly go another way, yeah

Uh, Gone before

Gone before

Where no one has gone before. Yeah

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If you wanna return

(parody of Jimmy Soul - 'If you wanna be happy')

 

If you wanna return to the ship unhurt

Let the one in the red shirt go first

Choose to take another point of view

You might return a pile of goo

 

If you wanna return to the ship unhurt

Let the one in the red shirt go first

Choose to take another point of view

You might return a pile of goo

 

A 1st year ensign makes one look small

And very often causes your downfall.

Always questions every word you state

Always rushing in and just can’t wait

But if you let the red shirt go first

You’re gonna return to the ship unhurt

Doesn’t matter; you breach protocol

You’ll be laughing again tomorrow

 

If you wanna return to the ship unhurt

Let the one in the red shirt go first

Choose to take another point of view

You might return a pile of goo

 

Don’t let your mates see you afraid

Go ahead and send him anyway

Though he’s inexperienced; he can’t shoot

It’s gonna be better him than you

 

If you wanna return to the ship unhurt

Let the one in the red shirt go first

Choose to take another point of view

You might return a pile of goo

 

Say Commander

Hey Lieutenant

Saw that ensign the other day

Yeah?

Yeah, He’s Dead Jim!

Yeah, He’s dead but I’m still bold

Yeah? Okay.

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The Starship Enterprise

(parody of Eagles - 'Hotel California')

 

In a dark matter nebula, loosing at truth or dare

Strong pull of gravitation, Radiation every where

Up ahead on the view screen, I saw a shimmering light

The ship grew heavy and impulse went limp

We had to stop or be fried

 

Standing there in the hanger bay;

What would this mission tell?

Cuz I was thinking to myself

‘I need to do this right or catch the hell’

Then she lit up a phaser

And she showed me the bay

There were voices on the intercom

I thought I heard them say

 

Welcome aboard the starship Enterprise

Such a lovely lady

Such a ship of grace

There’s plenty of room on the starship Enterprise

Any time or year, there’s been 6 remakes

 

Her core is multi-dimensioned, she got the anti-matter propulsion

She got a lot of busy little boys, on which she depends

How they jump in Engineering, multi-species’ sweat

Some jump to recalibrate, some jump to refit

 

So I hailed to the captain ‘please tell me my lines’

He said, ‘we haven’t had a retake here since nineteen sixty nine’

And still that voice keeps calling in the passage way

Wake you up in the middle of the night

To tell you it’s day

 

Welcome aboard the starship Enterprise

Such a lovely lady

Such a ship of grace

They go to warp on the starship Enterprise

What I can’t surmise, they’re buying these lies

 

No mirrors on the holodeck

And the planet ‘scape is ice

And she said ‘we’re gonna be stranded here if I can’t fix this device’

In the dilithium chambers

Something they forgot to tweak

They panic and run for their lives

As the coolant springs a leak

 

Last thing I remember, I was

Beating down the door

I had to get this simulation stopped

Or find the meaning of the core

‘relax’, said the ensign

We can reprogram easily

This is only degenerate matter

Stuck in virtual reality!

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Time to Feed Spot (Mr. Data Man)

(parody of Harry Bellafonte - 'Banana Boat Song')

 

 

Day-ta, Day-ay-ay-ta

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Day, me say day, me say day, me say day

Me say day, me say day-ay-ay-ta

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

 

Prowl all night going up and down

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Never a mouse for a cat to pounce

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

 

Come, Mister Geodi man, find me supplement

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Come, Mister Geodi man, find me supplement

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

 

It's six bits, seven bits, eight bits LUNCH!

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Six bits, seven bits, eight bits LUNCH!

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

 

Day, me say day-ay-ay-ta

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Day, me say day, me say day, me say day...

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

 

A little mew is all you hear from me

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Promise not to scratch Mr. Worf again

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

 

 

It's six bits, seven bits, eight bits LUNCH!

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Six bits, seven bits, eight bits LUNCH!

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

 

Day, me say day-ay-ay-ta

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Day, me say day, me say day, me say day...

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

 

Come, Mister Geodi man, find me supplement

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Come, Mister Geodi man, find me supplement

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

 

Day-o, day-ay-ay-ta

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

Day, me say day, me say day, me say day

Me say day, me say day-ay-ay-ta

Come Mr. Data me wan’ some grub

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Don't skip your line

(parody of Harry Belafonte's 'Jump In The Line')

 

Fake, fake, fake, Deana, fake another line

Make, make, make, Deana, make them redefine

Work, work, work, Deana, work it out in time

Work, work, work, Deana, read another mind

 

My girl’s name is Deana

I’d tell all your friends about it

When we let her drive, oh brother!

She’s a traffic jam no matter the light color

 

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Oh god, I believe it!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Come on, I can see you!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Oh god, I believe it!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Warp!

 

Fake, fake, fake, Deana, fake another line

Make, make, make, Deana, make them redefine

Work, work, work, Deana, work it out in time

Work, work, work, Deana, read another mind

 

You can read the mind of Kapellan

Klingon, Spic or the Alauran

Deana’s trick has some merit

Just what it is, well I can’t tell ya

 

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Oh god, I believe it!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Come on, I can see you!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Oh god, I believe it!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Warp!

 

Fake, fake, fake, Deana, fake another line

Make, make, make, Deana, make them redefine (Whoo)

Work, work, work, Deana, work it out in time (Yep)

Work, work, work, Deana, read another mind

 

Deana studies relations

The reason for averation

And fellas, you better watch her

When she’s tipped up, she flip up, don’t drive the rocket!

 

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Oh god, I believe it!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) You call that a uniform?

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Jumpin’ Jiminnies

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Whoa oh oh oh!

 

[break]

 

Deana’s been to 12 Leo

Left to the right of Albedo

And when she makes the decisions

Things go up in the air, come down in confusion

 

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Oh god, I believe it!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Somebody tell her!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Oh god, I believe it!

(Don’t skip your line, get it right this time) Whoopie!

 

Fake, fake, fake, Deana, fake another line

Make, make, make, Deana, make them redefine

Work, work, work, Deana!!

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?????...why is this here again???

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??? since these are all original parodies written by me I am confused ???

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