Her Own Prison

[H.G. Reed 0]

It was disconcerting, to say the least, not knowing who one was. To wake up in a strange place, albeit one that seemed vaguely familiar, and to be unaware of who she was or her purpose for being there was disturbing to her composure. It was utterly preposterous to realize that she didn’t even know what to call herself, and being unable to describe what she looked like, such an integral part of individual uniqueness, was an entirely separate cause for alarm.

 

She supposed that she was on a ship, as all indications lead to that being the case, but even though she understood what a ship was, it was impractical to think of it as such; further inquiry into that line of thought would merely produce more questions than answers, leading to additional sources of frustration. At first it had been somewhat comforting to know that there were others on board, who might be able to explain matters. When she had first entered the command centre via the service conduit, it had been under the assumption that her condition was an isolated one and could somehow be reversed in very short order. However, it had quickly become apparent that any others who were awake were in the same state as she; a worrisome thought indeed.

 

She had assessed the situation with the two men who were awake within the command centre when she arrived, and it was easy to come to the conclusion that the ship was in trouble. Consoles reporting “hull breach” and “failing structural integrity” indicated at least that much. She knew these words, could piece together their meaning and understand the seriousness of their predicament, yet the deeper implications they presented, and how to address them, eluded her understanding. Instinctively, she knew that the knowledge required to set things right was somewhere within her, but like a shimmering oasis beckoning desert travellers, it was just beyond her present reach.

 

In order to avoid succumbing to the rising hysteria within her, she had done what seemed to come naturally: make suggestions and give directions. She wondered if this was an indication of her personality when she was quite herself, but let that thought pass in favour of more pressing concerns. Her suggestions, in conjunction with input from the two men, had allowed them to form a plan of action, given them something to do rather than merely await whatever type of rescue might or might not have been coming.

 

She had found she couldn’t abide idleness; it merely led her down paths best left unexplored. So, after logically deducing the person likely to be in charge, the slightly older man who with an accent (although given that the other man sounded different as well, perhaps she had an accent herself) she had agreed that it would be best to go down to Engineering at once to see what might be done to improve their situation. Following the other man (who had yet to introduce himself, an understandable oversight in this case) back down the service conduit, she tried to assimilate all that she knew or could piece together, while still fighting the feeling of being trapped within the constraints of her own mind.