One Heck of a Mess ((Matthews/Swan/Curtis))

[Samantha_Kent 0]

Caroline eased herself quietly back through the doors of Debbie's office carrying a hypospray of the drug which she had proposed to offer Schawnsee as part of her treatment plan. It was a cocktail of an antidepressant, a standard treatment for chemical imbalance, and a mild sedative -- not enough to knock the CSEC out but enough to relax her. Schawnsee had been displaying enough paranoia for three women and though the drugs, on their own, were not going to be a complete treatment for what she was going through, Caroline hoped that they might perhaps take the edge off her tension and make life easier for everyone involved.

 

For now, though, Schawnsee was curled up in the corner; she had begun to cry in an explosive emotional release and Deb had taken up a position next to her with an arm around her. Caroline remained as quiet as she could as she entered the room; Schawnsee had already expressed a pretty definite distrust for the psychologist and Caroline did not want to overwhelm her with more than she could handle. Silently, she cast Deb a questioning look, her eyes moving with an expression of concern to the CSEC and then back to the other physician, and proffered the full hypospray at her with a faint shrug.

 

Debbie carefully used her free arm to reach out toward Caroline and take the hypospray from her hand. Under routine circumstances, she would have allowed Dr. Curtis to administer the drugs. But these were anything but 'routine circumstances.' Kat clearly distrusted the psychiatrist. It was only exacerbate the situation for Caroline to come much closer to the security chief....at least for now.

 

Never in her wildest dreams did the CMO expect to see Schawnsee in this condition....not after everything the security chief had been through during her career. If it was this painful for Deb to watch, she could only imagine what Angel was going through. And what about Kat? The demons tormenting her were relentless. Deb was almost certain Schawnsee hadn't slept a full night in weeks. She sincerely hoped there was a sedative included in the drug cocktail she was about to push into Kat's neck. But she'd wait until later to ask.

 

"I promise you, Kat," whispered Deb, turning slightly toward the sobbing woman. "Everything will be okay. We'll fix this....I swear to you....we'll fix it." She glanced momentarily at Caroline and then quickly pressed the hypospray to Schawnsee's neck. She didn't hesitate once the small instrument was in position. Pushing the little button, she heard the hypospray release the drugs, forcing them through the skin and into Kat's bloodstream. Glancing at Caroline, she tossed the hypospray back to her while tightening her grip on the security chief not knowing what to expect next.

 

Kat was crying heavily. She had a mix of feelings running through her head. She heard the hypospray release its contents into her neck and slowly looked up to Deb and then Dr Curtis. As she felt the sedative begin its work on her, she grabbed Deb's hand tighter than she had ever done before. She then looked back at Deb, tears running down her face and said, "Doc don't let them hurt me, please? I'm scared." She then began to fade slightly, releasing the tightness on Deb's hand. She then began to sink more to the floor.

 

The sedative may not have been a strong one but Schawnsee was very susceptible to drugs and it didn't take much to put her almost out. She was now more in a state that a person would be if she were on a truth serum. She was not totally asleep but she wasn't awake either. Her body was limp. She could barely open her eyes. She was indeed fighting to try to remain awake.

 

Caroline let out a slow breath as Deb released the drugs into Kat's system. She didn't much like administering treatment this way; she tried to avoid dispensing drugs willy-nilly as part of her approach to psychological problems as a general rule anyway and this situation was even stranger than normal. She let herself settle again against the corner of Deb's desk and ran a hand down her face before looking at Deb questioningly. "Is she still awake?" she asked quietly. The drug had not been calculated to incapacitate Kat, merely to relax her, but she had gone over like a felled tree with the sudden tension release.

 

The CMO shook her head. "She's asleep and that's okay," she replied, glancing up at Caroline. The psychiatrist's expression was one of both relief and concern. "I was hoping you'd included a sedative," continued Deb with a sigh. "She probably hasn't slept in weeks."

 

Schawnsee was trying to fight the sedative but finally gave in to it. She let out a soft, relaxing sigh and drifted off to a more relaxed state. She could still hear the voices but they seemed father away than before. She loosened her grip even more on Deb's hand, her own hand falling to the ground as her knees weakened and she sat completely on the floor, legs sliding out from under her. Her head now rested on Deb's shoulder.

 

Debbie leaned back against the wall and looked up at the ceiling, allowing herself a moment or two to catch her breath. "I would love to send her home but under the circumstances...." She paused as she thought about Kat's plea not to let them hurt her. The woman was convinced she was living in an artificial reality....a realty created and manipulated by the Romulans....and Kat was terrified. Allowing her to wake up in her own quarters would certainly help relax her but she really needed the supervision available only in Sickbay. Deb again met Caroline's gaze. "I think it's safer to keep her here....at least for a day or two....until the drugs kick in and she shows improvement....any degree of improvement. What's your opinion?"

 

Caroline nodded. "Yes,...if we can make her comfortable here...to be honest I'm not sure she'd trust her own quarters more than she trusts anything else on this ship." She let her head drop forward and rubbed her forehead with the heels of her hands. A feeling of sudden frustration went through her that this case had been allowed to get to this point. She didn't know what she could have done differently but nevertheless she felt responsible when a patient showed a downturn while under her care. Things were far from irreparable at this point, of course, or at least she hoped so; she just hated seeing this woman so miserable and watching her initial attempts to help seeming so ineffective.

 

"You're right about her not trusting her quarters." Debbie spoke softly as though concerned she might awaken the drugged security officer on the floor beside her. "After her exam, she said she wanted to be alone.....asked if she could go to the isolation ward." The CMO closed her eyes and sighed again. "I suppose we could accommodate her. There's nobody in isolation right now," she added sadly.

 

"She has taken this much harder than anyone else on the ship," Caroline said after a few second's silence, looking back up, her expression tired but back to its usual calm. "I don't know how much she tends towards this sort of reaction under general circumstances or if this is somewhat unique in her history...in either case we will have to tread relatively carefully. I hope that the opportunity to relax will allow her to look at things a little more objectively, that the rest will reduce some of the paranoia which may be stemming from her own subconscious understanding that she is not fit to work or defend herself. Beyond that...as she grows more comfortable I will continue to talk to her. And..." Her voice trailed off and she looked at Deb somewhat apologetically. "I believe you should as well...she seems to trust you as much as anyone on this ship; in the early stages of this, your presence will be important." Her concerned expression shifted its focus onto Deb's appearance now as the physician leaned herself back against the wall; she looked as worn by all of this as Caroline felt. "How are you holding up?" she asked more quietly, taking the opportunity afforded by the lull of Kat's sedation to check in with her coworker. They were going to be doing a lot of work before this was all over.

 

"I'm baffled by all of this." The answer to Caroline's question was made without hesitation or any serious thought. Deb really was bewildered...not only by Kat's reaction but by her own confounding behavior. She tapped her comm badge and ordered a gurney brought to her office before continuing her discussion with Caroline. "I've suffered through my own doubts since our encounter with the Romulans," said Deb in a quiet voice. She nodded toward their sleeping patient. "But I can't relate to what she's going through." Looking intently at Dr. Curtis, the CMO drew a couple of deep breaths. "I'm her doctor and her friend. I'll do whatever is necessary to help her through this. But, to be honest with you, it is a little unnerving. Don't get me wrong. I don't believe we're living in an elaborate reality created by the Romulans. I really don't. But life has be so....unsettled since the last mission. It's hard to put into words. It's like...it's as though my skin doesn't fit quite right." She smiled wryly. "And Kat is feeling it a thousand times worse than I am. She's always been so level headed...a truly grounded person. To see her like this....well....like I said...it's unnerving."

 

"Everyone occasionally reaches a point...where they have to stop and take stock again of where and who they are," Caroline said slowly, deciding that the term 'breaking point' might not be the most reassuring descriptor in the current situation. "Both of you have every right to still be working through that point...it's just a matter of making things as comfortable as possible during the process, for everyone involved."

 

The conversation was interrupted as Grace Allen and two corpsmen arrived. The carefully scooped up Kat and gently placed her on the gurney, covering her with a light blanket. "Take her to isolation," ordered Deb as she pushed herself to her feet. "She's not contagious or anything like that. She needs privacy right now and that's about as private a place as we can provide." Waiting until the patient had been taken away, Debbie stepped over to her desk and settled against it. She looked at Caroline who was less than a meter away. "This is one heck of a mess," she muttered. "Maybe I'll work through my own uncertainties as we help Kat deal with hers."

 

Caroline smiled faintly. 'One heck of a mess' was the most accurate and honest description she had heard offered for this situation since she had come aboard. "I have no doubt you will," she said, reaching over to lay her hand reassuringly for a moment against Deb's shoulder. There was clearly more on Deb's mind than just the difficulty of Kat's position and Caroline didn't want her to feel that just because Kat's condition was overtly more serious that Caroline's attention was distracted from everything else. "And if you'd like to talk again about other things than Kat, you know you have only to ask." Twisting her neck as if to work a kink out of it, she stood up and moved across the office, looking out into the main bay as the medtechs disappeared into isolation with the gurney. "Have someone let me know when she starts coming out from under the sedation and at that point...I guess we'll see how it goes from there."

Edited July 5, 2009 by Samantha_Kent