Sakiko's File

[Sakiko Anami 0]

Starfleet Historical Database	Sakiko's Personal Record
"Prologue - A Heavy Heart"   Name: Sakiko Anami Ship: U.S.S. Reaent Rank: Petty Officer Third Class Position: Assistant Medical Officer Current Role: None Location: Starbase 1123   MEDICAL INFORMATION; Medical Status: Normal RPD Level: Low

 

 

Sakiko sat against the window, her back lying gently against the barrier that separated the small room with the unmerciful vacuum of space. She may have been sitting there for a good few hours now but never once felt like sleeping. It had been a long few days since she left Earth and the Medical Academy. She had been jumping from one terminal to another to meet up with the Reaent's arrival and so she didn't get all that much sleep. However, now that she was there, she didn't feel at all like sleeping. Instead she chose to sit there staring into the vastness of space waiting for destiny to approach her.

 

She curled up into herself and shivered as if she were cold. Shakily she laid her hand on the window and brushed her fingers through the stars. The stars, so beautifully laid out like confetti sprinkled on pitch black waters. She marvelled at the apparent magnificence that surrounded her, yet she couldn't help but feel afraid of it at the same time. What is it that humans experience that makes us so receptive to the idea of adventure? Those old explorers like Kirk and Columbus always had something in common, they were all crazy, simple radicals that refused to sit in one spot and admire the view. Sakiko sat up and giggled lightly at her own thought process.

Your mind is always so closed, Sakiko. Someday that will come up and bite you, no wait. It already has.

She stopped and sighed softly under her breath.

 

"I'm sorry…" Sakiko whispered and she drew little circles on the glass.

'

Sorry' never cut it before did it? What is that supposed to mean, really?

Sakiko shivered again and she could feel her eyes feeling a little heavy and it wasn't from sleep deprivation. She shakily drew her hand away from the window and closed her eyes lightly to try and relax.

Look at yourself, you wear that uniform… and for what?

 

Sakiko looked at herself, dressed in a Starfleet uniform. She never did feel comfortable wearing the attire, but she couldn't change it now. She softly took off her communications badge and flipped it between her fingers.

I have to give it to you, it is quite shinny. You could use the pointy part to gouge someone's eye out.

She sighed heavily as if she disapproved with something, perhaps the smell of the air.

 

Calmly, she set the communications badge on the table beside her and stared it for a moment. The Starfleet insignia seemed to stare right back at her as if even the badge itself was insulting her.

Huh look at me! I'm the symbol of your wasted life.

"Taro… I wish you were still alive." Sakiko spoke quietly to herself as she stared at the Starfleet insignia.

That isn't the first time you've said that, Sakiko.

 

There was music playing in the room, it sounded so light and happy. Sakiko smiled lightly as if she was mesmerized by the woman's singing. She closed her eyes softly as if she could see the words in her mind.

That's what you should have been, Sakiko… someone you actually wanted to be.

 

An hour or two passed and Sakiko had nearly fallen asleep. She woke up shakily and sighed gently as the calmness of the room settled once more. Sakiko sat up slowly and stared at the floor. She looked over her shoulder to the stars once again and brushed her fingers on the glass, "This is okay… isn't it?"

Sakiko, it never was okay. You know that. Why do you keep asking yourself that question?

 

Thump… thump. Sakiko could feel her heart started to slow. She could feel her breath suddenly start to diminish but Sakiko was calm, in fact she almost welcomed it. She placed her hand on her chest and felt the light thump of her heartbeat tapping softly against her hand… but it was slowing down.

Sakiko… don't do this anymore, please.

She reached over to the table and softly picked up an extremely small cartridge, it was a light green liquid and she held it in her palm.

You're just to keep lying to yourself, aren't you? You think that 'medicine' really helps you? It's the only thing tying you down.

Sakiko rolled the green cartridge in her hand gently then she pulled up her right sleeve to reveal a bracelet on her wrist.

Someday they'll know, Sakiko. You can't shut me out forever… not again.

She inserted the cartridge in a very small slot, and then she lifted her bracelet so it gently touched her neck.

Someday it'll kill you.

Sakiko felt the injection pierce into her neck, her breathing returned to normal and she stopped sweating.

Someday it'll all happen again.

 

"…Again", Sakiko whispered to herself. She took another deep breath and pulled her sleeve up while staring at her hand, "Again… I cheat death."

 

She looked up slowly through the window. There was now a ship that could be seen in the far distance. Sakiko could see small lights flickering on and off as the ship moved closer to the Starbase. She picked off her communications badge from the table and looked it once more; it seemed to be as hard and as inanimate as before. After staring at her communications badge for a while she finally pinned the badge back onto her uniform and closed her eyes again slowly.

 

"遣る。。。遣る," she said lightly. Suddenly, she smiled and she felt confident again. She picked up her belongings on the table and made her way to the docking area, where she waited until the Reaent would arrive.

 

The ship looked magnificent. It was large, and carried a stature stronger than any human figure Sakiko had ever known. The USS Reaent seemed to glide passed the gigantic doors of the Starbase and move ever so elegantly towards her. Sakiko marvelled at not only at its beauty but its strength. Her hand came up onto the glass and she pressed her hand against it as if comparing the size of her hand to the ship itself. She smiled again as if joking with her own conscious. "This is where you're meant to be, Sakiko. "

 

After a while, the Reaent's nacelles began to darken, the ship was shutting down after its long and painful voyage back to safe havens. It looked sad however, the ship. It had many holes, burnt plating and other damaged parts. Deep down inside, Sakiko felt sad for the ship, as if the ship had a soul and it was very weary. She brushed her hand over the ship's image and smiled gently as if trying to console it for its injuries, "and so you rest… rest peacefully… you deserve it. I'm here, to protect your crew… will you protect me, ship of the stars?"

 

"You've experienced many harsh memories and much pain." Clasping her hands in front of her, "may you rest in peace… again you will sail the stars, as you always have before."

 

Sakiko then bowed deeply and respectfully to the USS Reaent, she looked up again and then she glanced over her shoulder. A large entourage of officers were walking passed the busy corridors; she knew right away, these were the officers of the Reaent. Even though they didn't notice her at all, she bowed respectfully as they passed her by whispering softly under her breath, "my name is Sakiko and I will protect you."

Edited May 18, 2009 by Sakiko Anami

[TKAR 0]

QUITE LOGICAL -welcome