On Pain

[Shadow 0]

On Pain

 

As slow as he was to grasp the concept of mortality, Shadow was quickly coming to an understanding of pain as he believed his biological crewmates experienced it. He knew the pain of loss, of course, having lost his bond, his cohorts, and all he knew when Agincourt wrenched him from his own universe not long ago. He had noticed that the crew experienced that same sense of loss, especially when losing someone or something dear, as he had. With that kind of pain he could not help, and it saddened him.

 

He had been, however, studying and experimenting with his energy in the hope that he would be able to alleviate the physical pain now experienced by some of the crew because of their injuries. However, his efforts were not altogether altruistic. Unbeknownst to them, their pain became his because their physical pain altered their energy signatures, which, in turn, altered his. This altered signature not only confused him, but distressed him, and he interpreted that distress as “feeling pain.” Those with whom he had formed close friendships – or whose energy signatures were most familiar to him – altered his energy to a greater degree than those who were not so familiar. So, although they could often hide their pain from other biologicals, they could not hide their pain from Shadow.

 

Which brings us to Shadow’s encounter with Commander JoNs on the bridge. Shadow’s conversation with Tay and the sadness they both felt during their recovery missions had compelled him to look for an outlet. Perhaps the performance of some good would help alleviate his depression. The JoNs was in pain, both emotional and physical. He could not help her with the emotional pain, but he sincerely felt that after experimenting with his energy and learning about biological bodies he could help with the feline’s physical pain.

 

It seemed simple enough. According to the medical database in the central computer, energy traveled through the biologicals’ bodies via a network of what they called neurons to something they called a spinal cord, a relay station that branched the impulse into a reflex and a message to a central area called the brain, which gave them the pain and often resulted in some kind of auditory outburst. This physical pain apparently was a warning to the body that something was amiss. The reflex in the spinal cord supposedly helped to prevent further injury.

 

The terminology, of course, was irrelevant. All Shadow had to do was find the energies that were traveling in the area of the pain and defuse them – in a manner of speaking. His biggest problem, however, was not finding the area of pain, but powering down his own energy – spreading himself as thin as possible – in order to accomplish his goal of absorbing, discharging, and effectively short-circuiting the pain without damaging the biological body.

 

This he did, slowly and carefully, disbursing his energy to the subatomic level. Each impulse that seemed out of place, each that interfered with his own recognition of the JoNs’s energy signature, he discharged from her body. After some minutes it seemed to be working. Though she seemed skeptical at first, she began to relax. Then she purred.