A Little Inquisition - Part Two

[DrDMatthews 0]

The door opened a few seconds after Grace rang the chime. She resisted the urge to again survey the corridor. Instead, she looked directly at the ship's XO and nodded. "Commander Ridire," she said calmly. "Thank you for agreeing to meet with me."

 

Aidan still isn't quite sure what's going on which is why he had agreed to this little appointment that Lt. Allen wanted. Though he can take some reasonable guesses. Lt. Allen...Gracie was part of Deb's department so obviously it doesn't have anything to do with Sickbay. If something was wrong with Sickbay, Gracie would have gone to Deb. And Deb thought the world of Gracie so he doesn't think it's some sort of personal conflict between the two women. Besides, Deb had indicated that Gracie knew of Deb and Aidan's relationship so he rather doubts that Gracie would come to him if she was having a problem with Deb. Which left...well..frankly his relationship with Deb as the reason why. Frankly, he isn't quite sure whether to be concerned or possibly bemused. It's not like Deb had given any indication that Gracie somehow had a problem with their relationship. Still.....

 

Aidan steps aside to let her in. As he does so he asks "Can I get you something to drink, Lieutenant?"

 

The chief nurse stepped inside, nodding to the Commander as she walked past him. "No thank you, sir," she replied to his inquiry about something to drink. Gracie made her way into the living area of the Commander's quarters and then turned to face him. "I'll try to be brief. I know your time is valuable. So is mine," she stated flatly. "But before I go any further, I respectfully request permission to speak.....freely."

 

He shrugs, "I don't hold to much formality when I'm off duty so you don't even need to ask permission to speak freely." He guides her to the couch before moving to one of the chairs where he sits down.

 

Gracie raised a brow at the Commander's remark. She doubted he understood her definition of freely but he would soon find out. "Very well," she replied, sitting down on the couch. "I would like to talk to you about Dr. Matthews." She studied Mr. Ridire's expression but he never blinked an eye.

 

"Dr. Matthews is my commanding officer," continued Gracie in a monotone. "She's an excellent physician and administrator. I enjoy working with her." Again, she scrutinized Ridire's face but he remained unreadable. "But Debbie....well....Debbie is my friend," added Gracie, her voice softening a bit. "The truth is, I think of her as a....younger sister. She's always on top of her game when it concerns to her profession. But when it comes to certain types of relationships, she's woefully inexperienced...not to mention naive."

 

Gracie leaned forward on the couch and looked directly at the Commander. "I know the two of you have been dating for a long time," she continued in a serious tone of voice. "And there's nothing wrong with that. I thought it was probably a good thing, especially for Debbie. Then all of a sudden, you propose and she accepts." Lieutenant Allen shrugged her shoulders. "She was so happy and I was pleased for her. But then she let something slip and I started wondering."

 

"Deb insisted, " continued Gracie, choosing her words carefully, "the two of you have never been.... physically intimate. Not even on the night you got engaged. She also claimed it was her idea to wait." Allen held up her hands and shrugged her shoulders. "I was surprised. I've always known she was....reserved and it didn't help that she was raised by her grandparents. But I never suspected she was that conservative. Not that it's wrong. It's just that her values aren't exactly....in vogue these days."

 

"I guess my question is this," she added quickly. "After taking your time all these months, is this why you proposed? Are you rushing to marry her because of the....sex?"

 

It was a good thing he isn't drinking something when Gracie asked that as he's sure he would have choked on it. As it is, his expression shows clear surprise for a moment before he narrows his eyes as his expression goes decidedly cold. "Meaning, you think I might be marrying her just to get her into bed. It's a good thing I know what is motivating you to ask that question because if you had done it from anything short of concern for her, I might have forgotten that I gave you permission to speak freely." He closes his eyes for a few moments, giving himself the time necessary to make sure he's not letting his anger at the affront of what she said guide him.

 

"Yes, we've never been physically intimate. Well...I should be a bit more specific....we're not lovers and yes it was her idea to wait. Now I'll admit to momentary surprise and a little frustration given the situation at the time...but I respect her choice and it was hers to make. And I am no cad, Gracie. As she'll tell you if you ask her, I have not pushed for us to take that step in all the time we've been dating and I would not let us cross that line now that I know what she expects. I do not wish to render the act meaningless by pushing her into it before she's ready and I don't wish to push her away from me like that."

 

Gracie studied him skeptically, her curiosity aroused. "I would never accuse Dr. Matthews of lying," she said, a small frown tugging on her lips. "I resisted the temptation to examine her medical file. That would be unethical." She paused a moment and looked into Ridire's eyes. "But there is something I'd like to know. If you and Debbie have never been physically intimate, what was she doing leaving your quarters early one morning?" She canted her head to one side and continued in a low voice. "That is no rumor. I saw her with my own eyes and it was obvious she'd spent the night here."

 

Aidan arches an eyebrow as he considers Gracie for a few seconds. "She left my quarters early that morning because she spent the night sleeping in my bed." He holds up a hand to forestall Gracie's reply before continuing, "We were having dinner that night or rather we were supposed to. Then the Captain called me away to tend to some things. Deb said she'd wait until I got back. By the time I got back it was extremely late and she had fallen asleep. I let her spend the rest of the night as opposed to making her try and get back to her quarters in a completely exhausted state. Nothing happened, I assure you, and certainly not what you're thinking."

 

"You can believe this or not as you choose....but I proposed to her because I love her beyond my own life. It has nothing to do with removing her restriction on becoming lovers and in fact if she wanted to keep that restriction after our marriage, I would be fine with that. I did not get into this relationship with her thinking that even if things worked out I wouldn't propose to her." He frowns slightly "The only thing that has affected this, Gracie, has been the mission we've been on the last few weeks. And only in so far as it made us aware that the fates may conspire to end one of our lives."

 

"Well," thought Lieutenant Allen silently, "at least he now understands what I meant by speaking freely."

 

She had been around a long time and she was proud of her ability to 'read' people. In short, she knew a con when she saw one. She watched Mr. Ridire carefully as he spoke and paid very close attention to his eyes. When he finally stopped speaking, she continued to study him for several seconds and then leaned back on the couch. He seemed sincere although she seriously doubted he would willingly accept a sexless marriage..

 

"Debbie told me you have never been anything but a gentleman," she said softly. "I'm pleased to hear that you plan to continue behaving that way. As confounding as it is to me, waiting until marriage is important to her." Gracie glanced around the room and smiled slightly. "But she's struggling with it. That's not to say she's changed her mind. As of our last conversation, she was still determined to go the distance. But it's proving to be more difficult than she anticipated."

 

Grace looked directly at the Commander. "Do you know why that is?"

 

He leans back in his chair as he considers the question for a minute. "Because she has never been in a relationship that's gotten as serious as ours has. And sometimes there is some conflict between what the mind says, what the heart says and what one may physically desire." He shrugs slightly, "But waiting until marriage is what she's promised herself and I see no reason for her to be disappointed."

 

"You're partially right," replied Grace with a slight shrug. "I think it's safe to say this is the most serious relationship she's ever had. And she's definitely conflicted. But the bottom line is.....she adores you. You've stirred up emotions she's kept buried for most of her adult life. She's finally gotten up the courage to take a chance but she's terrified of the very thing you believe has brought you to this point in the relationship. She's afraid something will happen to you and that would probably kill her."

 

Mr. Ridire started to speak but Gracie put up a hand to stop him. "She isn't going to allow her fear to stand between the two of you getting married. I'm just wondering if you fully appreciate the risk she's taking. Because, with all due respect, as the XO of this particular ship, the odds favor something nasty will happen to you."

 

 

 

"I think you misunderstood something. I did not say that I proposed to her because of what's been going on the last few weeks. All the events of the last few weeks did was make me realize that for however long I have in this life, I want it to be with her, as her husband. It did not cause me to decide to propose to her, I was already coming to that decision."

 

"And as for the fear that something may happen to me, I'd be a bald faced liar if I said I didn't have that fear myself. I know my job entails risk....probably the most risk of anyone on this ship. But as the events of the last weeks also show....we are all at risk, Gracie. I am not going to withdraw from her because of it anymore then she has allowed it to control her. If I die, it will hurt her terribly, I'm well aware of that. But if I walk away from her because of that fear it's not going to be any less painful for her...any less painful then it would be if she walked away from me or if something happened to her. If she asked me to leave Starfleet for her, I'd do it in a heartbeat."

 

"Life is risk, living life rather then merely surviving it entails risk. For quite a few years, I let fear of losing someone I loved and fear of loving keep me alone...solitary. It was Deb who cracked that shell I was creating around myself." He shrugs. "I love her, it's as simple as that."

 

"Yes," replied Gracie with a slight smile. "I believe you do." She pushed herself to her feet and stood in front of the couch. "I trust you will keep her heart close to yours and handle it with care. She is....special to me. If you intentionally hurt her...." She stopped abruptly and shook her head. "Never mind," she said quickly. "Hopefully, you will ever intentionally hurt her."

 

She started walking toward the door. "Thank you for your time, Commander. And thank you...for speaking freely."

 

"Gracie, she may be, in your view, something of a little sister to you and I fully respect that. But she is my life to me. I would sooner rip out my own heart then intentionally hurt her. But I do have one question for you..." He pauses slightly, wondering quite how to phrase this. He chooses to be as direct as she had been. "What would you have done if you thought I was an improper match for her?"

 

Lieutenant Allen chuckled. "I would have pointed that out to her long ago," she replied. "I'm confident I would have been able to persuade her to see things my way." She shook her head and smiled. "Commander, I never thought of you as an improper match for Debbie. But now that the two of you are planning a wedding, I felt it necessary to....make sure my initial impression was accurate."

 

The chief nurse drew a deep breath and looked Mr. Ridire in the eye. "Now I have a question for you. You weren't serious about a sexless marriage, were you?" She canted her head to the left and raised a brow. "Because if you were, I know for a fact Debbie has other plans."

 

He stifles a chuckle but it takes him a few seconds. "As I said....if she wanted to. And yes, I was fully serious in what I said...in the exact manner I said it in." He smirks then adds, "You think you're the only one who knows her intentions? I'm not that naive."

 

Again, Grace Allen chuckled. "No, I doubt you are," she quipped. "Again, thank you for allowing me to talk to you about this. I realize it's a very personal matter." She drew a deep breath and sighed. "Now I have to figure out a way to tell Debbie that I took it upon myself to discuss this with you."

 

He says bemusedly, "I'm afraid, Ms. Allen, that's your burden to bear. I'm not intending to talk to her about it..at least not until I know you have first. I have enough on my plate to discuss with her as is."

 

She stared at the Commander for a long moment. "Perhaps you wouldn't mind not mentioning at all," suggested Gracie. "For the time being at least."

 

He shrugs and smirks, "She won't hear it from me. You get to have that fun, like I said. While I get the fun of informing the Captain."

 

Lieutenant Allen frowned. "My condolences, Commander. I wish you the best of luck with that one. As for me telling Debbie about this conversation, I would prefer to wait until after.....the wedding." She took a step closer to the door. It swished open and Gracie stepped into the corridor. She turned once again to face her reluctant host. "Thank you, again," she said with a slight nod. "And thank you for your....discretion."