"Memories of a Haunted Mind"

[Avery Tynte 0]

Her soft and gentle hand traced its way along his cheek. Her lips caressed his with all the warmth and passion of a raging fire. He returned the kiss and swept her into his arms, smiling into her lips. “I love you.”

I love you the words bellowed in his mind like a thunderclap from the heavens. Avery looked up and saw those same hazel eyes that haunted his memory. Only now those eyes were filled with contempt instead of love.

The door swished shut on the closet in sickbay. “Naara, Miranda will be back any moment.” She smiled at his comment. “Hence why we are in a closet, love.” She draped her arm around his neck and kissed him passionately. He drew back only inches from her face and laid his forehead against hers. “How did someone like me end up with someone like you?” he half whispered.

 

Avery blinked back what few tears remained within his eyes. Now, on top of a horse in the middle of a “Grand Adventure” was neither the time nor place. But how could he not think about it. There she was, sitting not ten feet away atop her own stead. Only now she was cold as ice, her words stinging like daggers. It had been two weeks; but two weeks since what? Nothing had happened. No warning…not even a Dear John letter. Perhaps this would be easier if he could comprehend a reason…phantom a cause…

 

She laid her head against his chest smiling sweetly. He laid his hand on her arm, kissing the top of her head gently. Her hair felt smooth and soft against his lips, the smell of her exotic shampoo filling his nostrils. “I love you…”

 

There it was again…had she been leading him on then? Had she been playing with him as a cat plays with a mouse before devouring it? Perhaps he had grown boring to her fickle will and as a reward she know swallowed her mouse whole…heart and soul. She noticed him looking at her and glanced back, her lips curled into a tight smirk. Was she playing with her mouse now…

 

She sat at the table with a glass of red liquid in one hand the other supporting her head leaned against the glass table top. He walked into the quarters and stopped short. “Surprise,” she said with a slight smile. He walked over to the table. “You made dinner…” he said kissing her before taking his seat across from her. “Replicated is more like it…” she said as her full lips curled into a full smile.

Those same lips now spat nothing but needling remarks and snide comments towards him. Avery’s horse slowed a bit, his mind not focused on driving it on. He fell back, but only a few feet. Hot liquid stung his eyes and he reached up quickly to dispel it. His mind still reeled; it was still searching for a reason. Had he done something…had he said something…he looked down as the question he had been trying to avoid crept its way back in. Had she ever really loved him?

His search for answers had been futile. Every time he tried to contact her she simply ignored him. When things such as this brought them together she was not outright hostile towards him, but carefully avoided being alone with him; deflecting any questions with a quick joke or snide remark. She seemed to talk to and enjoy the presence of anyone but the man she had once proclaimed to love. The man who truly loved her.

 

With dinner over they sat across from each other talking for hours. The stars behind them stretched into warp lines as the hour stretched late. Still they remained together; talking, laughing… He had not opened up to anyone like this in a long time. He felt as if he could tell her anything, hoped she felt the same.

He had cared for her; hell he still did care for her. Not in the way he cared for a patient or a friend. This was, he sighed, had been something deeper…something realer. But now what was it? A lost love? Had it ever even been love? If it had all been an act it had been an elaborate one…but to what end? What possible reason could she have for deceiving him? Avery’s mind was filled with nothing but questions, his mind haunted by every word she had ever said. His dreams were recurring scenes that turned to nightmares as soon as he awoke.

But over all one word clutched at his mind, threatened to drag him under, drown him. One small word resounded over all others, blocking out everything until life was simply a blur of motion, a motley collection of sound. One word haunted his conscious mind as he woke and his unconscious as he slept.

Why?