Please stay off topic!

[Samantha_Kent 0]

Hmmm...I live in the DC area and I have *never* heard of that. Clearly I'm running in the wrong circles. :)

[Brian T. Riley 0]

I just read an internet article (really wish I hadn't now) on the Comcast site involving pedicures: Apparently, there is a new rage ongoing in the DC area. Pedicure customers who frequent this one spa are paying to stick their feet in water, so these really small Carp fishies can nibble away the dead skin of the feet for a natural pedicure.

 

So let me get this straight, I get to pay money to stick my feet in the water, and then just sit there as qausi-flesh eating Pirahna type fish nibble on my feet? Right.

 

I think I will pass. Indeed. ;-)

 

They pay for this? I had small fish nipping at my toes the last time I went camping in the Adirondacks. Maybe I could start a pedi-spa resort on that lake. Any venture capitalists out there want to take a chance?

[Aliana Lucindak 0]

They pay for this? I had small fish nipping at my toes the last time I went camping in the Adirondacks. Maybe I could start a pedi-spa resort on that lake. Any venture capitalists out there want to take a chance?

well, I am more of a socialist but it defiantly sounds interesting.

~Ali

[will_marx 0]

well, I am more of a socialist but it defiantly sounds interesting.

~Ali

 

I prefer being more of a Marxist

and putting my security clearance at risk with this joke

and that sounds far to bourgeoisie for even a socialist Ali.

[Samantha_Kent 0]

::rimshot::

[Brian T. Riley 0]

I prefer being more of a Marxist

and putting my security clearance at risk with this joke

and that sounds far to bourgeoisie for even a socialist Ali.

 

 

What is with the blacked out bar? Classified info? Has the NSA started censoring our posts as well? Did you threaten a high ranking political figure? :)

[Brian T. Riley 0]

On an entirely separate note...I am coming to the conclusion that I need a new quote in my signature.

[Aliana Lucindak 0]

On an entirely separate note...I am coming to the conclusion that I need a new quote in my signature.

I agree.

~Ali

[Aliana Lucindak 0]

I prefer being more of a Marxist

and putting my security clearance at risk with this joke

and that sounds far to bourgeoisie for even a socialist Ali.

I am not your average socialist.

~Ali

[will_marx 0]

What is with the blacked out bar? Classified info? Has the NSA started censoring our posts as well? Did you threaten a high ranking political figure? :)

 

No, it's a spoiler bar. You need to highlight the black bar to reveal what's beneath it.

[Brian T. Riley 0]

No, it's a spoiler bar. You need to highlight the black bar to reveal what's beneath it.

 

Well...thats anticlimatic.

[Travis Kroells 0]

I love this thread :)

[Aliana Lucindak 0]

So do I. And mister Marx. Why were you putting your clearance at risk? (curiosity girl.)

[Shane 0]

On an entirely separate note...I am coming to the conclusion that I need a new quote in my signature.

 

I think it's funny. It really describes the main plots of a lot of scifi shows, especially STG Atlantis.

 

On another note, Richard Dean Anderson is the man!

[Brian T. Riley 0]

See what you started, Eagle? Now this is going to get ridiculous.

[Sumo 0]

I am not your average socialist.

~Ali

 

 

if you were, you'd have to move Boulder Colorado =0)

[V'Roy 0]

0 x 1 = 0

 

0 x 2 = 0

 

Therefore 0 x 1 = 0 x 2

 

0/0 x 1 = 0/0 x 2

 

Therefore 1 = 2

[Samantha_Kent 0]

::slams V'Roy in the Math Brig::

[eagle 0]

And now for something totally different...ques the Monty Python Flying Circus music...and the Flying heads routine.

[TMir 0]

And now for something totally different...ques the Monty Python Flying Circus music...and the Flying heads routine.

 

Rule 6: There is NO...Rule 6!

[Aliana Lucindak 0]

Rule 6: There is NO...Rule 6!

Then that should not exist.

~Ali

[TMir 0]

Then that should not exist.

~Ali

 

Except that it comes from here

 

<h1 align="center">Bruces</h1>

From 'Monty Python Live at City Center'

 

About the Sketch:

This sketch not only appeared in the Flying Circus TV Show - Episode 22, but also on their album 'Monty Python Live at City Center' and performed live in the Movie - 'Live at the Hollywood Bowl'. It was also featured on other albums - 'The Monty Python Matching Tie and Handkerchief', 'The Monty Python Instant Record Collection (first version), 'Monty Python's Final Ripoff' and 'The Ultimate Monty Python Ripoff'. A shortened and different version was also performed on their live album 'Monty Python live at the Theatre Royal Drury Lane'.

The cast:

FIRST BRUCE Eric Idle SECOND BRUCE Graham Chapman THIRD BRUCE Michael Palin FOURTH BRUCE John Cleese MICHAEL Terry Jones

The sketch:

Second Bruce: G'day, Bruce! First Bruce: Oh, Hello Bruce!

 

Third Bruce: How are you Bruce?

 

First Bruce: A bit crook, Bruce.

 

Second Bruce: Where's Bruce?

 

First Bruce: He's not 'ere, Bruce.

 

Third Bruce: Blimey, it's hot in here, Bruce.

 

First Bruce: Hot enough to boil a monkey's bum!

 

Second Bruce: That's a strange expression, Bruce.

 

First Bruce: Well Bruce, I heard the Prime Minister use it. "It's hot enough to boil a monkey's bum in here, your Majesty," he said and she smiled quietly to herself.

 

Third Bruce: She's a good Sheila Bruce, and not at all stuck up.

 

Second Bruce: Here! Here's the boss-fellow now! - how are you bruce?

 

(Enter fourth Bruce with English person, Michael)

 

Fourth Bruce: 'Ow are you, Bruce?

 

First Bruce: G'day Bruce!

 

Fourth Bruce: Bruce.

 

Second Bruce: Hello Bruce.

 

Fourth Bruce: Bruce.

 

Third Bruce: How are you, Bruce?

 

Fourth Bruce: G'day Bruce.

 

Fourth Bruce: Gentleman, I'd like to introduce man from Pommeyland who is joinin' us this year in the philosophy department at the University of Walamaloo.

 

Everybruce: G'day!

 

Michael: Hello.

 

Fourth Bruce: Michael Baldwin, Bruce. Michael Baldwin, Bruce. Michael Baldwin, Bruce.

 

First Bruce: Is your name not Bruce?

 

Michael: No, it's Michael.

 

Second Bruce: That's going to cause a little confusion.

 

Third Bruce: Mind if we call you "Bruce" to keep it clear?

 

Fourth Bruce: Gentlemen, I think we better start the faculty meeting. Before we start, though, I'd like to ask the padre for a prayer.

 

First Bruce: Oh Lord, we beseech Thee, Amen!!

 

Everybruce: Amen!

 

Fourth Bruce: Crack tubes! (Sound of cans opening) Now I call upon Bruce to officially welcome Mr. Baldwin to the philosophy faculty.

 

Second Bruce: I'd like to welcome the pommey bastard to God's own Earth, and remind him that we don't like stuck-up sticky-beaks here.

 

Everybruce: Hear, hear! Well spoken, Bruce!

 

Fourth Bruce: Bruce here teaches classical philosophy, Bruce there teaches Haegelian philosophy, and Bruce here teaches logical positivism. And is also in charge of the sheep dip.

 

Third Bruce: What's New-Bruce going to teach?

 

Fourth Bruce: New-Bruce will be teaching political science, Machiavelli, Bentham, Locke, Hobbes, Sutcliffe, Bradman, Lindwall, Miller, Hassett, and Benaud.

 

Second Bruce: Those are all cricketers!

 

Fourth Bruce: Aww, spit!

 

Third Bruce: Hails of derisive laughter, Bruce!

 

Everybruce: Australia, Australia, Australia, Australia, we love you amen!

 

Fourth Bruce:Bruce: Crack tube! (Sound of cans opening) Any questions?

 

Second Bruce: New-Bruce, are you a Poofter?

 

Fourth Bruce: Are you a Poofter?

 

Michael: No!

 

Fourth Bruce: No. Right, I just want to remind you of the faculty rules: Rule One!

 

Everybruce: No Poofters!

 

Fourth Bruce: Rule Two, no member of the faculty is to maltreat the Abbos in any way at all -- if there's anybody watching. Rule Three?

 

Everybruce: No Poofters!!

 

Fourth Bruce: Rule Four, now this term, I don't want to catch anybody not drinking. Rule Five,

 

Everybruce: No Poofters!

 

Fourth Bruce: Rule Six, there is NO ... Rule Six. Rule Seven,

 

Everybruce: No Poofters!!

 

Fourth Bruce: Right, that concludes the readin' of the rules, Bruce.

 

First Bruce: This here's the wattle, the emblem of our land. You can stick it in a bottle, you can hold it in your hand.

 

Everybruce: Amen!

 

(NB: The Album versions continue with the Philosopher's song The TV version continues below....)

 

First Bruce: Right, let's get some Sheilas.

 

(An Aborigine bunts in with an enormous tray full of enormous steaks.)

 

Fourth Bruce: OK.

 

Second Bruce: Ah, elevenses.

 

Third Bruce: This should tide us over 'til lunchtime.

 

Second Bruce: Reckon so, Bruce.

 

First Bruce: Sydney Nolan! What's that! (points)

 

(Cut to dramatic close-up of Fourth Bruce's ear. Hold close-up. The superimposed arrow pointing to the ear.)

 

Voice Over: Number nine. The ear.

 

*****Album Version Continued******

 

(And now all four Bruces launch into the Philosopher's song)

 

Immanuel Kant was a real ######-ant who was very rarely stable.

Heideggar, Heideggar was a boozy beggar who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel.

And Whittgenstein was a beery swine who was just as sloshed as Schlegel.

There's nothing Nieizsche couldn't teach 'ya 'bout the raising of the wrist.

Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

John Stewart Mill, of his own free will, after half a pint of shanty was particularly ill.

Plato, they say, could stick it away, half a crate of whiskey every day!

Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,

And Hobbes was fond of his Dram.

And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart:

"I drink, therefore I am."

Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed;

A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he's pissed.

[Samantha_Kent 0]

I can sing that whole song from memory.

 

::WINS AT LIFE::

[TMir 0]

I can sing that whole song from memory.

 

::WINS AT LIFE::

 

Crack tubes! ::pops open a couple of bottles Castlemaine::

[V'Roy 0]

What would a dog actually do with a car if he caught one?