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Dumbass

Please stay off topic!

2,314 posts in this topic

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood??? :D :) :P

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Otherwise known as the Red Star Special of the Day.

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Remember when Saturday Night Live was actually funny?

 

Yeah you feel old now don't ya?

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"...it was explained to me by the writer is you hold two seashells like chopsticks, pull gently and scrape what’s left with the third. ..." - Sylvester Stallone

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Remember when Saturday Night Live was actually funny?

 

Yeah you feel old now don't ya?

 

That was a great way to make me feel old, Images. Thanks a lot. :D

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There are 12 inches in a ruler.

Queen Mary was a ruler.

Queen Mary was also a ship.

Ships sail in the ocean.

The oceans have fish.

The fish have fins.

The Finns fought the Russians.

The Russians are Red.

Fire Engines are always rushin'...

that's why fire engines are red!

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Mi ri mi sol mi sol la sol do, do mi do la re (sol la ti la sol); ti do di re ti do di re ti te la, ti do di re mi me re do; mi ri mi sol mi sol la sol do, mi mi re la do; do la do me re do la do ti la, mi mi mi mi do

 

That's the solfege for "When I'm Sixty Four"...enjoy

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is a Targ more desireable than an earth dog cause I think I may need a new pet soon!

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I just bought the Firefly DVDs for $20, and Band of Brothers for $30. It was a long while before I found them cheap enough, since I never pay full price for DVDs. But I finally have them. So for a few weeks I will live in a state of bliss.

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I just bought the Firefly DVDs for $20.

 

Good show!! Happy DVDing.

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One of my favorite questions:

 

Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

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Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

And why do we have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

And if teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? :D

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Have You ever seen a Cat Fish?

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And why do we have noses that run and feet that smell?

 

Because you don't wash your feet, you sicko.

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And why do we have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

And if teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? :blink:

 

 

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

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Have you ever seen a Paper Clip?

 

Have you ever seen a Book Mark?

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If the pope does his business in the woods and bears do too, who would win the battle for territory marking?

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If the pope does his business in the woods and bears do too, who would win the battle for territory marking?

 

Hm, seven foot grizzly/brown/black bear versus 5'-somethingish German pope? I'll have to lay odds on the bear to win. Especially if it's Mom, and he's between her and her cubs.

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I beg your pardon? The Pope has a bear on his coat of arms.

 

The bear's name is Gladly. You know, from that hymn "Gladly the cross-eyed bear".

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The bear's name is Gladly. You know, from that hymn "Gladly the cross-eyed bear".

 

Whoa, dumbass. Wow.

 

As the guy on Scrubs said "[dumbass] you better check on the captain of your brainship, because I think he is drunk at the helm"

 

To change the topic again heres a Hitchhikers Guide quote:

"So this is it. We're going to die."

 

"Yes...except...No! Wait a minute, what's this switch?"

 

"What? Where?"

 

"No, I was only fooling. We are going to die after all."

 

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So, Charles, you seem to be a bright one.

 

HolyGrail196.jpg

 

Answer me these questions three, ere the other side ye see:

 

What is your name?

 

What is your quest?

 

What is the Capital of Assyria?

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Blue! No, wait, I AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

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I helped a blind man to Sbarros today.

 

His walking stick struck me in the back of my leg and when I turned around to lay the smack down, I realized that I couldn't hit him. It wasn't because he was slightly mentally challenged or because he was shorter than me (which is very short). No, I knew that since he was blind, he wouldn't see my hand hurtling toward his face at mach ten. When you can't see the fear in someone's eyes, it just takes all the fun out of it.

 

So I took him by the arm and helped him to the end of the line. I mean, just because he was blind didn't mean he couldn't enjoy greasy, over-priced mall pizza just like the rest of those poor suckas.

 

I stayed long enough to make sure they weren't going to scam him into taking a really small piece before I left to enjoy my Sbarros.

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Just what is the point of computing Pi to the millionth digit?I mean.. does it REALLY matter? Couldn't we spend that money and time on something *useful*?

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