Ensign Van Roy's Personal Log

[Dumbass 0]

This crew is nuts.

 

To begin with, someone recently played a practical joke on Ensign Kroells.  I don't know the exact details, but apparently he ordered a bowl of chicken soup and discovered what he had been given was a bowl of Klingon bloodworms.  Granted if you want chicken soup you should expect chicken soup, but why did he turn down fresh bloodworms?!?  Bloodworms is good eatin, especially the crunchy ones!  Best of all, it doesn't taste like chicken the way everything else does.  :D

 

For my away mission aboard Freedom Station I had apparently been issued a defective tricorder. Since we beamed over unannounced I had the tricorder set on continuous scan to warn us of any life forms that might stumble upon us.  And who should stumble on us but the Poy Ambassador!  I had never met the ambassador before, but my friend in Security, Ensign Garnoopy, was right.  This guy was ugly!  At any rate, he snuck up on us without being detected by the tricorder.  I'll have to remember to complain to Supply about their defective equipment. :(

 

Commander Ridire advised me to not take the sneak-up too seriously, but he did it in a way I found insulting. He compared the Poy Ambassador to a Ferengi, implying that Ferengi are not to be trusted either.  I am part Ferengi on my

Romulan mother's side - which means that, unlike my Vulcan father, I do have emotions and I do hold grudges.  He made a retraction but it's one thing to criticize Ferengi methods of commerce (although they are effective - no such thing as a poor Ferengi) but to attack the Ferengi as a people was uncalled for. :D

 

After hearing from the Poy Ambassador that the medicine was "sugar water" we decided to have Dr. Matthews check it out.  Sure enough she remarked to me that the only person who could use the sample was Garnoopy.  I since discovered the Doc was referring to aspirin, not breath mints. :D

 

But most puzzling about my last shift was the absence of my good friend, the guy in the black and white striped shirt who mysteriously appears and lets everyone know when the duty shift is almost up.  He doesn't say very much except "Two minute warning!", but he says it with such authority it's almost like the Captain is saying it himself! :)

 

Ensign Van Roy