FstLtMcLean

“Dear Debbie” McLean’s Logs Lieutenant Commander George McLean Chief Engineer USS Reaent NCC-3345-G Dear Debbie, There are moments in every person’s life than can be described as monumental. Good or bad they make us into who we are, and shape us into who we are to become. This moment is monumental to me in that I am closing a chapter in my life so that I can pursue something less temporal. Two years ago I met an old family friend in my hometown of Kokomo, Indiana. He was a mild-mannered man; he kept to himself for the most part. Yet, there was something different about him. In his eyes burned such passion, such devotion. How could a man possess so much hope in his eyes? How was he not picked up and thrown down by life’s indiscriminating tribulations? I was a broken, bitter man. I was angry at the universe. The only solace I found was in my work. Even that could not keep me occupied. I have been reprimanded more times than I can count. Every potential opportunity to make my life better, more respectable, I chose to squander. Nothing mattered to me. I cared for no one and did not mind that they did not care for me. I felt no purpose. Still, this man’s eyes seem to burrow deep within me, unlocking the last bit of hope that I had saved for life’s end. At first, I tried to resist, selfishly trying to suppress my vulnerability. Even without words, though, he began to call it out from within me. And then I felt something like I had never felt before. I can only describe it as similar to the morning dew settling on the blades of grass overnight. Like a shower, I felt a wave of peace and assurance fall upon me. The sensation began to overwhelm me and my knees gave way. Then, like a mighty dam being unleashed, tears began to flow down my cheeks as I began to sob. I cried years of heartache, years of pains, and fears, and failures. I remember looking up at the old man, asking him why it was that I was crying. Then he spoke, so tenderly, and finally revealed the reason why he appeared so hopeful. He told me that I was feeling the burden of conviction. I was feeling the weight of my apathy towards life and the bad decisions I had made. He talked to me about right and about wrong and why all humans have this innate concept. He explained to me that the reason we feel bad for doing wrong things is not that we’ve broken some rule or that we’re afraid of the consequences. He told me that it’s because we’ve violated a higher law, one that is able to judge even the matters of the heart and conscience. I admit that I was skeptical at first. But then I remembered what I had just experienced. I could only explain it to him as a peace that surpassed my own understanding. Then he introduced me to the hope that he had found so many years ago. And as we knelt there, I felt like an enormous weight was just lifted from my shoulders. From that moment, I knew I was changed for the better. No longer did I struggle without a purpose, no longer did I dwell on my failures and fears. When you realize that your life is not your own and that your purpose is to live for someone else, your whole perspective on life can change. I’m not going back to the way I was Debbie. In fact, I want to tell everyone my story because if I can receive a second chance at reclaiming my life, then anyone can receive a second chance. This desire has lead me to make my decision to resign from Starfleet after 15 years of service. It was my intent to write this letter to you, to give you the explanation that you deserved. You’ve always had compassion for me, even when I deserved none. You’ve reached out to the unlovable and have even gotten burned by it a couple times. Never did that deter you. I want you to know that not only had have I grown to respect you, I’ve grown to consider you my friend. I’ve grown to love just who you are. The man that receives the honor to marry you someday, will be quite a man indeed. Remember me as I embark on this new path of my life. I do not know where it will take me, but I trust He who never fails. Love, George ---- Thank you all for a wonderful three years. It’s been a privilege to serve on the Reaent. Thank you to Captain Michaels especially whom, like Debbie, has been a good RL friend. Thank you also to Commander Ridire whose abilities continue to amaze. See you all on Thursday, one last time. -George’s Player

This is an incredible piece of writing, one of the best logs I've ever read. Great job Doctor. -McLean

I agree with Seiben. B)

How the Story Went McLean’s Logs 0510.17 It was a dark and stormy night. The Reaent, though not destroyed, drifted in shambles while George and Aaron escaped the firefight in their little pod. Up ahead was a small M class planet, but it really didn’t give much comfort. Most of the planet was covered with deserts, with a few places of sparse vegetation. The Eastern and Western Hemispheres were split by a large, mostly acidic ocean. This was not Risa. Aaron received the rendezvous coordinates and piloted the pod towards the planet’s atmosphere. The Command Staff had ordered all Reaent personnel to assemble at a specific location on the Southeast part of a peninsula on the Eastern Hemisphere. Once they arrived, they were supposed to implement emergency Away Team protocols, which included the need to erect shelter, scout out the area, setup medical facilities, and gather together all useful supplies. The protocols also included rations on food and water. After breaking the atmosphere Aaron directed the pod to the rendezvous location with relative ease. Despite the horror stories that George had been told about Aaron’s piloting abilities, he seemed to know what he was doing. Aaron landed the pod in the midst of several other evacuation vehicles and it appeared as if work had already begun. On the northwest part of the camp was a makeshift structure that George assumed was either for medical or for command. George climbed out of the pod and glanced around. Besides the few structures that were being worked on and the assorted escape pods, George noticed little else of interest. They were too far away from the shore to see the ocean and not near any significant mountain rises. George could see a little vegetation, though none of it looked appetizing. The climate was quite humid and the two suns easily brought the temperature over 100 degrees. Underneath his feet rested large granules of sand, typical of the rest of the planet. George immediately went to work on taking apart some of the escape pods in effort to use their engines. One of the primary responsibilities in a situation like this for Engineers is to ensure that the community has some sort of generator in which lights and various emergency apparatuses could be hooked to. The rest of the evening was spent doing such. As George lay down to sleep later on in the evening in a small tent, he finally had a chance to reflect on the day. There really was never a dull moment in Starfleet. Yet, despite all of the stresses of the day, he remained a peace. George could not imagine a better life for him. He was cleaned up, he had smarted up, and things were definitely looking up for him. George shuddered to think what his life would have been like had he not listened to the people that cared about him. Redemption was his life’s song.

Wait...you're telling me that they let a rabid dog command a starship? :(

Indeed! I've served on the Reaent for close to three years and I can tell ta, it's a great sim. Fred really does a good job with his mind-boggling plots. ^_^

::hands Ah-windu a tissue:: Your name is a sneeze.

This was Marish as a Freshman in the Academy... Don't ask where I found this file...but his name starts with a Deep and ends with a Throat. You'll never find out.... wait... darn!

“”It’s happening again” McLean’s Log Chief Engineer USS Reaent | NCC-3345-G 0505.28 “It’s happening again,” George thought as he stared down at Ensign La Touque. The scene outside eerily reminded him of a scene a little more than two years ago. A disfigured hull with all the signs of sabotage, George could imagine the bodies strewn across the decks, lifeless and scorched beyond recognition. Yes, it did remind him of the Cairo. Everybody was touched by the incident in some way, some more intimately than others. For George, the whole tragedy had disgusted him. If he had not had the pressure of maintaining his composure in front of his young impressionable officers, Keraz and Graham, he probably would have let his true feelings be known. How was this massacre going to change the Reaent crew? There was already a deep spirit of bitterness looming on board. Would bitterness be transformed into despair? At least these were Tholians and not humans right? As much as he tried not to sound xenophobic in his mind, he did conclude that this situation would not tug at the heart like the Cairo. George sighed. All of this pondering and complaining was not going to change what happened and did not bring them any closer to the truth of what happened. George began to ponder the facts. A Tholian vessel has been severely damaged by some sort of internal explosion, perhaps a bomb, perhaps something more complex rigged through Engineering. Perhaps, he was just thinking the worst. Maybe it was a major malfunction in the ship’s systems. He assumed that most, if not all, were dead on board, including an ambassador. The next task would be to determine what kind of chemicals were on the debris, whether they were elements normally found in bombs. “I don’t like mysteries,” George thought to himself, “someone always ends up dead.”

“One man’s joy, another’s sorrow, another’s horror” McLean’s Logs Chief Engineer USS Reaent | NCC-3345 0505.16 Was it luck? Had he just been lucky in escaping the misfortunes happening to the rest of the crew the last couple years? George sat on the bed in his quarters contemplating these realities. After a career of misconduct coupled with misfortunes, George felt that things were finally going his way. Yet, despite his unearthed peace and joy, he saw so many others hurting, vexed by circumstances he couldn’t understand. First there was Commander Ridire and Dr. Matthews. Commander Ridire had suffered so terribly since the incident on the USS Cairo, and as much as he suppressed his feelings, his expressions were still roughly painted on and the mask was crumbling. His bitterness seemed to squeeze out of every poor on his face. George felt sorry for the man. Life has a way of knocking most great men to their knees, and destroying a proud man if he resists succumbing to his fate. George could tell that Dr. Matthews tried all she could to help the broken man. He always admired the care in her eyes and the conviction that she performed her duties. After all he went through with her, he looked up to her. She was a woman with purpose and direction…something he still wanted to learn more of. Yet, George could sense that she too was carrying many burdens. Maybe it was the weight of the Commander’s struggle, maybe it was the rigor of everyday life aboard the Reaent. He couldn’t tell, but he felt for her. Then there was Captain Michaels. George often wondered if there was anything going on with his beloved Commanding Officer. The often serious countenance appeared to have soured in recent weeks. Was it personal…or was it professional? In any event, life did not seem to be treating Captain Michaels with the same amount of respect that he demanded out of his crew. Again, George wondered why he had been spared. Perhaps maybe his life was just as rough and he didn’t notice? Perhaps he had learned how to persevere. Connolly had taught him so much and he continued to grow in what he had told him and shown him. Hope had become more than a dream, it had become a lifestyle. Perhaps it was time to bring that message to others. But how do you bring hope to one who has none?

Down boy...down.

“Come Again Brian?” First Lieutenant George McLean Chief Engineer USS Reaent- NCC-3345-G “What’s this all about anyway Brian?” The question beat over and over in his head as he mulled over his recent discussion with Assistant Chief Medical Officer, Brian Smith. George had had his run-ins with Brian over the past couple of years. For example, there was that time when Captain Michaels, in a moment of disillusionment had transferred command to Brian, flabbergasting both Debbie Matthews and George. Nevertheless, Brian seemed to be a level-headed guy and George found that he could trust his medical expertise just as comparable to Dr. Matthews. What was it all about? George asked himself over and over again. Earlier he had cross-referenced the Engineers on board Reaent who were both female and had telepathic abilities. The results revealed three fairly reliable Engineers: Katlyn Fornadly, Sarah Clawson and Erin Jones. According to the description that Brian gave to George and Lieutenant Hickok, also present at the meeting, seemed to match Fornadly. What did he do? All George knew was that two men ended up in Sickbay with bad bruises over this woman. Sure she was known to be playful, but most of the singles on board acted this way. What else is there to do when you’re stuck on a ship for large periods of time? This was the way George had acted back in his twenties. Of course, he was beyond that now, but he still remembered those days. George felt himself wishing that he hadn’t sat through this meeting. The repercussions of such knowledge made him feel uneasy and he dreaded seeing Miss Fornadly for fear of giving himself away. She was a teep; she obviously would be able to tell if there was something wrong in George’s demeanor. What if she finds out that I know something I shouldn’t? George continued to worry as he learned over his console. Even as he was distracted with activity, he couldn’t stop thinking about a dreaded encounter with Fornadly that had the potential to produce unknown results. Yet, George’s worry was soon replaced with a greater worry. Alarms began blaring and within moments George knew what had happened. One of the probes that his team had prepared failed to launch and the detonator timer had already begun its 150 second countdown. “Mr. Marish…!” George yelled into his combadge.

None, McLean was just waiting for the proper moment. :D

Like everyone else has said, we're sorry that you had a bad experience. In all fairness though, every reply on this topic has been encouraging as if to say "hey, we're sorry you had a bad experience...but don't give up...sometimes it takes a few tries to get a hang of things." I'm proud of the way STSF members have responded, it speaks well of the community that we have here. :wacko: So...we hope that you choose to sim here again sometime and get to know some of the most awesome people on the planet. :D -McLean

Welcome aboard! :P