Alright, so I have two insane furry babies who are cats named Linus and Mandarin, and I have some additions for your adorable list that may make you laugh.
"I will not steal q-tips from the garbage and play with them for hours on end"?
"I will not walk across the hangers in the human's closet."
"I will not steal socks out of the hamper."
"I will begin to treat mom as more than just a piece of furniture that dispenses food"
"I will not hide under the couch whenever company comes over"
"I will not be rotten just so that I can go for a car-ride." (Yes, he loves carrides).
"I will not hiss at the veterinarian"
"I will not sleep in the dirty clothes in the laundry basket"
"I will not steal my brother's food."
"I will not walk across doorframes in the middle of the night."
"I will not beg to go outside so I can go to the other aparment and talk to the drunk guy that lives there. I understand that my mother feels that he isn't any good for me, and I must respect her wishes."
"I will not throw my brother out the window this year."
"I will learn that just because the door is closed does not mean that I have to be in that room. I suppose my humans can go to the bathroom by themselves without my assistance."
"I will not jump onto the top ledge of the shower and watch my humans bathe."
"I will not chew off the bottom of any more pieces of furniture because they make tantalizing places to hide once that piece of fabric is gone"
"Just because my brother is interested in something does not mean that I have to have it."
"I will begin to learn to share my toys"
As for how to deliver pills to dogs, my family has always used marshmallows and/or cheese :lol:
Alright.. that's all I have for now.