Joy

"Joy? You missed an attack on diplomats," insisted Crystal. "There was that automated vacuum cleaner that attacked Ambassador Drankum." "That was provoked," responded Joy with a smile. "Ambassador Drankum's table manners left much to be desired. Any respectable vacuum cleaner would have felt it necessary to take action. It was an affair of honor. The Vacuum may have lost the battle, but it died honorably." "We don't need to warn this Dabi fellow about vacuum cleaner honor?" "I think not."

Subject : Diplomatic Security Concerns From : Ambassador Joy Two, Federation Embassy, Aegis CC : Commander Chirakis, XO Aegis To : trJeth Dabi, Security Chief, Aegis Sir I am content with the current self security scheme, being accompanied at times of risk by my own people. With the Midway currently inactive, and no traffic other than from allied powers coming through, my personal evaluation of the risk is quite low, though I would take any alerts you would care to provide seriously. This might well change as the station becomes more actively involved with the rest of the sector. At the moment, we are barely interacting with the local powers at all. If one expects a spiral of political rhetoric to precede a spiral of violence, there has of yet been no real opportunity for either spiral to develop. In the past, the tension has actually been with station security wishing to place more guards on diplomatic personnel than the ambassadors found necessary or appropriate. It might not be considered honorable for an ambassador to find himself always surrounded by armed individuals loyal to other powers. I shall not be surprised if Ambassador Drankum goes with an 'as requested' scheme, as he has at times seemed irritated by the presence of guards. On the other hand, various prior security chiefs have taken their responsibilities quite seriously, as they should. I will also note that during my stays on station, diplomatic personnel have not been attacked, excepting one unfortunate incident between a Gorn courier and station personnel. On the other hand, there was an attack by an assassin -- likely acting on behalf of the Breen -- targeting the station XO. I find this understandable. It is easy and likely correct to interpret the military personnel as having more influence on station policy than the diplomatic. If one wishes to provoke the station, one might well get better results attempting to provoke the military personnel. But I shall await your input. Ambassador Joy Two

Subject: RE: ... I will take your concerns to the Rekkhai. If security is warranted in your areas, it will be provided as requested. I will inform you once it is clear to what extent they are willing to secure you. Daise'Dheso

Joint Log by Ambassador Joy and Hannah McDowell "Computer, freeze program." Hannah sat stoned faced as she watched the holo simulation finish. It was very real lookin and soundin and it gave her goose bumps. "So.... I had heard about the first station but watchin it blow up is altogether a different matter eh? "Entirely different," responded Joy. "To get a truer impression of what the Breen can do, one might watch it live, but.... Well. I'm assuming you have seen enough real trouble over the years that you can extrapolate well enough." Hannah nodded. "Aye, that I have. So these Breen have disappeared with not a clue to be found?" Hannah rose from her chair and paced slowly around the office. "I must say Ambassador, this concerns me greatly it does." Hannah turned and faced Joy. "It does not, however, deter me." "It shouldn't deter you. There is a risk, of course. We do not truly know the status of the Breen fleet, and I don't know that we are apt to know soon, or if you or I would be told if we did come to know. Still, while they twice sent fleets out since the Dominion War, both times the fleets were sent at Cardassia Prime. That is a worthy target for such a fleet. They are now one major power, while the Aegis Alliance is at its best five. Their opening move has always been a coup de main against Cardassia, to shift things from one on five to two on four. They certainly have had the power and opportunity to send a fleet in this direction, but they have never chosen to do so. I would not exclude the possibility of much smaller raids, single ships are the most likely, but major efforts would not be directed at a new colony, I think." Hannah nods in understanding. "Once upon a time Cardassia was rich in precious artifacts and minerals. As ye know they were mostly destroyed durin the war. It was a great loss to the archeological community." "As bad as that is and this holo simulation ye just showed me, I must go on to TKR-117. There might...." Hannah pauses for a second, reluctant. "There might be somethin of great importance on that planet. My staff doesn't know but I suspect........ based on some things they haven't seen......" Hannah sighs deeply. Ambassador, there might be an artifact on that planet. One that could answer some questions about a race long thought dead." "Long thought? Are you suggesting there may be prior sentient occupants present?" "No, no occupants now. Just some possible remnants of them." Hannah looks away and paces some more. "I wish I could say more." Joy leaned back, considering. "I won't press. Not yet. However, if your discovery should begin to tread on real security or diplomatic concerns, well, secrecy may not be the answer in the long term.". "Thank ye Ambassador." Hannah replies relieved. "If nothin is there, then we will be gone in a few months and back on earth. But iffn what I suspect is there, well, it won't be a secret for long." Joy blinked. "Hmm... It must be important, then. Colonial permits are not given out lightly. Your discovery drives you more than the opportunity to develop a Class M planet?" "Well it's a little small for a real community but mostly the dig drives us. The chance ta find a little history so to speak." "More than a little, I would think." .// "Well rest assured Ambassador, you'll be the second ta know iffn we find somethin." Hannah glances at her watch. "Blast, I need ta meet with the rest of the group and head ta medical. They won't let us leave until they check us out." "Very well," said Joy standing. "Just don't consider the Breen to be the only threat. There are any number of not so well developed worlds in the area, and stories of a Federation colonization kit sitting on a lightly defended world might tempt someone. Do you intend to have orbital sensor packages up?" Hannah slowly heads for the door. "Aye, we do. And Aegis is only a half a day away iffn we get into trouble." Joy walked with Hannah, intending to keep her company, at least to the embassy lobby. "Just be sure some of your sensors are pointing out, not down, and be sure we get word. I'm trying to put together information packages on local worlds, cultures, militaries, imports, exports and the rest. I'll forward them as I get things together." "I thank ye kindly Ambassador for all your help. I'm sure we'll be in contact soon enough." "I'm sure."

Subject : Re: Regarding TKR-117 From : Ambassador Joy Two To : Ambassador Drankum Classification : Secret Something you don't already know? If their archeology team doesn't find what they hope to find, the TKR 117 colony will close down? Everyone returns to Earth? That's the only big thing. Sorry if you knew it already. If you didn't, please talk to me before going to Doctor McDowell. Joy Two

Subject : TKR 117 From : Ambassador Joy Two To : Ambassador Drankum CC : Commander Chirakis I have been speaking with Doctor McDowell about setting up the colony. The schedule suggests a low manpower level at least for the first year plus, on the order of a dozen people. While we have talked about eventually building a colonial government and walked through assorted cultural concerns, for the time being the expedition will be more an extended scientific away team than a colony. While the embassy is researching and setting up for an eventual set up of a full scale planetary government, for the time being this would be overkill. There is an oddity in the set up. It does not seem at the moment to have security or military implications, but if you wish to hear paranoid concerns regarding strange internal Federation politics, let me know. For the time being, I would just expect the unexpected. Joy

Letting Hannah briefly enter her quarters and settle baggage, Joy stayed in the corridor and tapped her comm badge to cover something she hadn't anticipated at all. "Crystal?" "Yes, Joy?" "We missed religion. If a new colony doesn't come pre-equipped to interface with energy beings, how does one go about it? I suspect there will be no lack of organizations willing to jump in and explain how it is done. Could you look at the population mix of the new colony and quietly figure out who might appropriately receive invitations?" "Big hurry on this?" "I don't think so. Let's make quiet the far higher priority. I don't want to have anyone show up uninvited. Still, should the time come, let's have the options on file." "Got it, boss."

I'm concerned about this talk of "The Monster". Their sensors have to be awfully good if at this range they can positively identify Will. ;)

Subject : Political Status, Sky Harbor Aegis From : Ambassador Joy Seven To : Office of the Chair, the Federation Council <Begin forwarded message> Subject : Transcript From : Ambassador Joy Two, Sky Harbor Aegis To : Ambassador Joy Seven, Earth Once upon a time, M’lord Mudd became dissatisfied with last year’s class of androids, and resolved to create something better. For something new and different, he gave them hearts. After a time, when he needed some cash, he sold two of them to the Ferengi, but the Ferengi were dissatisfied. So they were changed again. Of course, the Federation was dissatisfied with the result. And you know... they were changed again. And now, I went to an artificial Vulcan for advice. I suppose I deserved what I got. And, you know, it isn’t bad advice. In the spirit of the eternal quest for the more perfect woman, there is much wisdom in what you say. It is right. It is proper. You should be congratulated on the wisdom of it. I should show deference. I should develop my sense of humor. I should behave with grace and class. I should remember male pride. I should not show passion in my beliefs, lest it be mistaken for bravado, and thus draw wrath. I doubt you know much of human women’s clothing? You wouldn’t know this outfit? It’s but a simple skirt and blouse. These were designed on Earth in the 1950s. The humans had bombs enough to destroy their civilization, but had not yet left the planet. It is my Princess Ann outfit. It’s from an old story, Roman Holiday. The diplomatic Joys wear it almost always. Putting it on calls up an old personality, a fantasy part my progenitor once played. The role was of a Princess, a diplomat of a sort, a public relations front woman. As the story opens, she is shown going about her business. Reviewing soldiers. Visiting public buildings. Working a reception line. Smiling. Always, smiling. Dancing with old men. Her posture was always correct. Her manners always perfect. Her feet hurt. When I try to walk in her shoes, my feet hurt. One may never let it show. After the grand diplomatic reception, you get to see who she really was without the beautiful ball gown. She likes to bounce on the bed. She likes cookies and milk before bed time. She isn’t happy with a beautiful embroidered nightgown. She wants pajamas. But she can’t bounce on the bed as they must review tomorrow’s schedule. She is to cut the ribbon at the factory. She is not to accept the car. No thank you. She is to accept the flowers. Thank you. She is to give speeches. Youth, and opportunity. Peace and good will. Cooperation among nations. She doesn’t like schedules. Schedules rule her life. They remind her that yesterday was much like today, and will be much like tomorrow. She throws quite a fit, that little princess. A princess in hysterics. A princess in tears. And, you know, that story is an odd story, a romantic and comic tragedy. The Princess can’t have love because she has duties. So, yes, you give wonderful advice. I shall walk in her shoes. I shall dance delicately. I shall work on my humor. Grace and class. Posture. Diction. I shall smile. I shall show deference. Yet how much more can I defer? I promised to support Drankum’s military and economic plans. God help me, I promised to support a program of military and economic expansion. I did it in hopes that I could continue making my little speeches. Youth and opportunity. Peace and good will. Cooperation among nations. After all this time, I still want to make the same damn speeches. I won’t accept the car. I will accept the flowers. But no one gives me flowers. I have a grand elaborate diplomatic palace, but it is empty. No one is here to hear. I sometimes think only my sisters believe in what I have to say, but now what I would say is classified. I should not bring my message even to them? It’s coming, you know. Conflict. Battle. War. Likely enough, I couldn’t stop it, anyway. Does any princess really matter when King Phaser sits upon the Latinum Throne? Once upon a time they let me mouth the words. The people liked to hear them. Have the words now become the enemy? Is it now so important that they not be spoken? Could I have stopped it? I don’t know. I doubt it. I would have liked to have been able to try. Deference? Remember his pride? Humor? Avoid seeming bombastic? Do not seem to care, to strive for my beliefs? Grace always? Class? But my heart is programmed to be broken. Even Princess Ann on occasion needs to scream. Even Princess Ann cries. <End forwarded message>

Crystal thumbed the selector on her cricket to stun, and cautiously entered the embassy lobby. No fire fight. No bad guys. Just Bruce, at his desk, poking heavily on his screen. “What’s the alert?” Bruce glanced back at Crystal, briefly, and kept working. “Not a physical threat. Cyber alarm. Denial of service attack, and not a very effective one at that. We have large number of replicator orders coming in. It’s making a dent in subspace data transfer rates. Embassy replicator resources will get stressed if we don’t block it. You could conceivably get a bit hungry. If one extrapolates a continued attack, we would blow our replicator bio mass budget.” Crystal put away her cricket. “I’m watching my weight, but that’s ridiculous.” “Diverse origin points. Mostly Earth. New York City. The Presidio complex. One from Haven.” “That doesn’t sound like an attack.” “Hmm.... You’re right. Not unless we’ve done something to tick off Professor Moriarty and Ambassador Rhybalt. A lot of them are coming through trusted sources.” “Which?” Bruce probed. “Florists Transworld Delivery?” “Oh,” said Crystal, after a brief pause. “Not an attack. Translate the files from physical replication to holo projection, and route to Joy’s office.” “Not an attack?” Crystal sighed. “Joy is having a bad day. She complained that no one is listening... and no one gives her flowers.”

It was odd. Since returning to Aegis under Captain Muon, Joy had been working nothing but Federation business. Oh, she had flown the Mudd flag in the lobby, along side the Federation flag, but nothing at all had come up reflecting the interests of Mudd, androids or any other form of artificial intelligence. Then, as soon as she furled the Mudd flag and put it away... He was not Sorehl. He was a knowledge base with a fancy 3D natural language interface. The personality matrix was based on a Vulcan pattern. There was little to no emotion. Therefor no motive, no purpose, nothing that was apt to snowball a primitive personality into becoming a complete one. Joy’s Sister Six was among those who wrote guidelines that should prevent accidental sentience. It should not happen if the guidelines were followed. Of course, it happened anyway, guidelines or no. Program a powerful enough machine to solve a complex enough problem and odd things happened. If one designs an artificial being to perform a given function, one owes that being the opportunity to perform that function. And now, someone had gone and created an entity designed to help one interface with Ferengi commanders. Did she really want to put the poor thing between herself and Drankum? Is that a responsible fate for any sort of being, organic or artificial, sentient or not? “Let me vent for a bit,” Joy started, addressing the knowledge base. “Please. Sit down. I suspect I’m working from a perspective you are not programmed to handle, but let me work it through, anyway. It might not be a satisfactory approach, but then you might propose an alternate one. “I would agree Drankum would have a pride in his people and feel a need to defend his culture, but I would expect that of any Ambassador. It’s part of the job description. If one is insulted or if one’s people, culture or government is insulted, one is expected to respond, at least if the insult comes from another supposed professional. One should generally acknowledge less official demonstrations while maintaining respect and dignity. I have seen this from many members of many diplomatic corps. Pride in one’s people is not particularly uniquely strong among the Ferengi. The Ambassadors representing Earth, in my opinion, were far worse even than Drankum in that respect.” She checked herself. No need to rant on that subject. “I have worked with Captain Muon and a few other Ferengi ambassadors. Only with Drankum has this exaggerated pride become a problem, and even with him it does not seem clear it is the center of the problem. “I would agree that Ferengi in my experience usually react reasonably to the tone set by others. This was true of Muon and the two ambassadors I met on Earth. Drankum is the exception. His tone is habitually abusive and insulting. Any idea not his own is generally rejected. His own approaches are presented as by ultimatum with no intent to listen or negotiate. It is exceedingly difficult to get him to exchange ideas with others as equals. That is not his way. “I would agree Drankum reacts strongly to bravado, to conflicts over ego and status. He takes offense easily, gives offense habitually, with no sense of proportion or balance between. In this he is totally unlike other Ferengi I have dealt with at a professional level. “To be clear, I have never required a tutorial program to deal with a Ferengi before. The problem as I perceive it is not with Ferengi culture, but with how Drankum deviates from the norm I have come to expect from a Ferengi professional, or from any diplomatic professional. He reminds me far less of the Ferengi I dealt with quite well on Earth than he reminds me of a racist stand up comic who gets laughs by playing to crude insulting degrading stereotypes. “I generally feel it my duty to respond to insults given. Racial slurs, sexual harassment, flatulence as communication, and habitual crude insult is not typical of the Ferengi I have dealt with in the past, and it is not acceptable as part of Diplomatic exchange unless one is deliberately attempting to create interstellar hostility. Again, I have never encountered such behavior from any other Ferengi, nor from anyone else who carries diplomatic credentials. “Before the 14(7) incident I for the most part ignored this behavior, and quietly felt a great deal of contempt towards Drankum as an individual. This was in no way a contempt for the Ferengi people or the Ferengi culture. The contempt was based on how radically he deviates from the norm I had come to expect of the Ferengi. I treated him as a restaurant owner with pretensions of being a stand up comic. “With the 14(7) incident, he misread the treaty entirely, nearly destroyed the Aegis Alliance, and nearly brought the Alpha Quadrant to war. It is no longer possible to ignore him. He has chosen to play the Great Game. If he intends to play, he had best know the rules, and develop some feeling that there are consequences for violating them. “There is a price for violating treaty. There is a price for giving insult. There is a price for disregarding duty. There is a price for flaunting protocol. If he wishes to play the Great Game, he cannot pretend that he is too stupid or too undisciplined to understand the role he has accepted. He cannot pretend that behaving like a jerk will result in him getting any sort of free ride from alien militaries or diplomats. “And, frankly, it is in everybody’s interest that he get his realty check butting heads with me rather than while transforming a partially open sector of space. I have a foam titanium skull. I can butt heads with him at it as long as he would care to. If he can learn to perform to professional standards against me, he might possibly be ready to do his job. “In short, if he wants respect, he can honor interstellar protocol and perform his duties. His being a Ferengi does not excuse him from these things. No amount of flatulence, insult, harassment or hiding behind his race is going to help him, not as far as I am concerned. He shouldn’t expect the naked stars to be impressed either. “Comment?”

There was a pause. Joy suspected she knew the problem. The holo-Sorehl was programmed to create and maintain a proper crew-captain relationship. The ambassador-ambassador relationship was something entirely different. She decided to continue. “It is not, of course, all on the Ferengi and Drankum side. There is also the Mudd and Joy side. You know a great deal of the Ferengi, I suspect. It might be prudent to consider the other half of the problem. The good news is that from my perspective there have been successes. I’m just not sure how to extend them. The bad news is in the nature of the failures. I am not sure it is proper to continue to use the successful approach. “Sexual harassment. I am forbidden, at Priority Five, to draw sexual attention or interest. It feeds back into the emotion chip as humiliation. Drankum... flirts. Most males, on seeing a little flaring of the red facial diodes, hearing a suggestion that sexual attention is not desired, will back off. With Drankum, that wasn’t sufficient. In time, when he persisted, I had to respond with instructions for a half dozen Alyce class androids to attempt to deplete his semen reserves. The Alyces do not share my Priority Five. In fact, M’Lord Mudd designed them specifically for depletion of semen reserves. Eventually, the undesired sexual advances followed by Alycian counter charges stopped. From my perspective, this was a success. “My processor design is called ‘hedonistic-slave.’ I am designed to take pleasure from obeying orders. Many in AI circles believe this approach is immoral, that sentient beings should not be compelled to take orders from other sentient beings. This may be so. On the other hand, it has been demonstrated that most hedonistic-slave intelligences will come to the conclusion that their own programming is the best of all possible programming. It seems to me that I have a place in the galaxy, and it is a proper place. “But obedience is only one of six Joy class Priorities. It can be demonstrated that if the core values of an android’s supervisor are not highly consistent with the programming of the slave, emotion chip instability results. In other words, the slave has to have a high respect for the master, or the relationship becomes unsatisfactory at many levels. “I do not have a high respect for Drankum. I do not believe I should be his slave. I shall take all due steps to prevent any such relationship. This should not be difficult, as ambassadors, by the usual protocol, ought not to be giving orders or ultimatums to each other until and unless their respective nations are well into the ‘unfriendly acts’ stage. “Yet, Drankum recently attempted to maneuver to place me in a subservient position. Frankly, this is not going to happen. I don’t know that arguments of law or protocol would have moved him. However, the possibility I might sit on a whoopee cushion each time the proposal is forwarded may have produced movement. “Like the semen depletion strategy, the way to communicate with Drankum seems to be through dirty jokes with an underlying threat of ongoing humiliation. He enjoys humiliating others with his ‘witty’ approach to personal interaction, but he does not seem so comfortable being on the receiving end. “A deeper problem is that the Mudd androids are a hive mind race. Our government has been described as a wide area network. In some ways, we are not unlike the Borg collective. There is an assumption within the hive mind that one cannot make good decisions without good information. If one requires data to make a decision, one requests it and gets it. That is simply how things are done. We have difficulty conceiving how things should be otherwise. “Drankum seems interested in information control. He seems interested in not letting others know what he is doing. One of our basic differences is that I believe the diplomatic corps has to know the local situation in order to perform their jobs, while he seems to want to operate in secrecy. It seems this penchant for secrecy and control is a personal trait of Drankum in particular, rather than the Ferengi in general. Mudd androids, at least, have not had that particular problem with other Ferengi, though we have had the problem intermittently with individuals of other races.” Joy hesitated, but decided not to side track her monologue, omitting a discussion of the tricky Romulan balance between intrigue and honor. “At any rate, Drankum recently attempted to forbid me from communicating with my sisters. Again, no way. One might as well forbid a Vulcan logic, or a Klingon honor. Eight is coming to the station. We are going to merge data bases. After that, she will know this station and the issues surrounding it precisely as well as I. In time, Eight will return to Earth, and Seven will be as knowledgeable of Aegis as I, not to mention Three, Six, and Eleven, who are also on Earth and who share data bases with Seven quite frequently. “I defended this information sharing using an argument based on diplomatic protocol. Drankum does not have the authority to block diplomatic communications. However, I could not come up with a joke. I could not come up with a way to make the confrontation funny, to put in place an ongoing threat of humiliation if he continued the confrontation. Thus, I am not at all confident that the issue of hive mind against secrecy has been resolved. Drankum is highly egotistical. It seems one has to confront his pride to get him to change a position, but one has to do so using the same sort of humor he uses to attack the pride of others. If one plays the game by his rules, he can hardly complain about it, though I do not believe he particularly enjoys being on the receiving end. “One other issue is the word ‘robot.’ To the people of Mudd, this implies clumsy construction and a lack of sentience. On Earth, the Council runs under a formal set of Rules of Order. There was a time when Ambassador Seven was habitually called ‘robot’ by the opposition, to the point she regularly invoked ‘point of order, decorum’ each time the word was used. The offending ambassador would have to either apologize for using the word, or leave the chamber. Seven was willing to bring all Council activity to a halt over the issue. “Thus, it is the position of Mudd that ‘robot’ is an ethnic slur. It has become a matter of precedent and consistency. If Seven didn’t back down on Earth, I can’t back down here. In some ways this might seem a silly stupid issue, but respect between peoples is really not at core silly or stupid. “I can’t figure out how to turn it into a joke. Habitually insulting other ambassadors is not funny. I have considered finding or creating an appropriate ethnic slur to humiliate Drankum, and use it on a this for that basis in response to robot. This doesn’t seem dignified, however. If my stand is that ethnic slurs should not be used, I should not use them either. And yet, I have no reason to believe that Drankum will back down to protocol or requests for civility. He seems to respond only to not so subtle threats of ongoing humiliation. “I would like to find another approach. I would rather not be dragged down to interacting with him at his own level. To date, potty humor seems to be the most effective tool available. My progenitor worked a good deal with comedy, but it was a more sophisticated comedy than Drankum’s. She maintained a good deal of grace and class. I would vastly prefer to maintain some shadow of her example. I would prefer to find another way.” “One might also say that Drankum can be stubborn. We could talk about whether Ferengi are or more or less stubborn than other races. We could talk about Ambassadors being required to stand firm to national interests and values. We could discuss the distinction between the vice of being stubborn and the virtue of being principled, assuming there is a distinction other than perspective. “However, somewhere far beyond stubborn, or principled, is ‘lacks free will.’ However stubborn or principled Drankum or the Ferengi might or might not be, Mudd androids are more so. We are designed to follow our Priorities. This might possibly be mistaken for bravado, but it is something else. It is either a feature or a bug. One might argue which in the Journal of Artificial Intelligence, but feature or bug, it is my nature, and is part of the problem we are dealing with. “The Joy class is also not as unfamiliar with Ferengi culture as some might suppose. For several decades after my sisters Four and Seven left Mudd, they were with the Charador pirates operating under a four Law asimov processor priority set. Obey your owner. Maximize his profits, minimize his loss. Honor the Laws of Acquisition. Personify the Art of Oo-Mox. “Now, the Ferengi pirate era is way past its peak. The pirate subculture quite naturally drew more than its share of attention from other races. It never really represented the main line of Ferengi civilization. Still, we Joys continue running under Priorities imposed by the Federation in response to Red Four’s and Black Seven’s behavior under Ferengi programming. There is a reason we reject illegal orders. There is a reason we cannot kill or injure save under strict military chain of command. There is a reason we are denied opportunity to show and accept affection. There is a reason the feedback levels from our asimov processors to our emotion chips are set so high that that the phrase ‘lacks free will’ applies. There is a reason some of our Priorities are in some respects polar opposites of Ferengi values. “It is not easy to be reprogrammed. It is not easy to have one’s values crisply removed, and have them replaced with something totally different. When confronted with a problem just after reprogramming, one remembers old solutions. In our case, the old solutions would so often involve a gentle caress, or a closed fist. One’s memories would say these methods work, but the emotion chip rejects them with waves of horror and shame. For years this unit spoke of itself only in third person neutral gender. It was a denial of sentience. It was intended less to fool others than to fool ourselves. We were never intended to make moral choices. Our memories contained no guide to moral choices. Yet moral we were forced to become. It was a long hard road. It is not a road I would ask another to walk. If you wonder why Professor Six champions the right of Moriarty’s ruffians and rogues to be themselves, it is because we feel no sentient being should be blatantly mind wiped and transformed. “Yet having walked that road, we cannot walk back, my sisters and I. By all the shame and all the misery of all those years, we cannot return to what we once were. I am not sure you can understand the concept of a false priority, an unintended personality trait that can at times can over ride even the asimov processor. You are based on a Vulcan pattern, and false priorities are a thing of the emotion chip, or perhaps mine comes from background personality traits gifted me by a long dead actress. Beyond law, beyond protocol, beyond stubbornness, beyond principle, beyond Priorities, there is something irrational and primal that came out of those years. It is not a thing of logic, but comes from an urge to flee old nightmares, or, perhaps, after running so long, perhaps it is time to turn and confront old nightmares, however fair or unfair this might be to the individual standing in for the nightmare in question. “Drankum does not own me. He shall never own me. He shall never touch me. He shall treat me with respect.”

Subject : Technical Questions From : Ambassador Joy Two To : Centurion Jorahl CC : Ambassador Drankum Commander Brown Jorahl I know you are quite busy. It is unreasonable for me to ask for the detailed technical studies that would be required to answer some of the following questions definitively. I am also focusing much of my time on the colony project rather than the shipyard project. I find it unlikely that I shall be meddling much in your side of things. However, a few questions have come to mind, and I'd like an opinion as to whether they seem plausible, or whether politics might rear its ugly head. I understand that the technology mix on the new ships will involve both Federation and Romulan design and technology. For the most part, this ought to remain in the domain of the engineers. The further the politicians stay from design decisions, the better the ship is apt to be. However, I am curious as to whether cloak and singularity drive power technologies are in the proposed mix. If they are, I believe I may exchange notes with Ambassador tr'Aeolix. My sisters and I have had difficulties with the cloak treaty many times in our careers. If it is going to raise its ugly head again, we might as well get started on it. I have no strong opinion on how things should be resolved, but political processes can be slow. If approvals are needed, we might wish to start working it early. I do, confess, however, that a cloak equipped ship usable to probe Breen space would be convenient. Even if the Federation might continue to be denied cloaks, need the Aegis Alliance be so restricted? What combination of ship registry and crew make up would satisfy your government and the treaty? Anyway, that might be my headache and tr'Aeolix's, rather than yours. If you have comment, however, I'd like to hear it. I also had a brief discussion with Doctor McKinny. It seems that she has opinions on the design of sickbays. During this discussion, it occurred to me that I had opinions on the design of diplomatic suites. How thrilled are you at the prospect of a hoard of amateur starship designers swamping engineering with somewhat valid opinions? I shall refrain from speaking unless asked, but you might want to consider a format where advice on various specialty subjects might be reasonably reviewed. As I may become associated with the new colony, a thought occurred to me regarding the Local Orbital Space Defense Grid. The full grid placed around Aegis seems solid against any threat short of a large effort by a major power. The new colony will be entirely undefended save by the Aegis mobile assets which will be in short supply. Would it be plausible to move some small number of defense grid nodes to the colony, sufficient to deter minor raids, without significantly impacting our own defenses? Would it be difficult to build new defense grid nodes at our proposed shipyards? I am no finance master, but it seems to me that purchasing fixed fortifications designed to counter minor raids might be a profitable possibility. The local planets likely need defenses from raider groups more than they need the ability to project power away from their home worlds. I would think that without the expenses involved in faster than light drives, defense nodes would be more cost effective for local needs. Thus, there might be a greater need and larger market for nodes than ships. The smaller size of the units might make ramp up to production easier as well. I would like a quick opinion on technical feasibility if you could. Longer discussions of the military, political and economic ramifications would have to follow, I'm sure. If you know of a technical reason such approaches would be unfeasible, however, I'd like to hear that early so as not to muddy political waters unnecessarily. Thank you for your time. Ambassador Joy Two

Subject : Bureaucracy in Action From : Ambassador Joy Two To : Commander Brown Ugh This would seem to be Starfleet business, rather than embassy business, but has someone asked whether the shipyard would be an 'addition of evolutionary capability' to Aegis? If so, are the notifications, studies and approvals required by Article 14 of the Aegis Treaty being worked? Sorry to annoy, but recent events have left me with an Article 14 obsession. Until Amendment 3 is passed, any violation of Article 14 could destroy the Aegis Alliance. I do not intend to make a habit of contacting you without copying Ambassador Drankum. It's just that he and I have a wee bit of a history on this one. Let me know if I could be of service supporting this. I'm sure Crystal will be just thrilled by the opportunity to expedite bureaucracy. Ugh Ambassador Joy Two

Subject : Ferengi Cardassia Relations From : Ambassador Joy Two, Aegis To : Ambassador shiKatsu Raumk, Federation Embassy, Cardassia Prime Classification : Secret Encryption : UFP39D Ambassador Aegis is resettling into our new location reasonably well. Thus far, there have been no incedents beyond the stresses involved in changing both commanders and deployment area. We are close to being operational. Trade is still next to nothing, though this may be because no one knows that we are here. I am writing about a concern that I hope might be trivial, but I'd like you to be aware of. In evaluating the military threats to Aegis, I suggested that the only local power that seemed a threat was the Breen. Ambassador Drankum corrected me with mention of a second threat. Cardassia. One thread of the recent 14(7) crisis was a belief by the Ferengi that Cardassia was not yet sufficiently rehabilitated after the Dominion war. There were suggestions by the Ferengi that one of the major functions of Aegis was to monitor and deter military action by Cardassia. The Sorehl report suggested this need was dated, that the time for occupation was over. With the exception of the Ferengi, the other participating Aegis powers agreed. I suggested to Ambassador Drankum and Kith Ghemor a compromise as part of the post 14(7) crisis stand down. Ferengi ships should be allowed to continue servicing the economic projects the Ferengi developed during the reconstruction period. As Ferengi trade ships are also militia warships. This would give them opportunity to monitor military developments in the Cardassia Prime system. This monitoring capability would be the equivalent of the continued presence of Aegis. On the other hand, a few trade ships would not be the overwhelming military threat that Aegis represented. I believe this arrangement is quietly happening. At least, to your knowledge, has there been any attempt to exclude Ferengi ships from Cardassia? But the primary reason for this note is that I'd like to be kept aware of any developing tensions between Cardassia and the Ferengi. Is it just Ambassador Drankum who is still fighting the Dominion War in his mind? Do you see any evidence of deeper tensions? Did the Ferengi invasion fleet create lasting tensions? Did the Federation and Romulan support of Cardassia and departure of Aegis result in continuing good will? By all means please avoid fanning any fires, but I'm mildly concerned. Thus far, other than that one comment in passing, I have seen no evidence that the policies of Aegis are being slanted in any way detrimental to the Cardassians. I would just like to confirm tensions are fading rather than growing. Ambassador Joy Two

Subject : Altered Flight Plan From : Ambassador Joy Two, Aegis To : Ambassador Joy Eight, MMS Mudd CC : Ambassador Joy Seven, Earth Classification : None Encryption : Joy0208: B53AC338, Joy0207: A7439CAE Sister, mine As you have no doubt deduced, Ambassador Drankum and I are not quite in total accord. I believe we are circling around an acceptable position, but this likely isn't the ideal time for you to show up and 'politely request' docking clearance. I'd like a bit more time for things to simmer down, and the last point raised is that he couldn't say no. You might use the time constructively. There is a Federation member world Kobheeria nearby. I propose you do a one planet baby kissing tour. Information on the local planets is somewhat short. I'd like you to visit embassies, attend cultural events, copy news feeds, get as much information as you can from the local data bases at the Federation embassy, and perhaps wrangle invitations to visit other local worlds. I've no agenda beyond that discussed in earlier notes. Avoid committing anyone to anything, but listen. I'd just like a few doors opened and a better understanding of local affairs. I have also been informed that the colony at TKR 117 has been authorized to begin operations. I'd like you to visit there as well. It is proposed that I may play a role in representing them in some manner. Consider yourself to be my designated representative, but that my position is as yet not confirmed, nor have I been adequately briefed. I do not know if they currently have a party on the surface, but if there is a baby down there, try to kiss it. If no one is there, or you otherwise can't get permission to beam down, could you just do a routine orbital survey? I have absolutely nothing on planet or the culture of the colonists. Keep me informed. If I get good info on TKR 117 before you get there, I might cancel that aspect of your trip. That's about it, excepting an unofficial protest from the House of Rhee. Crystal is not pleased that the delivery of her augmented wardrobe has been delayed. If good relations with Haven are to be maintained, you might not wish to spend too much time at this. Ambassador Joy Two

"I have been considering the new lettering over the lobby," said Crystal. "Just plain The United Federation of Planets seem boring. I know you don't want to push Mudd too far forward, Joy, but I think we need something more." Joy raised an eyebrow. "You have something in mind, I assume?" "I thought we ought to list all of our planets. Thus, in smaller text, underneath, Haven, Earth and Mudd." Joy pretended to consider. Bruce jumped in. "Wouldn't it be better to list them in terms of the seniority of the planets in the Federation? Earth, Haven, Mudd?" "Or in terms of the ranking within the staff," suggested Joy. "Mudd, Haven, Earth." "A compromise?" suggested Bruce. "Alphabetical order? Earth, Haven, Mudd?" Crystal made her subjective argument. "It just doesn't have the same ring! It should be Haven, Earth and Mudd. Poetically speaking." "We could settle this amiably," suggested Bruce with a grin. "Fist fight?" "Fashion contest," Crystal suggested, insistently. "Children... children..." Joy rapped on the table for order. "Let's just leave it at The United Federation of Planets... but Haven, Earth and Mudd could be an unofficial motto." "One silly question, Joy," commented Crystal. "Why is it important now, all of a sudden?" "I'm not sure it is," Joy answered. "Those who were inclined to listen listened anyway, no matter the sign on the door."

OOC: Joy's response to the above (and a duplicate posting of the above) is found in the Kissing Babies thread.

Subject : Kissing Babies and Briefing Colonists From : Ambassador Joy Two To : Ambassador Drankum CC : Aegis Advisory Committee Aegis Diplomatic Corps Commander Brown, Aegis Ambassador Joy Seven, Earth Ambassador Joy Eight, MMS Mudd Ambassador I have been reviewing with my assistants Crystal and Bruce the Aegis shipyard and local colony projects. We also discussed a new concern. In addition to wondering if you think you own the station, we have started to become concerned that you may think you own me. We spent some time considering how you might have responded had a Federation station commander tried telling you what flags to fly in your embassy, what your job title ought to be, what your job function should have become, or otherwise taken control of your life. There was a thought that I might properly respond as we thought you might respond.... but there was a technical difficulty due to my inability to produce what seemed the most appropriate answer to your sudden interest in my professional life. Fortunately, Crystal was aware of this wonderful device, the whoopee cushion. Such a device should allow me to solve my native inability to communicate my feelings effectively. We also reviewed the message we were considering delivering to local planets in the ‘baby kissing’ get acquainted tour. Originally, we were thinking the message might be ‘we have come in peace, not to worry.’ We are now going to have to work with ‘we have come to build warships and seize territory.’ This is perhaps not the ideal message. I don’t think we ought to try to sugar coat it too much. We are here. We are here in force. We didn’t ask before we came. We aren’t intending to leave. That seems to be the way it is, and it we wouldn’t fool anyone trying to say otherwise. Still, I would like to know if any additional expansion is intended in the short term. It could be spun in a positive way. This area has not prospered to a great degree due to its nearness to the Breen. We could sell as a good thing that the major Alpha Quad powers are putting a roadblock between the local powers and the Breen. We could talk about trade opportunity and technology exchange. I think it could be sold to most of the local powers. I would still like to send Eight out in an attempt introduce ourselves. If you think I have much to do here, and would prefer that I not make that trip, I can assure you that Joy Eight is precisely as capable as I am. If I am to warn the leaders of the new colony of the risks they are soon to face, I would like to confirm that my appraisal of the situation is shared by Starfleet. I summarized this in my last note to you. Basically, Aegis was built to defend the home planet of a major empire. Using it to defend a station and a modest shipyard seems overkill. A rational enemy commander would weigh the losses likely to be taken against the relatively small loss of capability to the alliance, and would be not likely to attack. Of course, expecting enemies to be rational would not be rational. In addition, most local powers are struggling to maintain minimal merchant capability. With the notable exception of the Breen, the military threats capable of challenging Aegis seem few and distant. Even the Breen status is questionable given the evidence of difficulties with their temporal shield technology. Still, we have to assume that the Breen may still have a formidable threat. We would need considerable warning to summon major reinforcing fleets if we were to defend against an all out Breen attack. Getting such warning might require deep scouting or scanning of Breen territory. I am not briefed that such an effort is ongoing. While Aegis has formidable defenses, the new colony will not. And yet, the new colony will be associated with Aegis. I am concerned that if Aegis does anything to anger any local power, the prudent move for the local commanders would be to attack the colony, not Aegis. This is a risk I intend to make clear to the colonists. I would also confirm that you intend to maintain good relations with the local powers, and that colony defense is not a low priority when you consider how to deploy our very limited mobile assets. If I am to be some sort of liaison between Aegis and the colony, I will need to be kept regularly briefed on the high level military situation. In the past, a symbol of whether Starfleet intends to cooperate with the diplomatic corps is whether we get the tactical overview feed sent from Ops during alerts. I requested but did not receive this feed during the recent drill. I asked both you and Ops whether this feed denial was oversight or the new policy. I received no answer from either of you. If the diplomatic wing is to be used at all, the other ambassadors are apt to have projects similar to my liaison work with the new colony or the baby kissing tour. If Starfleet is not willing to cooperate with the diplomatic corps, there is nothing useful they can do here. I would like your assurances that you do intend to be cooperative, rather than obstructionist. In my experience, even brand new Federation colonies have unique cultures. The colonists often have unique and unusual philosophical, racial, economic or religious motivations. I would expect that any group willing to settle on the Breen frontier would be neither bland or retiring. They will have character. They are apt to be no more submissive or retiring than you or I. If you could, I would please like any briefing material you might have on the colonizing group’s values, culture and plans, as well as contacts with any approving agencies and the colonists themselves. I would like to know something of the motives and culture of the group before putting together my briefing. Ambassador Joy Two

Subject : Human Governments From : Ambassador Joy Two, Aegis To : Ambassador Drankum, Aegis CC : The Aegis Advisory Committee Commander Brian Brown, Sky Harbor Aegis Ambassador Joy Seven, Earth Ambassador Joy Eight, MMS Mudd I seem to recall, during the recent misunderstandings regarding paragraph 14(7), that you invoked diplomatic privilege in demanding the right to withdraw your over sized 'diplomatic courier' from Aegis.. (At some time in the future, we might want to consider that incident and the old Gorn incident, and cease acknowledging the diplomatic credentials of over sized ships. It is not required that we accept diplomatic credentials for a craft larger than a scout or at most a frigate.) I advised Captain Muon that your craft should be released, in spite of a clear and present danger to the station. This confirmed precedent under international law and tradition that the commander of a space station does not have proper authority to censor or halt diplomatic traffic. At the time you invoked dire consequences if such precedent was not honored. In addition, if you wish me to represent at need a human government, I believe I will need to contact other human governments. It is not my understanding, nor do I believe it advisable, that you consider the new colony to be your personal fief. Ambassador Seven is my direct report on Earth for good reason. We understand one another. If you cannot provide me with information on the colonists, I must seek whatever other channels available. My sisters share appropriate security clearances, and there is a clear need to know. Either as a military captain of a vessel on which I am serving, or as the ambassador of a foreign power, it would be my desire to further your missions and plans to the best of my ability. I would expect the same of you. A Starfleet Captain's duty is to the best of their ability support the interests of diplomacy and maintaining friendships between powers. To the best of their ability, to the extent it does not compromise specific assigned tasks, they are expected to support any Federation diplomatic personnel on board their vessels, and to a reasonable extent foreign representatives as well. On the other hand, when you are wearing your Ferengi Ambassador hat, you likely should not expect cooperation and friendship from the Federation except to the extent that you provide cooperation and friendship in return. While it is confusing that you are wearing two hats, and it is not always clear when we are talking military authority and when we are talking politics, either way the relationship between us ought to be a mutual honoring of requests. In addition, I fear the androids of Mudd have become somewhat obsessive about who they must obey orders from, and who they must not. It is an asimov processor thing. It would be advisable for you to use the word 'please' rather than 'shall.' As it would not be prudent or constructive for me to instruct you or most any other Ferengi on matters of finance, you likely do not want to start a discussion with me or any Mudd android on laws, treaties and chains of command. Trust me. You don't want to go there. Either you respect my ability to contribute to Aegis and work with me, or I shall take definitive steps to remove myself from any shadow of your authority. I can respect the military and economic agenda you seem to be pressing. I would hope you could respect my desire to make as many friends as possible in the area, and as few enemies. I shall honor any reasonable request to further the interests you are pushing. If you cannot bring yourself to reciprocate, we have a problem. On my first tour on Aegis, when there was an initial clash between Starfleet and Diplomatic personnel, I strove to reduce diplomatic protocol to a few sentences. "Do not search, detain or issue orders to diplomatic ships, embassies or personnel. If something is required, make a polite request. If something is absolutely required, use absurdly excessive civility." I tried to emphasize to the other ambassadors that they should honor any such polite requests if at all possible. I tried to make both Starfleet and the diplomatic corps aware of the principle of reciprocality, that if one did not honor requests, one's own requests are not apt to be honored. I think I could have brought the diplomatic corps around, but Starfleet seemed determined to flaunt the ancient diplomatic traditions at every opportunity. Are you willing to acknowledge them? I shall also note that we of Mudd consider the word 'robot' and its derivatives applied to an android to be the equivalent of organic ethnic slurs. The word implies lack of sentience and poor quality construction that could in no way pass for organic. Please cease usage of such language in any exchange intended to be civil. Ambassador Joy Two

To: Ambassador Joy Two, Sky Harbor Aegis; CC: The Aegis Advisory Committee; Commander Brian Brown, Sky Harbor Aegis; From: Ambassador Drankum, Station Commander, Sky Harbor Aegis Re: Your Message =========================================== Greetings my female robotic humon Ambassador, I believe clarification about local powers is needed given some of your unprofitable assumptions. Do remember that the planet of Kobheeria is within a short distance of several days travel from the facility. This Federation member world shows that the local power structure of this region to be much more fluid than you believe. Regardless of the impact the presence or lack of presence from the Breen Confederacy, there are no other major military powers of concern minus the Cardassian Union. Even though the territory of the Kobheerians does not extend outside of their solar system, the future utilization and possible integration of unclaimed territory of this area will remain a hot topic for years to come. Latinum can be earned in such claims, something the Federation and others have been popular in doing over the past century. The new role proposed for you is to serve as a representative of the humon civilian government when individuals require such an individual. To that end, since the Federation has granted authorization for the colonists to begin operations in the TKR-117, they will need communication with you. However, this is not a colony the humons themselves are sponsoring. I cannot give you further information about the group because there is nothing more available. Outside of knowing they are coming, have individuals who hold citizenship within the Federation, you will have to discover their motives and other profitable facts when they arrive in several weeks. Also, as a side note. Communications dealing with this facility should, due to confidentiality, be restricted to individuals involved. While I understand your female robotic doubles are likely interested in the situation, an Ambassador on Earth or a starship commander have no business knowing about such confidential things. Thank you for your profitable comments. ~Drankum~ AMBASSADOR STATION COMMANDER SKY HARBOR AEGIS, ALPHA QUADRANT

I will note that such an approach to the Romulans is fun to play against. Many alien cultures are relatively simple, and tend to get played shallow and stereotyped. I've fond the combination of honor and mystery creates a better rounded place to develop a character from than most other options.

“Computer, freeze program!” Crystal was clearly uptight. Her normal cheerful humor was entirely missing. Joy simply raised an eyebrow, watching Crystal intensely. “I saw this all live, Joy. I’ve had nightmares about it since. I don’t think I need to see it again.” “We all saw this live, Crystal,” Joy replied. Bruce spoke up. “As holodrama, it won’t sell. If you put us in the control tower, able to respond, to fire weapons back...” Joy looked out the grand panoramic view from her office, frozen as it was by Crystal’s command. The foreground was slightly off. It was still a view of Pylon One, but it was the old Pylon One, the Pylon One that had been destroyed not so long ago. Behind it, the shields were up, but obviously strained by incoming fire from hundreds of Breen ships. The shields were fading. If one had the knowledge to see, it was clearly a matter of not very much time. Those shields were going to come down. This would be the last battle for the old Aegis. “That’s the point,” said Joy. “The colonists won’t be able to respond. This is the perspective from which they will see any Breen incursion. They will be spectators, and targets. This is also the correct situation to review. Breen ships appeared with little notice. While we upgraded in the rebuild, so have the Breen with their temporal shielding. This is still the most recent measure of the capabilities of Aegis against the capabilities of the Breen.” “Are you intending to give the same opening brief?” Bruce asked. “The one point I’ve agreed with Drankum on lately is your obsession with Admiral Goram. You might do well to let it go.” Joy shook her head. “This battle was lost before the first shot was fired. I could put us in the control tower, rerun the program over and over, let you reallocate outgoing fire however as often as you’d like, and the end result would be the same. This fight wasn’t lost to firepower, but to politics.” Joy began to pace. “The Romulan ambassador was kicked off the station just before the battles started. You’ll note there are no Romulan ships here. The Cardassian ambassador went to the control tower to offer full cooperation. He was scorned like dirt. He too left the station, and he never returned.” Joy pointed angrily to the situation display. “Note the Cardassian fleet is still holding by Cardassia Prime. They withheld their offered and scorned coordination and support until the battle was truly decided. I’ll add that the Ferengi ambassador had already left as well, not that the Ferengi offered a single ship during this whole campaign.” Joy seemed almost angry at Crystal and Bruce. “This battle was lost by an arrogant egotistical commander who didn’t think it important to make more friends than enemies. This battle was lost by someone who thought in terms of firepower first and only, and that diplomacy was not at all important.” Bruce’s voice was ever so dry. “And you think it might happen again?” “Damn straight it could happen again!” Crystal’s contribution was much quieter. “Do not kill or injure sentient beings...” Joy, of course, completed the quote, firmly, with a quiet but deep passion, as a religious leader might recite holy creed. “Nor through inaction allow sentient beings to be killed or injured.” “Joy! This wasn’t your fault!” “It may not have been my fault,” she replied, “but it was my duty.”

True. The Camelot campaign went militaristic enough, pushed the Section 31 / Starfleet Intelligence style of culture so far, that I felt I needed to pull Joy out if it entirely. Perhaps it might be prudent to run Rihannsu sims and entirely separate Romulan sims. All those participating in either might agree that one approach should be considered primary. For a Federation sims with a few Romulan characters running through, might folks be expected to make room for one another? Would it be the hosts' call whether or not it is necessary to declare one history or the other canon? I'd hate to think we'd often have to go to that extreme, but after trying to play the designed for TNG Joy in environments her programming just didn't work, I could see where it might be necessary.

I will admit to have liked The Romulan Way a good deal, though I didn't follow up with pursuit of other stories in the series. I'd agree that too many Trek races are played as stereotypes, with no variations of culture, philosophy and perhaps not enough between individuals. I've had a few continuity problems with different interpretations of a race. At one time Joy worked closely with a Klingon character, creating some interesting stories and relationships. At a later time, I ran into another player with a different interpretation of the Klingons, who tried to tell me that no Klingon would behave as Joy said a Klingon had behaved. As Joy's played out in sim history conflicted with his made up background, I would have to change Joy's history. My solution since has been to be vague when telling stories about one's home culture or from other sims. Oh, Jorahl and Joy on Aegis might occasionally chat about old events on Camelot, and I'll occasionally mention that the MMS Mudd is built on a Klingon B'rel hull, with an engine design based on The Makers, but it doesn't seem prudent and right to insist that my own character background and history is entirely canon. I'm too creative and free with Joy for everything she does to be canon. Various Joys have participated in too many sims for everyone to agree that everything she has done is plausible or correct. I think players of Romulans might have to flow that way too. Perhaps there have to be different Romulan philosophies and values that reflect the different canon versions of the Romulans. I know I have to do the same thing even with Federation politics. Some players like the early idealistic Roddenbery Federation ideals, while others like the later more militaristic perspective. No race or society might be entirely uniform.