Nicolas Lepage

After Ronin left, Ethan turned back to Lepage, "Ask your questions, but I may not be able to give you too many answers." Nick waited for the doors to close before talking. "I don't want to know what you've been doing. That's none of my business. I want honest answers to my questions, though." "I'll answer if I can." This was not the answer Nick had hoped for but he guessed it was the best he'd get. "How are you feeling? I know the treatment can be a bit rough. Any nausea or dizziness?" Ethan sighed, "Mostly I feel okay. A little dizziness, if I don't take breaks often enough." "That's most likely due to the medication. Have you had any symptoms during the last couple of weeks. I understand you had severe headaches." Nick didn't like talking to patients like this. He preferred an actual conversation to this sort of interrogation but there wasn't much time for that now. Ethan shook her head, "Not generally. I think just one since.. though hearing that guy die was... difficult." She took a deep breath, "I'm not going to lie to you, Nick. It's been a really rough couple of months, but they wouldn't have sent me out here if it was still ongoing. There are a few problems left to overcome, and I'm not allowed on the ice for another month, but I know what a relapse entails, and I'm not going to risk it." For the first time since the news of the disease spreading on Cardassia came in, Nick actually smiled. He wanted to reassure Ethan. He knew that usually doctors were just considered a nuisance what with their physicals and constant questions about one's health. Usually this view changed as soon as someone wasn't feeling well. Right now he wanted to make sure Ethan understood what he wanted. "I appreciate your honesty with me. I know people like to lie to their doctors for different reasons...shame, fear, not wanting to be temporarily relieved of their duty. I think you know that I'm not here to cause you trouble. I'm going to declare you fit for duty under one condition. You come to see me immediately if you feel worse. And I'd like you to have a check-up every other day. If you don't want it to be generally known that you have health problems I'm sure we can arrange something." Almost grimly, Ethan nodded, "Oh, you better believe I'll be at your doorstep if anything changes. I know we haven't always seen eye-to-eye, and I'm sorry for that. There were.. reasons. But I don't think medical is a nightmare to be avoided at all costs. Though, if you were willing to make a house call or two.. to avoid it being too known.. I'd rather they think we were dating than something is wrong. I don't need questions right now." Nick nodded. "You don't need to apologize. I know you had reasons for what you did and you know I had reasons for not being happy with it. I'm sure I can arrange stopping by your quarters if you prefer or you just come to see me after my shift." He paused for a moment before smiling again. "I'm glad you're back. You still owe me a game of hockey if I remember correctly." Ethan smiled wryly, "It'll have to wait. My ... well, they still have my skates in lock-up, to ensure I don't go on the ice. It was the condition to get back out here. Though we could go watch one, if you like." "Oh, you bet I wouldn't ask you to play until you've fully recovered. Watching a game would work, though. Unfortunately I'm almost sure we won't have much time for a while. Before I forget it, you need to get your physical done. Seeing as I'd like to run a few more extensive scans I fear we'll have to do that here in sickbay. But you could just come in sometime late in the evening." Ethan nodded, "Can it wait a week, though? So you don't have to log 'abnormal readings'?" Nick considered the suggestion for a moment. "I'd prefer to do one as soon as possible just to know where you're at right now. How about I forget to log the first one? It'd just be for me anyway. Maybe we could adjust your medication a bit, too." Relieved, Ethan nodded agreement, "That would be fine. You're so forgetful, you know. But, I'll come back in a few hours? I need to get Ronin and his team off, fill in Captain Quark--that just sounds a little strange to me-- and you probably need to file your reports on the Cardassian." "That works. And yes, Captain Quark...that will take some getting used to. Anyway, I hardly ever leave sickbay before midnight. If you haven't come in by then I'll hunt you down!" With a smile, Hawke stood carefully, "You've got a deal. I'll see you in a few hours, doctor." "See you and take it easy. Always remember, if something happens while you're on duty the whole crew will know about your condition within hours." A grin spread over Nick's face. He was glad Ethan was more reasonable than most of his patients. With a cheery wave, she exited his office, and headed out of Sickbay while tapping her commbadge, "Hawke to Quark. Do you have a minute? We have a little problem."

Happy Birthday Muon!

Owen was sitting on a bench in the locker room. The conversation With Paradox had completely thrown him off his guard. The last couple of days had been a complete disaster and now this. Megan waltzed into the locker room following a light workout. It felt GOOD to be out of Sickbay, and working out just a little. She knew better than to push too hard and risk Troll's wrath... not to mention the wrath of her own petite body. "Hey, Buddha!" she called happily, "I didn't expect to see you here. It's the middle of the night." Buddha frowned and looked up. "Hey, shouldn't you be taking things easy?" He wasn't exactly happy to see Megan and he wasn't quite sure whether he had managed to keep his voice as casual as he wanted. Megan looked at him and frowned. He looked a little stressed out. She sauntered over, and plopped herself in his lap. "I am taking it easy. I barely worked up any sweat, love. What's wrong, Owen?" Owen resisted the urge to push Megan away. Instead he leaned his forehead against her shoulder and sighed. "I'm just...I'm alright." He wasn't sure he wanted to go into details with her. She gently hooked her arm around his neck, "I'm here, if you want to talk about it." She ran her fingers lightly across his back, in a gentle way. Buddha relaxed a bit. Her touch felt good. Finally he was glad that he wasn't alone right now. Before he knew it he had told her everything that he had just learned from Paradox. "...Can you imagine that? There are actually people on this ship who believe that miserable little worm is just misunderstood." He looked pleadingly into Megan's eyes, hoping she would agree with him. "He doesn't deserve protection, at least not when it means putting ourselves at risk." Megan's fingers continued to caress his back, and occasionally roamed through his hair. "I can imagine that. Fleeters..." She rolled her eyes, "They want to save the universe. That's why they have us, you know. They were afraid to do what needed doing. Paradox and Medusa made the right call. Had he asked for our help... that'd be one thing. But to ... no, you're right. After what he did, he doesn't deserve our protection. Not at all." Owen took a deep breath, put his arm around Megan and pulled her a bit closer. "Thanks. I needed someone to tell me I was right. It's good to see you're doing better." Megan smiled, "I'm fine. And of course you're right.. You're a marine. We're always right, right?" She returned his embrace, tightening her own arms around him. "Right!" For a split second Owen considered reminding Megan of her rules. But he liked where this was going. He didn't have rules concerning personal contact to crewmates anyway. So he would just see how far she'd let him go. He looked back up into her eyes and smiled. "You need a shower, muffincake." Megan grinned, "For this little bit? Nah... Need to work up a real sweat first, love." "Well now...I could help you getting sweaty alright." His grin was even wider than Megan's. He was sure the message wouldn't be lost on M&M. The question was just how she would react. Megan sighed, still grinning, her lips bare centimeters away from his, "I'm not supposed to.. I'm on light duty. Troll would kill me." Owen shrugged almost imperceptibly "Troll doesn't have to know and I sure hope it doesn't qualify as duty." Then he leaned in to kiss Megan. Megan returned the kiss with unrestrained enjoyment. After a minute or two, she leaned back, "Are you feeling less stressed now?" He smiled and shrugged. "A bit." Owen didn't break eye contact and he wished that just this once she wouldn't turn him down. But he wouldn't push her either. He knew full well that one wrong move would spoil everything. Megan smiled again, "Good. Me too. Feel like joining me in my quarters? I could use some company..." She paused, then sighed, "I don't want to ruin our friendship, Owen. But it'd be nice to just be held for a while, if you'd be willing." Owen couldn't say whether he was happy or disappointed. He decided to go for it and make up his mind about his feelings later. He nodded. "I think I could do that, muffincake." With that he loosened his embrace and let Megan get up. Together they made their way to Megan’s quarters.

Day entered the deserted marine lounge well into the Agincourt night. She'd tried to meditate again, but with poor results. Her head was throbbing. Her mind was racing. She needed the solace that only a gooey hot fudge sundae could provide. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Lt. Matthews, and briefly wondered why he was up so late. She placed her order at the replicator: warm pecan brownie, topped with chocolate ice cream, hot fudge, chocolate chips, and chocolate whipped cream. Picking it up from the replicator, she made her way to an empty table with a view of the stars. Sitting down with a sigh, she just stared out at the nebula for several minutes, forgetting the confection in front of her. Buddha was sitting in a corner of the lounge, a half full glass of some colourless liquid in front of him. He had been here since the end of his shift. At first the lounge had been full with marines chatting excitedly, relaxed after a long shift. Usually Owen was among them, sharing the latest gossip. Today he had kept to himself. People had called over to him but noone had made the effort to sit next to him and ask what was wrong. Owen was grateful for that. He didn't want company tonight. Now the lounge was deserted except for him and whoever had just arrived. He hadn't bothered looking up. He listened to the other marine order something at the replicator and then sit down at a table. Only then did he look up to see who it was. Owen was surprised to see Day. After a few seconds he got up, took his glass and walked over to her. "Good evening Colonel, mind if I join you?" Day looked up, almost startled, "Buddha. I.. uh.. I'm not real good company.” Owen shrugged and took a seat not getting the hint. "Neither am I." He took a sip from his glass before going on. "Had a bad day, too, eh?" Day looked at him incredulously. Was he really that dense? Oh, wait.. he's a Marine. Nevermind. She sighed, "Having still, thank you. What's wrong with you?" "Oh, you mean other than almost killing M&M? Wait, I think there was this mission on which we accidentally killed a whole shipload of Selshans...that could be it...not sure, yet though." He hadn't mean to be as sarcastic as that but somehow it felt good taking his frustration out on someone. Day looked at him, "That was yesterday. What happened today? Good Grief, Buddha. Can't you even come up with NEW stuff to whine about?" Owen was just taking another sip...and choked. After coughing for the better part of two minutes he looked at Paradox. "I'm sorry but I only do killing every other day. Today was my appointment at the beauty parlour." He sighed. "So, what bad things have happened today...I mean except that you won't let me deal with that Selshan worm in the brig?" He looked challengingly over to Day. Day's jaw tightened ominously, "If you try it, so help me... I WILL keelhaul you." Her anger was almost a physical presence, and was demonstrated as she picked up her half-melted dessert and threw it across the room. "And THEN, I'll bust you back to Private and you can go back through basic right along with the other two!" Owen didn't flinch. His head turned, his eyes following the trajectory of the sundae. "I take it someone else has done that already." Buddha surprised himself at how calm he managed to stay at this outburst of anger. He took another sip. "Don't worry, I got my orders and I follow them. Who are "the other two" if I may ask?" "The two that broke into the brig to question the bastard... the bleeding heart and her accomplice. The ones that may expose Harper and I to ... Nevermind. At least you follow orders. Like I told Medusa, Marines are easier." Buddha tried hard to suppress a grin. Obviously someone had managed to ###### off Paradox big time. "Yes Marines are much easier. So, you're making those two go through basic...I mean marine basic? Wow...what a prospect. But don't you think you are overreacting? I mean two fleeters disobeying orders....that's usually not such a big deal." Paradox glared at him again, "It is when it's two of the (expletive deleted) department heads! There isn't much else we can do to them. Considering the trouble they have caused, and the... no, it's not overreacting. If anything, they're still getting off easy. They could be court-martialed for this." "Department heads? Wow...I think I understand why you're so...euh...upset. but you know...he deserved it...whatever they've done to him, he deserved it." Again, Day sighed, "They want to KEEP him. Forgive him. He's just misunderstood, you see..." Her fist clenched and unclenched, "We're giving him back to the Selshan. It's the best way to keep ourselves out of a war with them. But they want to use him for intel, as a guide..." Owen raised his eyebrows. "I'm sorry I think I didn't get what you said...build up of earwax or something...did you say they want to FORGIVE him? Put the safety of the crew and the ship at risk in order to save this squalid little worm? Don't get me wrong, I'm all for protecting the weak but this guy knowingly sabotaged our mission so we'd kill hundreds of his people. He isn't worth putting any of our crew at risk!" "Precisely why Medusa and I opted to return him." She took a deep breath, "His motives... deep down, are somewhat honorable. He's trying to get the attention of the government.. really make changes. But he went about it SO the wrong way.... " She sighed again, pressing index fingers to her temples. "I'll give him this.. he's a fighter." Owen shook his head vigorously. "A fighter? He's a coward. He used us. You know, it's not just the motives that matter but also the means. As far as I am concerned he doesn't deserve to live. The only reason why I haven't killed him yet is that it would put me on the same level as him. I don't give a rat's rear what the Selshan will do with him. And if giving him back assures save passage for us...all the better." He leaned back in his chair, still not believing what he had just heard. He knocked back the rest of the drink and set the glass back on the table with a loud thud. Day's face paled a little. Was he right? Can the motives justify the means? Was the means of the mind-meld justified by the motive to protect the ship? Her eyes dropped, as the internal struggle resulting from the last several hours renewed itself once more. Owen stared at his glass for a couple of minutes. No one spoke. Suddenly he got up, almost knocking over his chair. I think I should go try and get some sleep." Lost in thought, she didn't even really acknowledge him. The only person that might understand her dilemma was the last person she could discuss it with. Doctor Levy was a telepath, but she was a doctor, and her oath would compel her to report the violation of regs. Leaving the Marine lounge Owen knew he would probably not sleep tonight. He had the irresistible urge to smash something. A couple of minutes later he was in the locker room of the gym, changing for a long workout.

Nick was standing beside a biobed equipped with a surgical support frame. Ever since patients started pouring into sickbay 45 minutes ago he had been in the OR. He had ordered Mimi to remain on the Endeavour and oversee triage there, so he was the only physician on the Pandora's Box. The patients who were beamed to the PB were only those whose condition required immediate surgery or other extensive treatment just to make sure they'd survive. Nick ran the anabolic protoplase along the patient's intestines which had been ruptured when a sharp object had pierced his abdomen. This surgery had been the messiest so far. Opening and cleaning the abdominal cavity was always a time consuming and unpopular job. Fortuantely all that was left now was healing the actual injury. The rest could be done by Robin. Five minutes later Nick had changed into new scrubs, grabbed a coffee and a PADD with the details of his next surgery. This patient had already undergone treatment for his pneumothorax. Nick scrolled further down and sighed as he saw the reasons this man was schedules for surgery. The fractured femur had ruptured the femoral artery. Nick raised a brow and looked over to the patient. The guy had been lucky he had been found so quickly. An injury like this could be lethal within minutes. Thanks to modern technology the bleeding had been stilled and the damaged part of the artery had been bypassed externally to ensure blood supply to the leg. After taking a last sip of his coffee Nick called over to Mary-Alice. He needed her to assist him so he wanted to discuss the procedure with her...it would save them time later. As Mary-Alice approached Nick held out the PADD to her and started explaining what needed to be done. While the nurse was perusing the PADD the CMO sent a young medic he had never seen before to get what exactly he needed for the surgery. "Is this the last one?" Mary-Alice asked. Nick nodded. "Yes but I'm not sure how long this will take. I think it'll be best to replace the damaged part of the artery. We will have to check for bone fragments, too. I hope there won't be any problems due to blood loss. I'd like to wait until he's more stable but an external bypass is always a risk. Ready?" Mary-Alice nodded almost imperceptibly and walked off in the direction of the patient. Nick followed her. As they stood on opposite sides of the biobed he looked down onto the patient. With a sigh he picked up the exoscalpel and made the first incision.

A Marshall and Matthews production Megan looked around. It had been well over an hour since the shuttle's rather dramatic return. Tensions were still running high, but the Selshan hadn't yet attacked. She was feeling so much agression at the moment, just from the stress of it all, that she finally sidled up to Owen Matthews and smacked him with her glove before throwing it on the floor--the clear invitation for a sparring match. Owen was startled at first. He had been imagining various ways to torture a certain Selshan and hadn't even noticed Megan had approached him. He looked at the glove on the floor. Then his eyes wandered slowly upwards to look at Megan. Crossing his arms in front of him he glared at Megan for a few seconds before talking to her. "I hope you know you won't be able to win that fight, M&M." Megan grinned broadly, "We'll see about that, Buddha. We're about even on wins, remember." She paused, glancing around, "I know we're still on alert, but if I don't work off some steam I'm going to explode. Come on... We can quit if things heat up again. It's not like it's truly against regs." Owen nodded curtly and picked up Megan's glove. "I'm game. I'd just like you to remember that I've had a pretty bad day and I can't wait to...well...you got yourself a sparring partner." For the first time since the team had left for the mission Owen smiled. "I'll try to go easy on you." Megan laughed briefly, "If you do, I'll wipe the floor with you, Lt. That's a promise." She led the way to the closest holodeck, the primary Marine Training Holodeck, which was just off one side of the NNC. "So, you have a preference of style?" "I'll let you choose. That way you won't be able to complain afterwards that it wasn't fair." Owen considered Megan for a second before entering the holodeck. He was glad he had finally met someone who responded to his taunts in kind. And she was hot. She shook her head, "No, you'll just complain that's why you lost. Fine.. Bat'leth." And with that, she called out the specifications to the computer for her chosen weapon. She began wielding it expertly as Owen acquired his own. Buddha took his bat'leth and ran his thumb gently along the blade. He liked this weapon. It might seem old fashioned to some but it was elegant and absolutely lethal if used by an experienced fighter. "Prepare for the worst defeat of your life, M&M" Her laugh rung out in counterpoint to the first clashing of their blades. "We have an ego today, don't we?" She swung overhand quickly, forcing him to bring his own blade up to meet the blow. But that exposed his midsection, to which she aimed a quick jabbing kick. Owen jumped back to avoid Megan's kick but was a bit too late. He lost balance as her foot connected with his ribs, toppled over backwards but used the momentum to get back to his feet without ever using his hands. "You should have noticed by now that I always have...an ego." He struck with his bat'leth but Megan was quick enough to raise her own and the blades clashed again. The battle raged between the two for several minutes, blow followed by counter-strike, with neither really gaining the upper hand. The banter had continued for a minute, but then ceased as both focused on the joy of the fight. The only real sounds were the ring of blade on blade, and the occasional grunt when one of them landed a fist or foot. Owen felt the sweat running down his back. He was breathing hard as the fight grew more intense but he enjoyed it. This was exactly what he had needed. Suddenly he noticed that Megan over-swung by just a fraction of an inch.. He aimed an underhanded blow at her, intent on ending the fight. When he struck he knew Megan would never be fast enough to counter his attack. For a split second a look of triumph was on his face. Then he got the feeling something was wrong...terribly wrong. The blade slid home like a knife through butter. If the total shock on Megan's face wasn't enough to indicate a problem, the thin line of blood trickling from one corner of her mouth would be. The safeties in the marine holodecks were designed to allow 'lethal blows' to be delivered, with the computer system dematerializing the portion of the blade that would impact the body. In this case, the blade did not disappear as the tip punctured into her abdomen and traveled upwards into her right lung, through her liver. Megan gasped, unable to speak. She reached forward, instinctive grabbing at the blade, and cutting her hands deeply. No longer able to stand, she fell to her knees. As soon as Owen saw that something was wrong he rushed forward to help M&M. "Megan," he called out as he reached her and sank to his knees beside her. He reached out to hold her and prevent her from falling over onto her stomach and that way driving the blade even deeper into her body. When he put his hands around her he felt the warm blood run down his hands and he heard Megan's wheezy breath grow weaker. 'No,' he thought. 'This can't be happening...how?' "Megan! Can you hear me?" He was starting to get desperate. He looked into her eyes and only saw a look of shock. "I'll get help, M&M, don't worry." He laid her down gently and tapped his commbadge. "Matthews to sickbay. I need a doctor in the primary Marine Holodeck, fast!"

1 pm if I didn't make a mistake.

I tried out as many positions as possible in the Academy. I even graduated as an engineer (unbelievable!!!). My problem was that I had never seen the shows in English so I didn't know any of the technobabble that's used in the shows. So I figured I'd do in sim what I'm best at in RL...medbabble. Since then most of my characters have been in medical. Anyway, the longer you play the better you get at playing posts you don't usually like. My advice would be to just try out as many positions as possible in the Academy sims before deciding on a department for your advanced sim.

Amnor walked quietly into Sickbay, and after catching the CMO's eyes, stepped into a side room. Glancing back before the doors closed, she was glad to see that there was no blood trail behind her. She sat down rather heavily, just weary from the whole incident, and hoped that he wouldn't lecture her too much. Nick frowned as he watched Amnor walk across sickbay, obviously trying not to be seen. Wondering why she was here and what was wrong with her, he told Mary-Alice to make sure they wouldn't be disturbed. He entered the room, waited for the doors to close and smiled. "To what do I owe the honour, Commander?" Amnor attempted to smile, thinking that the blood trails down her face, the dark stain on her uniform, and the lovely bruises that are appearing would have clued him in. "I was just lonely for your company, doctor. Is that so hard to believe?" Nick chuckled. "You don't have to get yourself in such a state just to come down here and talk to me. I know you can't resist me." Before Amnor could make a comment he held up a hypospray and added. "Or rather the allergy shot I can give you. Before I start scanning you I'd like to know what happened. I don't need to know any details." "At least I don't have a Caitian in my department like I once did. And as for what happened, would you believe that I fell down?" She paused, seeing the look on his face, "No, I didn't think so. Well, the truth of the matter is that I got into a fight... with several... dozen... others." Nick sighed and picked up a tricorder. "Somehow this doesn't surprise me. What does surprise me, though is that you're back on the station. Would you lie down, please?" She winced, but did as he asked, "Yes, it is quite a surprise, isn't it? I suspect there are some broken ribs involved as well. This is quite uncomfortable, you know." He nodded. "Yeah, I know." Nick started scanning Amnor's head. "I suspect there's some serious head trauma involved. How else would you have decided to come here? Is it a secret or will you enlighten me?" Nick took a quick glance at her vitals before going on to scan her chest. "This is more than I could discretely attend to myself. A large quantity of angry... creatures.. can do a lot of damage in a short period of time." She closed her eyes briefly, thinking of the amount of work needed to fix her fighter--it would be a couple of weeks before she would be able to make a longer run to Bajor. "A large quantity of angry creatures...it's the first time I've heard it put this way." Nick finished the scans. "You'll be glad to hear that those angry creatures didn't do a very thorough job. You've got a few cuts and bruises and two broken ribs. I'll be able to make you look a bit more presentable. It might take a few minutes though." Eyes still closed, she nodded, "Transporters are a wonderful invention, you know. A convenient method of escape from angry creatures." She sighed, "Except when they have surface-to-air missiles..." She opened her eyes and looked at him, "You didn't hear that." Nick shrugged and grinned. "Hear what?" He picked up a hypospray and administered some metorapan. Then he picked up the dermal regenerator and started to heal the cuts and bruises. "Are you going to stay on Aegis for a while?" He had given up trying to find out more about the incident. Again, she sighed, "My request for transfer was denied. Apparently, I am needed here for the time being." "It sounds like you're absolutely thrilled at the prospect of staying here. It's not quite as bad, you know...I mean it's not as long as the station doesn't get blown up." Her expression shifted to one of sadness, "It's just that this place holds some memories... ones that are difficult." She took a deep breath and slowly exhaled, "Still, if this is where Starfleet wants me, this is where I will be." Nick went on treating the wounds as he spoke. "Maybe talking to a counselor might help...if you don't want that...well, I'm here." He shot a quick glance at her before concentrating on his work again. She smiled briefly, "I doubt a counselor would be able to help in this instance. The last time I was assigned here, I left.. with my husband. He's been missing for 8 years now." She sighed again, and did not continue. "I'm sorry to hear that. It must be hard not to know what's happened. I can't say I know how it feels. It must be difficult to move on, though." She nodded, then sat up as he finished his work. "Thank you, doctor. Good as.. well, good as ever. I would, of course, appreciate it if you would forget to log this incident." "Why would I log this? We just had a nice talk among friends. You should come in tomorrow for...euh...another talk. And hmm...if there's anything wrong you know where to find me. I basically live here. Oh...and before I forget it...you should try to avoid angry creatures for a few days." She smiled wider, "I'll be sure to do that... not that I can go anywhere until I fix things. Thank you, Nick. As always, I appreciate your help. Remind me to buy you a drink one of these days." Nick nodded and smiled. "I could do with a bit of a private life so I might just take you up on that offer. You could do me one favour though." He grinned mischievously. She raised an eyebrow. "Could you please tell people that we're not as bad as they think down here?" A small chuckle escaped her lips. "Not that they'll believe me... but I'll see what I can do." She stood, and with a small smile, headed for the exit. Nick watched Amnor leave the room and stayed behind to clean up.

Wow, this is a first, someone complaining about the controls of a game before even trying them. I have a Wii and I have to say that in all the games I've played so far I've never had a problem with the controls (at least once I got used to the general concept of the Wii). I'm not sure I'd buy a Star Trek game actually. Except for Elite Forse I've been disappointed by most of them and since the games cost around 60 Euros I'm not sure I'd be willing to take the risk of buying one I don't like. Well, we'll see, maybe I'll get to try it sometime.

I've got the same problem as eagle. I have a PC and I use Firefox to get into the rooms. Since my last update of Java I cannot see the text colours either.

Still smiling and drenched in sweat Buddha entered the locker room after a good workout and a victory in a sparring fight. Megan had finished her workout about 10 minutes before, and was already in the locker room. Emerging from the shower area with only a towel around her hair, she spotted Buddha coming in. "Did you win?" Owen turned around quickly to see who had spoken. He hadn't heard Megan enter the room. When he recognized her he smiled. "Yup, there was a cocky guy who needed to be shown his place." He shrugged before going on. "It wasn't much of a challenge." Buddha decided it was better for his health not to comment on Megan's attire, or rather the lack thereof, for the time being. Megan smirked, walking towards a mirror. She began toweling off her hair, so her words were slightly mumbled, but the motion certainly was interesting. "Must have been one of the new guys.. or was a security officer?"" Buddha positioned himself so that Megan wouldn't be able to see him in the mirror and watched her, grinning."It was one of the security folks. Tell me, is this your new tactic for disabling male enemies?" Megan paused, looking up at him, "What do you mean? I just finished my workout. I needed a shower... Which, if you'll forgive me saying so, you look like you could use one, too. This IS a co-ed locker room, you know." She shook her head briefly, "Are you embarrassed?" Owen laughed. "Embarrassed? I? No, I was just wondering. It might work, you know. At least for those security guys out there." A grin spread across his face. "You'd be an asset to any Betazoid wedding." She turned around to face him, and walked up to him, leaving the towel behind. "Been to a couple. You hang out with a half Betazoid for long enough, and it's inevitable." She paused, and grinned bigger, "So, you think I should wear nothing but my phaser net when we have the challenge?" Buddha smiled down at her. "I'm disappointed. You don't think that a bit of bare skin would distract me enough to lose a fight against you, M&M." He leaned closer to whisper in her ear. "You wouldn't even need that phaser net if we decided on a little hand to hand combat training." She took the opportunity to tickle him, before striding back to her locker. "You're a Marine. I would hope having a nude opponent wouldn't distract you. But you know.. that's certainly a thought for the challenge. However, that might give us an unfair advantage. Not that we don't already have one." She pulled out her underclothes, and her phaser net and started dressing. "You're ruining the mood, Megan," he said with a wink before staring to undress. "I was a bit out of the loop in gamma shift. What exactly happen with this challenge thing?" Owen dropped his shirt carelessly onto the floor and sat down on one of the benches, starting to undo the laces of his shoes. She sat down facing him, "You haven't heard?" She paused to laugh, "It's the talk of the ship. Paradox challenged Commander JoNs to a .. duel, for lack of a better term. Our Marines versus her Security dept." Owen chuckled. "Sounds like Paradox alright. I can't believe how much you miss out on being on gamma shift. I still think it was a bit harsh to reassign me just because I didn't do too well on my last psychological assessment." He looked at Megan, hoping for a bit of support. "I mean c'mon, I didn't go completely nuts or anything. I was just a bit...well wouldn't you have been after your ship got destroyed and you lost most of your friends and crewmates?" She nodded understandingly, "I don't think that had anything to do with it, Owen. Someone has to be on Gamma. If they were worried about you, they'd probably have kept you where they could keep a closer eye on you. I've taken rotations on Gamma, too, you know." She pulled out her uniform and continued dressing. He tossed his shoes into the locker and sighed. "Yeah right. It's just...it feels like you're being punished for something. I mean, nothing ever happens. Most of the time we just sat around playing poker and hoping the shift would be over soon. You know how it is. Most of the people there are just out of the academy, never seen any real action." Owen shook his head, got back up and tossed his pants onto a pile with his shirt. She paused to look at him, "Someone had to be there to show them the ropes. But you're back with us now. All is forgiven." She grinned, watching him head to the shower. She finished dressing. "Perhaps we all should show up to the hand-to-hand challenge that way." She stood. "I've got a report to file. You okay?" Owen turned around just before entering the shower. He looked at Megan sheepishly. "Yeah, sure, I just had to vent some of my frustration." Then his face split into a broad grin and he looked down at himself. "I guess I could distract the female part of the security department." With that he turned around and headed for the shower. She took one last look, then headed for the door, "See you later, Buddha."

Kevin was standing next to the biobed looking down at Swan, this was the first time he saw her up close. It was quite a different thing to be standing next to her now. After all the last thing she'd heard from him was that her crew had died. "Rai and Jiri at Lungha, Swan." He managed a smile. Nick decided to keep in the background, watching Kevin and his patient for the time being. There was not much he'd be able to do anyway. Swan smiled back "Rai and Jiri at Lungha" She once again sat up on the side of the bed. She put her hand to her forehead and cringed a slight amount and then looked back to Kevin. Kevin looked back at Dr Lepage to see if it was okay for her to sit up. "Marat in the fields of Nogra?" Nick instinctively grabbed a hypospray but didn't go and administer it. The Tamarian seemed to be ok and he wanted to give her time to ask some questions. He nodded briefly for Anderson to go ahead. Swan nodded ever so slightly, "Nahki with his family." She looked between Nick and Kevin, waiting for an answer. Nick shrugged and looked at Kevin, thinking that the last sentence almost made sense. "Dr Lepage, she would like to see her crew, is that possible?" Kevin didn't know if that was a good idea, but he understood her wish. Nick frowned. "She knows they are dead, right?" "Yes, I told her they were dead, that's the reason why she wasn't too well." Kevin nodded then turning his attention back to Swan. "Can she?" Swan looked between the two as they spoke, trying to understand their language. It was almost starting to make sense to her but she wasn't sure she could communicate with them yet. Leaning back against the biobed next to Swan's Nick considered the matter for a moment. He took a quick glance at Swan and then nodded. "Yes, I think it would be ok. I want to stay with her, however. Just in case." In an attempt to make Swan familiar with his language Kevin looked at her and nodded. "Yes," he spoke slowly, "You can see them later." Then he switched back to Tamarian. "Karan and Jiri during the full moon." Swan looked at Kevin for a moment. She closed her eyes and then opened them slowly once more. She took a deep breath and nods her acceptance to answering what ever he wishes. Karan and Jiri hear the sounds." Nick looked confused. "What's she saying?" Kevin turned around briefly before turning his attention back to Swan. "I said that I had a few questions and she said that she's willing to answer them." "Ah! Let's hope she's got some answers for us." With that Nick leaned back again and let Kevin do his work. "Felia and Rix at Falash, Swan?" There were really only three important questions, who was she, who attacked them and what were they after. So this was number one. Swan pointed to herself, "Swan," she then tried an attempt at their language. "Swan importance am I." She waited to see what his reaction would be. Kevin raised his eyebrows in surprise and smiled broadly. "Important? How important? Felia?" He was confident they were getting somewhere. She smiled seeing she managed to say something correctly, or at least he understood. "Swan, Rix hung high. High post on vessel." Nick was still listening. "Captain or XO I guess," he muttered. Turning to Dr Lepage Kevin said: "We can assume she was the captain of the ship." Then he turned to Swan. "Captain? What vessel was this? Ria in Kinta?" "Ria, Lomcui, Vessel Tamarian." "Yes, but, transport ship? Or science vessel? Or something else?" It was going slow but at least it was going. Swan looked around the room as if not wanting anyone else to hear. Then she leaned closer to Kevin. "Lomcui ..." she thought for a moment, " Rai and Jiri at Lunhga. Trust vessel" She shook her head, " Shaka when the walls fell." Nick frowned. "A trust vessel... were they on a diplomatic mission?" Kevin frowned and looked at Dr Lepage. "They had set out to make first contact, it was a diplomatic mission, and they failed." Kevin turned back to Swan to ask the most important question. "Who did it?" Swan looked down. She was feeling the loss of her crew. She didn't answer, she just shook her head no. She mumbled again in a low, soft, disappointed voice. "Shaka when the walls fell." Kevin put his hand on her shoulder. "Yes, Shaka. But it wasn't your fault. Who attacked you?" He just had to find out. She looked up and shook her head once again. She wished she could help him but she couldn't. "Know not." Kevin nodded and gently squeezed her shoulder, which felt like an odd gesture to him now that he knew she was a Captain. "That's okay, you try to get well now. Girab with hands in the air." Swan nodded then asked once more, "I want to see my crew. Karan and Jiri heard the sounds." Swan's eyes were getting heavy and she could barely keep them open. She lay back down and tried for only a moment to regain her strength and waited for him to answer her about her crew. Nodding her agreement she asked: "Friends, are we?" She managed to open her eyes enough to look "Yes, later, after you slept some." Kevin watched Swan as she lay back down on the biobed and closed her eyes. This interrogation must have been exhausting for her. Kevin smiled and nodded. "Of course we're friends." She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep once more.

I finally finished reading the book, too. YAY! Since most of my friends are really slow reading books in English or waiting for the German translation I kinda avoid the topic at the moment 'cos I was planning to still live for a little while. Anyway, to all those who haven't read/finished the book yet...I'm sure you won't be disappointed.

How about YOU DA? Alright...maybe I don't really want to go there.......

Well, taxes or not, we do have to pay that much. Besides, it does have a positive effect. We pay high taxes on gas in order to make people buy cars that use less gas. It actually works. It's very rare that you see vans, pickups and SUVs over here. (I've always wondered why a person would want to drive an SUV in town but well...) People go for the smalles and most cost effective cars possible. Given that most families don't have more than 2 children anyway people don't need vans and the like. I think in the end that's a positive development. Seeing as we already have to deal with some effects of global warming it's not really a bad idea to force the industrie to develop new technologies. (And it's not just something made up to scare people. We've had nine of the ten warmest winters in history during the past 10 years. Last winter we've had only two or three nights where it had been freezing. Usually we get temperatures below 0°C for at least a month. Temperatures have been about 3°C above average. That's just one example...I could give many more.) Since I usually walk or take my bike to get to places I don't care much about gas prices. Of course, I know that I have to pay more for my bus pass than I would if gas was cheaper but it's not all that bad. I don't even have a car and I save a lot of money (no gas, no taxes, no maintenace etc.) nerves and probably time, too. (I don't spend half an hour to find a parking space, I don't get tickets and I don't get stuck in traffic jams.) Unfortunately, for most people it's impossible not to have a car especially when you're not living in urban areas or when you have children.

Hmm...let me see...1.4 Euros/litre...that's about $1.90 USD/litre...that's about $7.20 USD/gallon. You guys are not complaining, are you? :lol:

Nick was leaning against a gurney in a corner of the morgue. The room was dark except for the two islands of light where Atrian and Mimi were still doing their last autopsies. He, himself, had already done three today. At this thought he sighed. Too many people had died... again. His findings had been pretty much the same in all three Cardassian bodies he had examined. All of them had died of wounds inflicted by phaser fire. On top of that, all the bodies had shown signs of a fight...broken bones, contusions, lacerations. Everything suggested that the Cardassians hadn't given up their ship easily. That might have cost their lives. Or, most likely, they would have died anyway. Nick sighed again as he turned to get a coffee. He was glad that both Mimi and Atrian were working on the autopsies as well. They'd have to get together and talk about their findings. Nick didn't expect any surprises. All three of them would probably be able to almost copy their reports. As he stood in front of the replicator and waited for the mug to materialize he remembered that he'd have to write a summary of their findings for Muon and the Captain. He shrugged and then picked up the mug. At least he wouldn't get bored...like there had ever been a danger of that. With the mug of steaming hot coffee in one hand he walked through sickbay and into his office. Instead of watching the others finish their jobs he might as well get some of the paperwork done. It was amazing how many PADDs had piled up during the last week...reports to write, forms to fill out, requests to grant or deny...there was simply no end to it. With one last glance through the open door into sickbay he grabbed a PADD and started reading.

I use Trillian, too (thanks for the tip Kestra)...it's easier than having three or four chat programs running at the same time. The only problem is that there might be some compatibility problems with users using other programs (MSN messenger or Yahoo! Messenger). You might not be able to receive files from everyone for example.

Amreis, seeing the chaos on the Control Tower, decided to check off one of her top To-Do things while everyone is busy. She slipped quietly into a turbo lift, leaving her eager security escort behind, and waited until the doors closed before speaking. "Sickbay," she addressed the computer, and felt the smooth system engage and begin the descent. She sighed, wondering again why she had fallen for this little trick of Starfleets. Her musing was cut short when the doors of the turbolift opened revealing the hallway to Sickbay. Fortunately, it was currently empty as she walked down to and entered the medical center of the station. Nick was just standing at the doors of his office, looking around sickbay. He noticed a woman enter. She looked familiar somehow but he couldn't place her. After thinking for a few seconds he decided she must have been his patient before. Seeing that all the others were busy, Nick walked up to the newcomer and smiled. "What can I do for you?" Amreis winced at the title, "Well, I hope you can help me. I get this sharp pain anytime someone calls me that." She smiled, absently pushing the green lock of hair back behind her ear. "I'm Betile Amreis. I've been shanghaied into service here, and I always make it a point to get to know the doctors, so here I am." Nick grinned. Betile...now he remembered. The science officer who had helped him with the research on the Rixian Plague...what had been her name.....Amelin...Betile Amelin. The resemblance was striking. The woman in front of him looked older but otherwise almost the same, except for the hair. "It's always good to know the doctors, and it's never a bad idea to be nice to them. I haven't had the chance to review your file, yet. I hope there is no medical reason why you come to see the doctors first thing you arrive. As for the pain you get... I fear you'll just have to get used to it. I'm Doctor Lepage, by the way, Nick, if you prefer." She grimaced, "I don't think I'll ever get used to it, Nick. And no, no medical reason specifically. I just don't want to be a virtual stranger if I DO ever need your services... which I probably will at some time." "Everybody needs our services sometime. It's strange how they usually avoid you and as soon as they have the slightest cold they come running to you pretending they are dying." Nick leaned in a bit and continued in a conspiratorial whisper. "It's usually the men who are "dying". You're our new chief of science I take it?" She nodded, "That's what they tell me. So, I suppose being the data gurus you are, you probably also want a baseline scan? And you are.. CMO?" Smiling Nick led Betile to a biobed. "Yes and yes. To be a bit more elaborate...I'd like to get the physical out of the way. It's not so much for the data itself than to have something to compare your vitals to when you're sick. And...yeah...someone was crazy enough to put me in charge of this department. Mind you...it doesn't change much except the amount of paperwork. It's about three times as much as before. Who did you kill that they assigned you to this station?" She blinked, "Recently kill? No one that I can recall. The rest is history. But someone has a wicked sense of karma at Starfleet... and I haven't figured out yet if the Cardassians are the butt of their little joke, or if I am." She took a seat on the biobed, once again pushing back the stray lock of hair that had worked itself loose. Nick picked up a tricorder that was lying next to the biobed and started scanning Betile. "I see I had better be careful around you," he said grinning broadly. "I can understand that being out here can be...problematic for a Bajoran." Just as he had said this Nick noticed some strange readouts as he moved the peripheral along Betile's left arm. "Someone did a pretty good job there," he said pointing at the arm. Briefly, a hard look crossed her face, so quickly as to almost seem to be an aberation. "Hence one of the reasons I like to know the doctors.. and the engineers." The smile returned, "So, how long have you been out here in the smelly armpit of the galaxy?" Nick noticed the brief change of Amreis' expression and he had to admit that he understood her. " I've been out here for...euh...just over two years now. Haven't seen my family since." He lowered the tricorder and frowned. "It's the price you pay for having a job like this. I actually enjoy being here....when the station is not blowing up, that is." The smile turned into a true grin, along with a small chuckle, "This must be your first assignment in Starfleet. Things blow up all over the place. Why don't you take a leave to visit your family?" Nick shrugged. The thought of taking a leave had crossed his mind just after the Breen attack. But with Aegis rebuilt it wasn't reall an otpion...not for him at any rate. "Yes it is my first assignment. To be quite honest, right after the Breen attack I had thought about going back to Earth for good. But then they told us the station would be rebuilt. I couldn't just leave this business unfinished if you like. Then I was made chief and taking a leave now would be impossible. I'll have to live with only reading their letters. I haven't even seen my youngest brother, yet. He was born after I left. "So, then get them to come out here? I know, I know.. the risk. But family is ultimately all you have. Course, that is coming from me, who left husband and child back home on Bajor." She sighed. Nick laughed. "Get my dad to give up his job back in Montreal ? That's the best joke I've heard in ages. Besides, I doubt Starfleet has quarters to accomodate15 people... well 11 if the oldes kids got their own quarters." He shrugged. "I'm glad to know I still have a home back on Earth and I don't even want to know how I would feel if the station was attacked again and they were here. It's better the way it is, trust me." Somewhat glumly, she nodded. "So, what is there to do here in the spare seconds between blowings-up? I don't suppose there's a rock wall?" "Hmm... there's the holodecks. I don't have much time between shifts so I usually eat and sleep. When I have time I go running on the holodeck. As for today...I could show you around the station after my shift." "Holodecks are highly overrated for that kind of thing. But, assuming we don't blow up before the end of the shift, I'd love a tour. It didn't look like I'd be likely to get it from anyone on the Control Tower." Chuckling, Nick put the tricorder aside. "Ah yes, guess they are busy up there what with the attacks. How about I pick you up at your quarters at 1800 hours? I'll show you the station and then we can have dinner...if you don't mind." He smiled and hoped she wouldn't get the idea that he had any hidden agenda. She nodded agreement, and thanking him, left Sickbay.

“Blood, Breen and Rogues” Stardate 0704.09 A joint log by Cdr Muon Quark, Ltn Cdr Nicolas Lepage and Mid Kevin Anderson Anderson, Quark and Lepage beamed over to the transport ship to find out what they could about what had happened. They hadn't been able to get any readings of life signs, all they knew was that the ship had sent out a distress signal. Anderson looked around nervously to check if Quark and Lepage were there too. As he turned towards Lepage Kevin heard Quarks voice: “Away team to Lewis. We're here. Check in every 10 minutes.” Muon and Nick turned on their wrist lights and Anderson got out his tricorder before turning on his as well. In the dim light Nick tried to make out the surroundings. Nothing was moving and PADDs and various other things were strewn across the deck. He sighed, wondering what had happened to the crew. Quark looked about: “ So, the power is out. We should break into three teams.” Upon hearing this Anderson's stomach clenched. He was to go out there all by himself. Just to make sure he asked: ”Is it advisable to go out on our own?” Quark looked at him a tad bemusedly upon being questioned on a matter like this: “ It's a small ship, we'll still be within shouting distance. Plus there were no life forms detected. Should be sfae enough.” Anderson flushed which was fortunately hidden by the darkness that surrounded them, he was mad at himself for not being able to hide his uncertainty: “I'm sorry, I'm just a bit nervous because this is my first away mission.” He thought that the truth would be better than Quark thinking he was prone to insubordination. Quark nodded and now understood Anderson's behaviour: “No problem Kevin. You have to go on your first AT some time. I'll take the bridge. Why don't you take engineering Kevin and the Doc can look into the medical files... Or crew quarters. Call if you need help” Feeling a bit more secure now Anderson said: “Shall do, I'll go see what I can find in engineering:” Nick nodded. "I'll see what I can find out but I have a hunch that I won't find anything but records of routine physicals and minor inuries. If I'm lucky I'll find some clue as to what happened in the quarters." He was already walking in the direction of sickbay as he said this. His steps were echoing in the quiet, deserted ship. The away team broke up. Quark examined the bridge, Anderson engineering and Lepage the crew quarters and sickbay. At a first glance all of them found the same. PADDs on the floor, broken consoles, signs of fights all over the ship. Whatever the reason for the crew's disappearance, they didn't go voluntarily. He stepped over some debris and entered sickbay. As he stepped up to a console he realized that any attempt to acess the files would be futile with no power. So, he decided to have the data sent to the Lewis once an minimal power would be restored. From sickbay Nick only had to walk a little further down the corridor to get to the crew quarters. It would be almost impossible to find anything useful in here. Furniture, PADDs and debris lay strewn all over the place. The chaos was worse than what his brothers and sisters were able to produce when left unattended for a while...and that was saying something. Nick kept poking around the rooms for a while, hoping he'd stumble across something useful. In the silence of the abandoned bridge Quark tried to get some systems back online, after working on a console for a couple of minutes all of a sudden she heard a voice. She turned around being startled by it and then realised she'd come across the vessel's Captain's recording. The Captain said: “ We've encountered two unknown ships, they're not responding to hails and they've locked a tractor beam on us.” After that the recording became more and more disturbed by static. “It s..ms we're.. boarded.” Then suddenly his voice rose: “Oh God no!.. Can't b..live ..t's ..em...t's th...” After that the recording broke off. Quark turned it off giving a frustrated grunt. Now that didn't get them much further. She looked around the bridge. At least all the debris lying around made some sense now. Someone had boarded the ship and abducted the crew. Quark had just started to wonder if the others had come up with more when she heard Anderson call for her and Lepage. While Quark had been busy on the bridge Anderson had taken a look around engineering. He, too, had found debris lying about, there were signs of struggles all over the ship. But the reason why he had called out for Quark was something he had found while examining some of the debris. It seemed like at least one of the fights had not gone over without bloodshed. “Look at what I found just as I left the bridge to come over here”, she said as she entered engineering. Kevin looked up to see Lepage and Quark enter. Quark held something up. “What do you think this is Kevin?” Kevin too it in his hand but was too excited about his find to examine it further: “This might give us a clue on who is responsible. Look!” Quark looked at a dark stain on the floor: “Blood?” “Yes.” Kevin exclaimed excitedly. “Looks like someone got a punch on the nose during a fight, if it was one of the attackers the Doc should be able to tell us who the attackers were.” Nick crouched beside the stain and looke dat it before taking a sample. "Whoever was hurt must have been moving. The traces suggest he was moving...that way." He pointed toward the exit. Quark watched as Lepage took a sample and her mood improved a little bit. Finally they were getting somewhere. Lepage frowned as he looked up at Muon. "Hmm...it's Breen." He checked the readouts of his tricorder again and shrugged. "Yes, there's no doubt about it. This blood is definitely Breen." Neither of them could really believe that. This didn't look like a Breen attack. After all they all knew what Aegis looked like after the Breen had been through with it. Quark checked in with the Lewis before expressing her intention to examine the cargo bay. So Anderson and Lepage followed her over to it. Frowning Anderson turned his attention to the item Quark had found on the bridge and handed to him for examination while he walked behind Lepage. As they reached the cargo bay they found it to be empty except for some carelessly tossed aside, empty boxes. While Muon and Kevin remained standing close to the entrance Nick wandered further into the empty cargo bay. He kept scanning the deck and blukheads for organic material. Quark looked over at Anderson: “Can you make sense of all this? Breen looting a transport ship?” Anderson held up the communicator: “Well, I think I might have an explanation.” Quark made a gesture that prompted him to go on: “ This communicator is Breen in design, but still slightly modified. It seems like some sort of badge which is meant for only a certain group of people.I think we're dealing with a group of rogue Breen. They use this as a way of identification. It's very much like wearing a uniform or a flag or something of that sort. It's a sign of unity or individuals for the same cause...” At this Quark cut him short: “I understand, thank you Kevin but I think it's time we head back for the Lewis. I'll make sure the vessel will be towed in for further inspection.” Anderson looked abashed, he knew he had gotten carried away only too keen to contribute something to the mission. He just stood there and nodded. Lepage joined the other two at the entrance. He hadn't found anything. As he said so Muon simply nodded. She obviously hadn't expected anything else. Neither had he. They got ready to beam back over to the Lewis after successfully finishing their away mission. At least they had been able to shed some light on what had happened here. Back on the Lewis arrangements would be made to take the transport ship along with them to Aegis for further inspection.

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday!

Nick entered the office eyeing the pile of PADDs on his desk suspiciously. It was incredible. They had just arrived from the Gamma Quadrant and his new desk was already littered with paperwork. He took a deep breath as he sat down and grabbed the first PADD. It was a list of medical supplies that would be delivered within the next 48 hours. Nick read it quickly and made a mental note to consult this list as soon as he'd get Mimi's list of the stuff they still needed. The next PADD was a note that said that people had tried to contact him. He wasn't surprised. The news of the latest events must have reached Earth ages ago. Certainly, his family and friends were worried and had tried to find out whether he'd been among the casualties. Nick scrolled down the list and one name immediately caught his eye. Doctor DJ McKinny, CMO, Eglin, Florida. A wide smile spread on his face. This would give him an excuse to contact DJ. He reached out for the console on his desk and asked the operations officer for a subspace communication to DJ. A couple of minutes later the screen lit up again and DJ's face appeared. The smile on Nick's face grew even wider. "Hello Doctor DJ McKinny, CMO, Eglin, Florida, this is Doctor Nick Lepage, CMO, Aegis, the middle of nowhere. I see you've tried to reach me." Nick grinned as he said this. As he carefully watched DJ's reaction he felt a pang of regret. The events of the last weeks had not left him much time to think about it but he missed DJ more than he ever thought he would. DJ didn't believe it until she saw his face. Even when her secretary rushed into the office to tell her she had a real time comm from Aegis, she wouldn't allow herself to believe it was true. After weeks of silence, she was finally looking at and talking to Nick Lepage. DJ couldn't begin to describe the relief she felt. Word of Aegis's destruction quickly spread like wildfire around all of Starfleet's facilities. Almost everyone at Eglin knew that DJ had just come from a tour on Aegis. They tried to be positive and upbeat about the dreadful news but nothing could assuage DJ's grief over the causality reports. The station had been almost completely destroyed. There was not much left of it.... hundreds dead and even more injured. Some of those wounded would never completely recover. And then there was the emotional trauma such a disaster leaves behind in its wake. She had no doubt many would resign from Starfleet. Others would wait until they'd served their time and choose not to re-up. A lot of the civilians who called Aegis home might decide to move to a more secure location. But the worst part of it all was the silence. DJ tried valiantly to get information about Aegis. All she knew for certain was that the station was gone. Just two weeks earlier, she'd finally gotten her hands on a causality list. But it offered nothing more than preliminary estimates on the number of survivors, injured and deceased. There were no names available and the report indicated the figures were probably inaccurate....they anticipated an increase in the number of deceased and a decrease in the number of survivors. Dr. McKinny almost wished she had never read the report. All it did was make matters worse. Then, a few days ago, she got wind of an unofficial report that Aegis was once again open for business. She immediately sent a message to the Nick. She could only pray he was among the survivors. And now, here he was, in the flesh, grinning at her like he used to when she caught him up to no good. She fought back the tears and smiled as she leaned forward, resting her arms on the desk. "Where have you been?" she demanded in as harsh a voice as she could muster. Nick could tell that DJ was relieved to see him despite the tone in her voice. He guessed she was trying to sound harsh but it was obvious she was struggling with her emotions. He decided to stop trying to be funny. DJ must have gone to hell and back the last couple of weeks, not knowing what was going on. She had been aboard Aegis for over a year. She must be worried about her friends out here. "DJ, I'm truly sorry I didn't get to contact you sooner. I didn't have time. Most of us were picked up by ships in the vicinity and in the end all Aegis personnel was transferred to the Lewis. We went after the Breen and there was just no way I could get a message through to you from the Gamma Quadrant." Nick paused. This was not just some excuse, it was the truth. He took a deep breath and swallowed hard, bracing himself for the question he was sure DJ would ask next. She lowered her head, embarassed by her tone of voice. She had no right to speak harshly to Nick. As frightened as she'd been, she knew it had been far worse for him and the others who survived the attack on the station. "I'm sorry," she said quickly. "I didn't mean to come across that way. And you don't have to explain anything. I'm sure you had your hands full." She looked at him closely. He seemed to be okay but looks could be deceiving. "How are you? she asked, genuinely concerned. "How is Mimi and the others in the Medical Section?" Nick shook his head. "You don't have to apologise, DJ. I just want you to know that I didn't forget to tell you. It was impossible." He took a deep breath, not sure whether he should just tell DJ that he was fine or go for the truth. He decided it was time for the truth. "I'd like to answer your second question first because that's the easier one to answer. Mimi is alright, so are Myron, Robin and Mary-Alice. Finn decided to leave us. He got an offer to transfer to a ship and he took it. I don't blame him. Grissom...didn't make it. There were some casualties in the Beta and Gamma shifts, too." As Nick spoke, DJ could picture the faces of everyone he mentioned. She swallowed hard when he told her about Grissom. A part of her wanted to know the names of those lost from the Beta and Gamma shifts. But she opted not to ask. Nick paused again. He wasn't sure how to begin telling DJ about himself. When he looked back up he saw DJ watching him closely. How he missed her advice and guidance. Before he knew it he started talking. "I don't think I've ever needed you more than now, DJ. I'm not sure I'm ready for this. You know, after the attack I seriously considered quitting. This was the second time I almost died out here, not counting the time when Commander Hawke attacked me. What if next time I don't make it? Or worse yet, what if most of my staff don't make it?" Nick sighed. He didn't know whether he had managed to convey his emotions and doubts. "I need a vacation," he added hardly above a whisper. DJ dropped her head again and took a deep breath. She could tell from the expression on Nick's face that his confidence had taken a huge hit. The station had come under attack just days after Nick first arrived on Aegis. Then, as now, there had been heavy damage and numerous causalities. It was a nerve wracking incident for long time personnel. But it badly rattled the younger, less experienced officers such as Nick. And now, history had repeated itself. The only difference was, Nick was no longer inexperienced. He'd proven himself time and time again, performing admirably in dangerous situations on numerous occasions. It appeared he'd forgotten that part of the equation. McKinny lifted her head and looked Nick in the eye. "I can understand you wanting to take a vacation," she said softly. "That might not be a bad idea although, I doubt they would let you go right now...not with the reopening of the station underway." She leaned forward as though that would somehow bridge the light years separating them. "And I'm flattered beyond words that you miss me. I must admit, I miss you too." She paused a moment, searching for the right words....words of encouragement... words that would remind Nick of how far he'd come and how good he was at his job. "I can't tell you what to do," she continued trying to sound as positive as possible. "But I can tell you that you are most definitely cut out for the job. You can handle it blindfolded with one hand tied behind your back. That's just how good you are. Believe me, I know." She shook her head slightly. "It may be difficult under the circumstances, but try to look to the future, not the past. And remember, tragedies strike all of us, no matter where we are. Even if you quit, that's no guarantee trouble won't be waiting for you around the corner." She had planned to say more but couldn't find the words. More than anything, she suddenly wished she was there to give him a hug and reassure him that everything would be okay. Nick shook his head. He was not entirely convinced but he couldn't help smiling despite himself. It felt good to hear someone believed in him. "You're right, trouble could be waiting for me around the corner even if I quit and went back to Earth. The difference out here is that it seems I'm looking for trouble instead of it waiting for me. You know what I mean. If there's another Breen attack Aegis is most likely going to be their first target again." He frowned thinking carefully before he went on. "DJ, I never meant to bring this up but...after what happened, you know, with the Cairo, how did you manage to take another assignment without going insane, worrying that the same thing might happen again?" He forced himself to keep eye contact, trying to read her expression. He knew the Cairo incident had been different. On top of being severely injured DJ had lost her husband and probably many close friends. Still, he thought that DJ of all people would be able to understand his doubts and concerns. And there it was......Cairo......Jack's death not to mention just about everyone else on the ship. The destruction of the USS Cairo was DJ's Achilles Heel. It was the single most devastating experience of her life and she wasn't sure she'd tell Nick the truth about how she "managed." The fact was, she didn't handle it well at all. For years, DJ thought about Jack and the Cairo everyday...several times a day. But not anymore. Now, the memories surfaced occasionally and she was glad of that. She would never forget nor did she want to. But she had finally reached the point where that one incident no longer governed her life. In spite of that fact, the mere mention of the word was still painful for DJ, more painful than she would ever admit to Nick or anyone else for that matter. It felt like a serrated dagger was being thrust into her chest and then twisted back and forth to enlarge the gaping wound. But DJ wasn't about to let Nick know about that. Maybe at some point in the future, she would be able to confide in him, but not now....not under these circumstances. She knew he was watching her closely, looking for any sign of distress. And there was no way to hide it completely. Perhaps it was best not to. At least Nick would see that life after disasters is possible. She smiled sadly as her eyes moistened. "It was difficult, Nick," she began, carefully choosing her words. "There are differences between what happened to me on Cairo and what you've gone through on Aegis. There are also similarities. But it was difficult and I won't tell you otherwise." DJ hesitated a moment and glanced across her office to the large painting of an alien landscape hanging over the sofa. That same painting once hung in her office on Aegis. Truth be told, she had never asked for permission to take it with her when she left. But here it was, light years away from where she had first seen it, a daily reminder of the months she spent on the far side of the galaxy. It suddenly occurred to her that had she not brought it with her, it would probably have been destroyed in the Breen attack on Aegis. Turning her attention back to the small view screen, she met Nick's gaze head-on. "I had to decide what I wanted to do," she continued. "I chose to remain in Starfleet. To do that, I had to climb out of that pit of self pity and get back on the horse that threw me. Was I scared, you bet. But do I reget my decision? No, not in the least." She smiled slightly at the handsome face looking back at her from across the galaxy. "And that's what you have to do, Nick. You have to make that decision. Nobody else can do it for you." Nick nodded. It hadn't escaped him that the mention of the Cairo had obviously stirred painful memories. He was almost sorry that he had brought up the subject. It wasn't fair of him to remind her of this. But he couldn't take back the words now. He wondered whether he should mention to DJ that he had seriously considered, was still considering as a matter of fact, the possibility of requesting transfer back to Earth to be closer to her. He decided not to. After all, for all he knew DJ might have met someone else. Or maybe she wasn't really interested. Besides, he had a feeling that he wouldn't be happy back on Earth, not now. It just wasn't the right time. He had some unfinished business out here and he was certain that he'd regret quitting at this point. Still, Nick hesitated to make a final decision. Mostly because of his feelings for DJ. The Breen attack had reminded him that he, too was mortal and that maybe he didn't have as much time left as he thought. He was sorely tempted to take the easy way out, resign and settle down on Earth. He could stay home and raise the children while DJ pursued her quest of saving lives. Suddenly Nick became aware of DJ watching him. She had allowed him some time to think before continuing, taking a deep breath and smiling confidently. "Promise me one thing," she said lightly. "Promise me you'll let me know what you plan to do, okay?" She wanted to say more but didn't. She wanted to tell him she would find a place for him at Eglin if he chose to transfer off Aegis. She could always use another physician with Nick's skills. But it wasn't fair of her to dangle that carrot in front of him. It would just put additional pressure on him and that was the last thing he needed right now. Nick sighed. "I have a few ideas of what I'd like to do but that's not quite the same as what I feel I have to do. I haven't made up my mind yet but trust me, you'll be the first one to know once I've made a decision." As much as DJ didn't want to admit it, there was another reason she refrained from offering Nick a position at Eglin. She didn't think she could deal with the disappointment of hearing him turn her down. If he chose to leave Aegis, she would take the risk of inviting him to Eglin. Until then, well.....some things were better off left unsaid. DJ's smile brightened. "And if you decide to take a vacation, I can highly recommend the beaches in this area. They're absolutely wonderful!" Nick chuckled despite himself. He raised his eyebrows and pretended to be surprised. "I know the true reason for you saying this, Doctor McKinny. You can't fool me. You just want me to cook dinner for you again. Admit it!" His face split into a wide smile, he leaned closer, looked around as if making sure noone was listening and continued in a whisper. "I've already got a good idea what the menu'll be like next time."