DrDMatthews

Deb was in a foul mood.....had been for hours....days even. Now that she was back on the ship, she was still in a foul mood. This mission had launched her into an emotional whirlwind. The ten plus hours spent shifting through debris on that scorching sand pile masquerading as a planet had done absolutely nothing but exacerbate her already lousy mood. She had never been overly fond of forensic analysis gathering. The meticulousness of that particular task was better left to the experts. But when the specialists were unavailable, the job usually fell to the medical staff and in Deb's experience, the experts were always unavailable. She glanced at the "evidence" she and Merina had managed to collect. There were nearly a hundred specimens all neatly packed away in air tight bags. They were clearly labeled as to the date and time they were found as well as where they were located. Some were as large as a forearm and an ankle. Most were much smaller, tiny remnants of bone and skin or the slight remains of various internal organs. There were also several teeth. Some evidence was so miniscule as to be unrecognizable to anything other than the tricorder. They had taken the machine's word for it when the tricorder insisted the microscopic dot they were looking at was indeed biologic evidence that had once belonged to a living being. Deb watched as Dr. Studly laboriously logged each item and carefully placed it on the gurney he'd brought with him into her office. From here, Rocco would personally escort them to the labs then round up a team to begin a thorough study of each piece of the evidence. Some would be easier than other but, before all was said and done, they would know the species of each being represented in those little bags, their gender and age and hopefully, their names. The last was nothing but a wish. Not all of those lost on that ship were in Starfleet's DNA data base. Millions of beings were registered there but many millions more were not. Merina came to the door and knocked. Deb waved her in. The Caitian leaned against the door jamb and quietly watched Studly as he worked. She'd survived an attack on that godforsaken planet as well as a ship crashing practically on top of her. Other than the dirt and grime clinging to her usually lustrous fur, Merina looked none the worse for what she'd gone through. It took a bit under thirty minutes for Studly to finish his log, check it against the one on Deb's tricorder and then take himself and the evidence off to the lab. "Good riddance," she thought. In her current frame of mind, Deb hoped to never again see the contents of those little bags. She leaned back in chair and looked at Merina. "Why don't you go take a shower and get some rest?" It was phrased as a question but her tone left no room for discussion. "And later, we're going to discuss whether or not anyone from this department should be allowed to accompany Jon Shamor on any future away teams." Merina didn't argue. Instead, she turned and slowly walked toward the main entrance. But a strange sound came rambling from deep in her chest as she left. Deb wasn't sure if it was a groan, a growl or a laugh. She didn't bother asking either. The CMO shook her head and forced herself to stand. As much as she hated to admit it, she was sore in places she'd forgotten she had. She followed Merina's trail to the exit glancing around Sickbay as she went. Rocco was still there, standing by the gurney loaded with the precious evidence. He as talking to someone on his comm. She assumed he was gathering the team needed to examine the samples. He happened to look up and Deb waved to him letting him know she was leaving and he would be in charge for awhile. How long before she returned as anyone's guess. She knew it would be at least a couple of hours. It would probably take that long to clean the dirt and stink off her body. A few minutes later, she entered her quarters and found it....dark. For a nanosecond, Deb was concerned. Aidan said he was going directly to their quarters for a shower. But it appeared nobody was here. That's when she noticed the dim light coming from the bedroom. He was here after all. She slowly made her way through the living area, not bothering to order the lights on. When she arrived at the door to the bedroom, she found Aidan standing beside the bed, studying something on his padd that must have been extremely important because he didn't hear her approach. She leaned against the door and stared at him appreciatively. He'd already taken his shower and now stood in the dim light with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. For the first time in quite awhile, Deb couldn't resist smiling.

The days were rough......the nights were even worse. While on duty, Deb usually had enough to do to keep her mind preoccupied. There should always be something going on in Sickbay. Although, truth be told, the ship's state of the art medical facility was rather empty these days. So, instead of treating patients, Deb was catching up on reports and a trying desperately to concentrate on various journal articles that she should have read months ago. Reading was something of a problem. Aidan's condition was never far from the center of her thoughts but, after a while, she was able to discipline herself to worry about him only once or twice every couple of minutes. But the nights....oh the nights were a different story altogether. Once she was back in their quarters, there was no getting away from the problem. Aidan was right there.... in living color...trying desperately to remember the last nine years of his life. And included in those nine years was his marriage to Deb. He'd had a few flashbacks. Apparently they involved his wife...in a rather intimate manner. So, although he confessed to the flashbacks, he stubbornly refused to divulge the details. Deb opted not to force the issue. She could only hope his flashbacks would start expanding into other areas of his life as well. In the meantime..... She'd returned the hideous nightgown to Gracie....laundered and neatly folded. She'd even managed to keep to herself any snide remarks about how ugly it was. After all, it had been an emergency and she had roused Gracie from a dead sleep. It was quite likely the poor woman wasn't fully awake when she snatched that awful thing out of a drawer and shoved it into Deb's hands. Also, she had a feeling she might need Gracie's assistance in the future. Now she had a couple of cute yet modest pairs of pajamas to sleep in....something she wasn't embarrassed to be seen in. But the pajamas had no effect on her inability to sleep. She had tossed and turned every night since Aidan's injury. There had been nights in the past when she'd suffered from insomnia but those occasions were few and far between. But now, she had to be so exhausted she could barely hold up her head before she could even consider sleeping. Even after she nodded off, she'd wake up an hour or so later, tossing and turning. This night was no different from the rest. She finally fallen asleep and now she was again awake. She rolled onto her side, her back to Aidan. A minute or so later, she was on her stomach and then back on her side. She was still moving around trying to get comfortable when she felt something on the small of her back. It was a hand.....his hand....lightly patting her much as a parent would a child. Deb couldn't even breathe. This was her husband's hand. This was what her husband used to do to comfort her on those nights when she tossed and turned until the wee hours of the morning. She forced herself to remain perfectly still anxiously waiting to what, if anything, would happen next. A couple of minutes later, he removed his hand. Deb waited a full five minutes before slowly and quietly rolling onto her back. Aidan didn't stir so she risked turning onto her side, facing him. His hand was palm down on the bed between them. She watched him for another few minutes. His breathing was slow and even. He appeared to be asleep. She assumed his actions had been governed by his subconscious. But that was a good thing, wasn't it. The memories were there....not so far away...hiding just below the surface....waiting patiently to escape from their prison and flow freely once again into his consciousness.. She had no idea why, but she reached out and rested her hand on top of his. He immediately pulled it away. Her disappointment was palpable. Then, much to her surprise, he covered her hand with his and wrapped his fingers around hers. She was stunned and far more pleased than she had a right to be. She stole a glance at his face. He was still sleeping. She watched him fro a few seconds and then again turned her attention to their hands. That's what she was looking at when sleep finally came and there was no more tossing and turning that night.

By Aidan Ridire & Deb Matthews Aidan stifles a yawn as he looks out at the stars. He turns to glance at Deb "I assume the bedroom is that door there behind you. If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go find some clothes to change into and then take a shower before turning in." He walks past her and enters the bedroom. He doesn’t advance more then a few feet into the room before he stops. He frowns as he stares at the bed for a few seconds. Turning his attention away from the bed he walks over to the drawers that should hold his clothes. He’s just about to open one of the drawers when he pauses again. He murmurs "This could be her clothes..." He glances at the door he came through and adds "Well, this will be awkward...." Deb didn't quite know what to say. It had been a long day....a very long day. Of course he was tired. So was she. But the fact of the matter was, she hadn't given much thought to "bedtime." She followed him as she stepped into the bedroom but paused at the doorway, her heart nearly breaking as he looked around, obviously confused about where his clothes were kept. She caught herself holding her breath, hoping he would remember but he didn't. He started toward a set of drawers on the left side of the door, her drawers. She was just about to speak up when he suddenly stopped and looked in her direction. He mumbled something but she was unable to hear what he said. "Your things are in these drawers," she said, her voice as calm as she could manage. She pointed to the drawers on the other side of the door. "And you have clothes hanging on the right side of the closet as well." And then it hit her like a phaser on full. She wasn't sure Aidan had any proper pajamas. She thought he did but he so rarely used them, it was quite possible he'd gotten rid of them. She certainly hadn't seen them in... she couldn't remember when she'd last seen them. And if that wasn't bad enough, Deb was absolutely positive she didn't have anything "modest" enough to wear to bed with a man who was, for all intents and purposes, a stranger. She felt her face grow from warm to downright hot and knew she must be as red as a tomato. Quickly turning around, her mind desperately searched for a solution....and it had to be quick. He watches the emotions flit across her expression. Sighing to himself, he says "For what it’s worth, I’m sorry you’re going through this." He steps towards the indicated drawers and opens them to rifle through them. Finally he finds a t-shirt and a knee length pair of shorts after not finding any sort of pajamas. He glances at her again to find that she turned away. Misinterpreting her action he says "I’ll go change in the bathroom." He closes the drawer and turns towards the bathroom door. As he does so his gaze falls on the bed again and he freezes in mid-motion as a very brief and vivid image floats before his eyes. Finally he snaps out of it and he shakes his head twice as he feels a blush crawl up the back of his neck. His apology struck her as ironic. He couldn't remember anything from the last nine plus years yet he was sorry she was having to go through this. Well, truth be told, he wasn't any sorrier than she was! He may have lost his memory but, for all intents and purposes, she'd lost her husband. Still, she couldn't imagine how alone he must feel, especially on a ship where he didn't know a soul yet they all knew him. And if the situation was reversed....well....she couldn't even begin to imagine how awful it would be. Although he couldn't remember her, it was kind of him to express concern for her feelings. It was also a reminder that she wasn't controlling her own emotions very well....not if this total stranger could pick up on every expression. But Aidan had always been a gentleman so she shouldn't have been surprised. She turned around to speak to him but he was almost to the bathroom. He'd paused for a moment and seemed lost in thought. She held her breath hoping he was remembering something but then he moved on to bathroom with a slight shake of his head. "Is everything okay?" asked Deb hesitantly. She didn't want to make him feel any worse but she couldn't help thinking he might have had a flash back of some kind. If so, it could indicate his memory was on the verge of returning. He pauses slightly, trying to figure out how to answer the question. He knows she has the right to know...but he didn’t exactly know how to answer the question without it making even more awkward between them. The image..if that’s what it was..was an intensely personal one. So in the end he just steps into the bathroom and closes the door behind him. She just stood there silently, watching him enter the bathroom and close the door. He frowns darkly as he enters the bathroom. If that was something from his lost memory he’s surprised that Deb didn’t notice his embarrassment. That was an intensely personal image that flashed before his eyes as he look

"Oh god.....something's wrong," thought Deb. Truth be told, it was just another problem to add to the list. At the top of that list was the fact her injured husband lay unconscious on a biobed while Deb stood twenty feet away trying to maintain her composure. "Official Starfleet protocol" forbade her from offering medical assistance to Aidan because of their close, personal relationship, unless of course, there was no alternative. Even if there wasn't an "official Starfleet protocol," Deb wouldn't allow herself to go near the man. She was sure to do him more harm than good. Her heart pounding against her chest like it was trying to escape from her body. She even had to remind herself to keep breathing. There was a good possibility Aidan was in better condition than she was. Deb kept her distance even though it was nearly killing her. She didn't want to get in the way of Studly and his team who were quickly and efficiently evaluating Aidan's condition. She kept a close eye on her unconscious husband but she kept an even closer eye on the physician. Rocco had run a hyperencephalogram....twice. The test was routine for head trauma. Nor was it unusual to duplicate the test in order to insure accurate data. The current data was then compared to results from a previously conducted test, usually the hyperencephalogram taken during the patient's annual physical. The data should match perfectly. Aidan's didn't. Deb could tell by the way Studly reacted as she scrutinized the information. Rocco's eyes rarely reflected emotion. But his jaw certainly did. After working with him for so many years, Deb was able to discern the subtle nuances of her colleague's facial movements. He'd just clinched his jaw so tightly, Deb was surprised his teeth weren't clattering to the floor. The handsome physician quickly regained control by taking two or three deep breaths. Then he looked at Deb. Studly nodded toward a console nearly on the other side of the room. He strode over to it and activated it. The data he required came on screen just as the CMO joined him. Deb's heart was now firmly in her throat, threatening to fly out of her mouth if she dared open it. She ordered herself to take deep breaths as she kept her eyes on Rocco. She was genuinely terrified to look at the data clearly displayed on the console. There was only one reason Studly would bring her to this relatively quiet spot to show her this information. Obviously, there was brain damage. Rocco lightly placed a hand on Deb's shoulder and gently turned her toward the small screen. The CMO forced herself to look at it. Neither of them had to say a word. The difference in the two scans was as plain as the nose on Deb's face. The discrepancy was relatively minor but it was definitely present and they both knew exactly what this particular anomaly indicated. The patient would awaken with amnesia. The human brain still carefully guarded some of its secrets. The hyperencephalogram might be able to indicate the presence of amnesia but it wasn't able to discern how severe it might be. For that, they would have to wait until the patient awakened. In some case, patients with relatively petty discrepancies suffered major memory loss whereas others, with extreme discrepancies, had very little memory deficiencies. "This could have been worse....a lot worse," said Rocco in a quiet yet encouraging voice. Deb nodded but said nothing. There were too many variables running through her head. Aidan's amnesia was definitely post traumatic. But would it be anterograde amnesia or retrograde or a combination of both? Would he be able to form and retain new memories? "No, it won't be that bad," she thought knowing all the while that yes, it could very well be just that bad. She closed her eyes and leaned against the small desk. After beating so wildly, Deb felt like her heart would surely stop at any moment. "Why don't you get some rest," suggested Rocco as he turned off the console. "We'll call you when he wakes up." Again, Deb nodded and opened her eyes. "Thanks," she replied in a hoarse whisper. She remained where she was as Dr. Studly walked back to his patient, his patient who happened to be Deb's husband. "Will he remember me?" she mused silently, staring at the unconscious man on the biobed across the room. "And what will I do if he doesn't?" She watched the medical team work on Aidan for several minutes, her emotions swinging wildly from terror to furious with every possible stop in between. Closing her eyes, she made a conscious decision to focus on the anger. "What was he doing in that shuttle? Weren't there other pilots available to fly the mission? Of course there were! So who's brilliant idea was it for Aidan to fly? She would find out and wring their neck! And when Aidan recovered, she would wring his too! That's the least he deserved for scaring her like this!" Through out her silent tirade, there was one key word was the focal point....."recover." Aidan simply had to recover. She would find a way to help Aidan recover his memory, no matter how much of it he'd lost. With her fists clenched tightly, Deb mustered her composure and headed across Sickbay. She allowed herself one quick glance toward her husband before stepping inside in her office. She leaned heavily against the door after it closed behind her. After a moment or two, she purposefully walked to her desk and activated her console. She was calm now. Still concerned for her husband but no longer scared to death. Now she was steeled for battle. Whatever it took, she would find a way to resolve this problem. She was determined to fix Aidan no matter what. She would win this war if it killed her.

Debbie hoped no one on the bridge noticed the steam billowing from her ears as she left the Ready Room. She made a conscious effort to walk normally, not gallop, across the bridge to the turbo lift. And above all else, she made certain to avoid eye contact with anyone and everyone there. The CMO was borderline livid and she wasn't entirely sure why. She'd known Jon Shamor was in the Ready Room along with the Captain and Aidan. The CO's feeble attempt to insinuate he wasn't..."I haven't seen him"....did little to relieve her concerns about Jon's safety and well being. The Zemun was invisible! Of course McQueen hadn't seen him. But he had spoken to him. Deb was as sure of that as she was her own name. If she had stayed in that room for another moment, she would probably have thrown something at the Captain.. The lift doors opened with their customary swish and she stepped inside immediately ordering it to Sickbay. A moment later, she remembered the look on Aidan's face when she told him she didn't trust him...at least not now....not in this particular situation. Those dashing green eyes of his revealed a mixture of hurt, disappointment and anger. Deb quickly ordered the lift to Deck 4. She needed a few minutes of privacy to consider what had just happened in the Ready Room and the possible consequences. Sickbay could wait. A few seconds later, she exited the lift and made the short trek to her quarters. The sensor recognized her and opened the door immediately. She hurried inside angrily tossing her tricorder on the sofa as she marched through the living area and into the bedroom. Deb sat down heavily on the edge of the bed. She was no longer thinking about Jon Shamor. Now, all she could worry about was Aidan and the damage her words may have done to their relationship. She was only vaguely aware of Nephyts jumping onto the bed. Deb ignored her, lost in thought about what she'd said to her husband. Had he ever lied to her? Had he ever said or done anything to create doubt her mind? The answer was a resounding no. So why couldn't she trust him now? He assured her Jon wouldn't leave the ship until his current problem was rectified. Why did she doubt what he said? Had Aidan decided Jon would remain aboard ship? Was she afraid the Captain would override that decision? The ever persistent Nephyts maneuvered herself onto Debbie's lap and sat down facing her mistress. Deb looked down into the feline's lovely blue eyes and sighed. "I've messed up," she groaned softly. "He wouldn't have said it unless he knew for certain Jon wasn't going anywhere." Nephyts meowed softly in agreement then promptly curled herself into a tight little ball on Deb's lap. It was now as plain as the nose on her face. She'd been so annoyed, she let her tongue take control of her brain. Aidan was trying to let her know that he and the Captain not only understood her concerns regarding Jon Shamor, they agreed with her that he shouldn't leave the ship. In short, she was getting her way on this one. In return, she behaved like an idiot. She opened her mouth and inserted her foot all the way to her knee. Now she owed both the Captain and the XO an apology as well as a thank you for doing the right thing. Deb could only hope the CO would shrug it off. The XO was another matter. "Next time," she mumbled to Nephyts as she stroked the Siamese's silky coat. "Remind me not to marry the executive officer of the ship I'm working on." The cat looked up at her like she was nuts. "I know," continued Debbie softly. "There isn't going to be a next time. He's the only husband I have or will ever have. At least I hope so. After that debacle in the Ready Room, he probably wishes I was as invisible as Shamor." Shamor! Holy smokes.....Shamor!! Deb abruptly dumped Nephyts onto the bed and jumped to her feet. "Sorry baby but I've got to go," she said to the cat who now looked at her with an obviously condescending glare. "If they play this by the book, and I think they just might, Jon could be on his way to Sickbay." She stood in front of the antique cheval mirror near the door, a wedding gift from one of Aidan's relatives and hurriedly brushed off her uniform trying to remove as much cat hair as possible. "I've got to get there before he does. Nobody down there knows about his little problem," she continued as she rushed out of the room. "I don't even want to think about how much mischief he could cause."

Aidan, sitting on the couch, is playing a game of chess by himself when the door opens and Deb walks in. He finishes making a move and spins the turntable he had set the chess board around before he looks up. Smiling, he stands and moves to hug her and kiss her gently. "I trust chili will do for supper? How was your day?" Deb eagerly stepped into her husband's arms and rested her cheek against his broad chest. "Chili is fine," she mumbled. "As far as how my day was, I'd rather wait until I've eaten before I go into that." She pulled away slightly and looked up at him frowning slightly. "Suffice to say it was....a little strange. I'll tell you about it at dinner." He nods and leads her to the dining table. He brings the steaming bowl of chili over to the table where the dishes and the drinks are waiting. Then he pulls out her chair and waits for her to sit. He smiles "You don’t have to tell me at all if you wish." "I don't mind telling you about it," said Deb breathing in the aromatic smell of the chili. "I hope you didn't make this too hot," she added quickly with a smile. "And I'm not talking about heat....I'm talking about flavor." He smiles "No, I did not go overboard on making it spicy. I made it exactly the same as I did last time and I don’t remember you drinking copious amounts of water then." His smile turns mischievous and he purrs "It would be mildly entertaining to do that sometime...but the price I’d pay for it would be too high. I don’t need an annoyed wife on my hands. Things work out better for me if I keep her content." She watched quietly as Aidan put a couple of healthy ladles full of chili into her waiting bowl. "Did you know Kat thought you hated her?" He stops ladling the chili and stares at Deb for a few seconds. "Kat thinks....I hate her?" He closes his eyes and shakes his head twice as he digests that. Opening his eyes he remarks "If I hated her she’d be off this ship in a heartbeat." He frowns as he dishes the rest of the food and sits down in his chair. Debbie blew softly on the chili piled high on her spoon. "I know that," she said never taking her eye off her spoon. She gingerly tested the chili. Finding it adequately cooled, she cleaned off the spoon and looked at her husband. She was about to compliment him on the chili but was taken aback by the distressed expression on his face. "Kat isn't thinking straight, Aidan. She agreed to talk to Carolyn. I'm hoping that will help." He frowns and shakes his head. Sighing quietly he says "Sorry, I guess I never exactly dealt with the situation emotionally. And I guess it didn't occur to me how she'd view my actions." He sits down and dishes his own supper. "Hopefully Carolyn will be able to help, yes." After a few seconds of pensive thought he starts eating his supper. "I may be wrong," said Deb while stirring her chili. "But I believe Kat was thinking more about her behavior than your reaction to it." She again filled her spoon and carefully lifted it to her mouth. After swallowing the chili gently placed the spoon in the bowl and reached for Aidan's hand. "Maybe you should talk to her." He considers that suggestion for a minute, remembering the last several "talks" he had with Ms. Schawnsee. Finally he nods "Yeah, that’s probably best. Though let me know when would be a good time or have Carol let me know. I don’t want to make the problem worse for Kat." He squeezes Deb’s hand, drawing some comfort from it. Debbie returned the squeeze and smiled warmly at her husband. She wondered what this crew would think if they knew how much Aidan worried about them....how he considered them his family....his responsibility. He would never let down his guard and display such emotions publicly but here....with her....he was free to express his concerns. "I propose we focus on each other tonight," she finally said. "Let's finish your delicious chili and enjoy the rest of the evening together." He smiles and leans over to kiss her on the cheek. Softly he murmurs, "I would like that idea very much." He returns his attention to his supper, feeling better then he did a few minutes ago, thanks to Deb. She saw him relax as he started stirring his chili. She again turned her attention to the bowl in front of her."If he was upset about Kat," she thought to herself. "What would he think about Anna and her bracelet." She quickly decided that was a conversation for another day....perhaps a day in the very distant future. After all, things always worked out better with a contented husband.

The CMO hovered over her long time friend who was stretched out on the floor, one arm draped over her eyes. "Kat," whispered Debbie. "You heard what the Commander said. We're no longer searching for the changling. Our one and only priority is to get off this planet." She waited for a response from the security officer but received only a determined glare. "It's a direct order, Kat," continued the CMO. "Everyone is watching to see if you can follow a direct order. Your career depends on it." The occupants huddled in the cave had grown totally silent. They had all gathered around to hear Commander Ridire's update on the situation which included a rudimentary escape plan. Needless to say, most of them heard Deb's remarks to Kat Schawnsee. There was no doubt Aidan heard them because he followed them up with one of his own demanding that Kat acknowledge the order. She finally did so but reluctantly and with great obstinance claiming she would only cease her final quest for the changling if Captain McQueen ordered her to do so. At the moment, Kat had no choice but to do as she was told. The lingering effects of the anesthetic Deb had given her had left her weak and hung over. She was in no condition to stand up much less continue hunting for the elusive changling. But that didn't lessen Deb's concern and from the look Aidan gave her after Kat's defiant display, he wasn't convinced either. He'd let her know without speaking a word that Ms. Schawnsee was now Deb's responsibility. The CMO would have to see it that Kat followed orders whether or not she agreed with them. Deb maneuvered into a spot near Kat's head where she could not only keep an eye on her friend but stretch out her injured leg. Merina had taken care of the wound but the leg still ached. And there was no way to replace the blood Deb had lost until they got back to the ship. So, for now, she would have to deal with the lethargy and light headedness. Leaning back against the cave's chilly wall, she closed her eyes and wondered what would happen to the woman lying next to her. It was quite obvious Kat wasn't herself. After all that time at Fleet Medical, she was still very fragile yet they sent her back to the Reaent with permission to self medicate with two hightly potent drugs. "They must have known she wasn't up to this," thought Debbie. "To have such blatant disregard for a patient's well being...." She opened her eyes for a moment and glanced down at Kat. The other woman had returned to her previous position with one arm draped over her eyes. But her breathing was more rapid now, an indication she was agitated. Deb reached for her tricorder and briefly scanned the woman. Her blood pressure was slightly elevated but it was nothing to worry about. Once they were back on the Reaent, she would give Kat a thorough physical. Then she would have to decide what would happen next. It was quite possible Commander Ridire would insist on Kat returning to Fleet Medical. Her behavior during this mission had been less than stellar. Also, she had lied about having her medical records with her when she returned to the ship. Deb had been obligated to share that information with Aidan. He'd taken it as badly as she'd expected. They hadn't had time to discuss it but she had a strong feeling he would want Kat off the ship. Deb, on the other hand, had no intention of returning Schawnsee to those idiots at Fleet who obviously couldn't care less about her. The CMO sighed deeply. The thought of an all out battle with Aidan over Kat Schawnsee made her stomach churn. She looked forward to it about as much as she looked forward to going up against that monster wandering around outside. But it had to be done. Deb was sure Schawnsee had a future in Starfleet....a future on Reaent. The CMO was determined to give her friend the opportunity to become whole once more. Kat wasn't some disposable commodity. She had been a fine officer and could be once again. There were only two questions that remained unanswered. The first....would Kat be willing to cooperate and the second...would they ever make it back to Reaent so Deb could try to help her friend.

By: Commander Ridire & Dr. Matthews If there had been time, the CMO would have stormed into the Captain's office and demanded to know if he'd lost his ever loving mind. It was his right to authorize another away team to visit the planet. But whatever possessed him to allow Schawnsee to go along. She already knew the answer. She'd discussed her concerns to McQueen regarding Kat shortly after the security chief rejoined the ship. He's practically dismissed her apprehension with a wave of his hand. It was obvious to Deb that the Captain wanted Schawnsee on the Reaent....wanted her to be an integral part of this mission. He seemed oblivious to Kat's medical condition. And that was another thing! Just as she was leaving Sickbay, Deb overheard part of the conversation Merina was having with Starfleet Medical regarding Schawnsee's missing medical file. According to them, Kat had possession of her records. Protocol dictated she present those records to the CMO once she arrived on the ship. Schawnsee had not done so. She'd even denied having the file! Debbie groaned quietly as she entered the lift and ordered it to the shuttle bay. Kat was a friend and she was terribly concerned. Not only about Schawnsee's welfare but for that of everyone she came into contact with. The CMO had heard the rumors of Kat's erratic behavior. She'd even witnessed it to a lesser degree when Schawnsee came into Sickbay for her medication. Deb had the uneasy feeling the situation was about to spiral out of control. By the time she returned from this excursion to the planet, a copy of Schawnsee's medical records would be waiting on her desk. Heaven only knew what they contained. One way or the other, she would have to confront her friend about why she withheld the file. And....she would have to mention it to the XO. The thought made her stomach churn. The lift would deposit her down the corridor from the shuttle bay at any moment. Taking a deep breath, she tapped her comm badge and requested Commander Ridire. There was no point delaying the inevitible. She might as well get this part of it over right now. Aidan responded just as the lift door swished open. She stepped out and headed toward the shuttle bay just a few meters away. "I only have a minut," she began, not mincing words. "I'm entering the shuttle bay. The Captain authorized an away team for some type of survey of the planet. Schawnsee said she was ordered to take a medic along so I decided to accompany her. Just before I left Sickbay, I found out she's had her medical records all along. For one reason or another, she hasn't supplied them to us. A copy is on it's way but I thought you should know." For roughly ten seconds there is dead silence on Aidan's end of the conversation as he wrestles with the urge to try and convince her to turn the away team duty over to someone else from medical. That she didn't need to go on every away mission...that she didn't need to risk herself like that. Because of his latent anger at Will and Tabor's stunt, it takes a bit more effort and a bit more time for him to shut that urge out...to remember that he had married a Starfleet Officer and that such things were not only part of her job but that it was also part of his job. That, however, doesn't stop Aidan from once again wishing that they would retire soon and get away from such things as him having to let his wife walk into harm's way. In that ten seconds Aidan steps over to the Observation Lounge. This he wanted some privacy on. He sighs and shakes his head slightly in resignation. "You be extra careful down there, love. Do not put yourself at risk and stick with Shamor at all times. That's all I ask, okay?" He pauses slightly then adds "And as for Schawnsee, we'll deal with that when you get back." She was a little surprised by his response, especially after giving him such a hard time earlier in the day. She was also quite pleased. She knew if the shoe was on the other foot, she would have reacted the same way. They may have disagreed but they still loved one another and were concerned about each others well being. "I'll stick to Jon like glue," she replied quietly as a tinge of guilt about her earlier behavior settled over her. She was going to say something about him talking to the Captain regarding Schawnsee but decided not to. "Don't worry," she finally added. "I'll see you shortly." "I'm going to hold you to that." He pauses slightly then says quietly, not wanting anyone near her on the other end of the line to hear the next words. "And when this mission is over I'm keeping you in my arms for a couple days...whether the outside world wants you for something or not." Right now, she'd like nothing more than a couple of days of isolation with her husband. If only that was possible she mused silently. "Sounds like a plan," she said softly. "And I'll hold you to that." "Then stay safe and I'll see you when you get back." He pauses slightly and a little dry bemusement finds it's way into his voice. "And of course I'll worry. Don't tell me you wouldn't do the same. I'd very much like my better half to be safe and sound tonight." "Count on it," whispered Deb as she approached the other memebers of the away assembled by the shuttle. "As I said, see you shortly." With that, she closed the comm channel and joined the away team all the while trying to curb her annoyance and focus on the task at hand. When the comm channel closes, Aidan sighs and shakes his head in resignation. After a few seconds of letting the day's frustrations rush through him he returns to his chair on the bridge and quietly resumes monitoring the bridge

For Deb, the entire scenario was very peculiar. But she wasn't about to admit that to Kat Schawnsee. The former Security Chief had suddenly reappeared without any prior notice. Then again, that wasn't exactly accurate. The Captain seemed to have known although nobody else had a clue. Considering the circumstances surrounding Kat's departure from the Reaent that was....peculiar. It would seem Kat was the "expert" the CO had mentioned earlier in the day during the senior staff briefing. There were a lot of things Deb didn't know about Schawnsee, apparently more than she ever realized. Still, this particular "expert" was on two major medications. That alone was enough to cause concern. Add to it the secrecy surrounding Kat's arrival and you had the perfect recipe for a major headache. A couple of knowing glances between the CMO and Dr. Curtis led Deb to believe Caroline shared her apprehension. The three physicians and Kat continued their casual chat until TKar arrived to escort their guest to the VIP quarters. As soon as they cleared the Sickbay doors, Deb turned to Caro. "I had no idea she was coming, no idea at all." "Neither did I," Caroline said grimly, the relaxed air which she had kept up while Kat had been in the room dropping away. "And to be honest I'm very surprised that Starfleet Medical would provide no notice to her attending physician or psychiatrist -- not to mention the records of her recent treatment -- given the reasons for which she left initially. Those are not walk-in-the-park pills." She crossed back to the medical cart which held the two bottles -- Noropholopholine and Trilinate. "Not something I'd personally have given a patient the option of self-medication with. I may have to have words with Kevin Macready," she said dryly, referencing the Earth-based psychologist who had attended Kat during her leave. "Though I have no idea if any of this was his idea." Deb's thoughts tumbled about in her head like a pair of dice tossed on craps table. She was hard pressed to focus on a single issue because there were so many to worry about. "I can't believe Macready would have authorized this," she replied, planting her hands on her hips. "If he'd known about it, he'd have made sure to notify us." She paused and looked directly at Caro, her expression a mixture of disbelief and concern. "But the Captain knew! Kat's the changeling expert he was talking about. Why didn't he give us advance notice?" She didn't bother voicing the next question which dealt with whether or not Aidan had known. She suspected he did but that was a subject for a latter discussion. "We need to speak to McQueen and find out exactly how deeply involved Schawnsee is going to be. You were right on about those drugs. They're definitely major league. An changeling expert on Noropholopholine and Trilinate......good heavens....this could be a disaster." "It won't be," Caroline said, almost automatically soothing, though her expression clearly showed she too was also working through the potential ramifications at work here for their particular jobs. "We're paying attention now, at least, and no matter what we'll be able to ensure that her condition, whatever it may be, is dealt with properly. I would like to hear the Captain's explanation for the level of secrecy, however, and I would like those medical records as soon as possible -- do inform me if they arrive." She folded her arms, glancing over her shoulder towards the door of sickbay pensively. "Gives new meaning to the old saw about Medical being the last to know, doesn't it?" she said, shaking her head slightly. "Yeah, chuckled Debbie. "But there's another old saying....the squeaky wheel gets the oil. The Captain and his XO are going to hear a lot of squeaking about this." She reached out and lightly tapped Caro on the shoulder. "You'll be the first to know when the medical records arrive. But we're so far out that might not happen for awhile. In the meantime, you'll have to excuse me." She grinned at the Counselor as she turned toward the main Sickbay doors. "It's time for the squeaking to beginLo."

Deb was relieved to finally get home. She was still second guessing her decision to allow Anna O'Halloran to keep the strange bracelet now securely attached to the scientist's arm. She understood Anna's desire to investigate the intricate piece of jewelry. But she was a little concerned that this particular bracelet was a bit more than....jewelry. On her way to her quarters, Deb kept reminding herself that the Chief Science Officer was still in good health. Her complaint was relative minor. Chances were, Anna would report in tomorrow that the medication worked perfectly. She had wonderful night's sleep and felt just fine. If the results were anything less than that there were still alternatives that didn't include forcibly removing the bracelet. So why was she so concerned about Anna's apparently mundane complaint? It was that darn bracelet! There was something magnetizing about it. Deb felt it and she wasn't even wearing it! As she stepped into her quarters, she made a mental note to contact Anna first thing in the morning. The drug should have worked. If it hadn't, Deb would totally reevaluate the case. As much as she wanted to grant Anna the opportunity to investigate the origin of the bracelet, she couldn't allow that thing to put at risk one of the ship's most valuable crew members. Debbie entered her quarters and forced all thoughts of Anna and her bracelet into the deep recesses of her consciousness. She was looking forward to a quiet evening with Aidan before the start of their next mission. The briefing was in the morning. After that, who knew when there would be time for a "quiet evening." Her husband was already there. Sitting at the desk on the other side of the room, his back to her, pouring over documents of one kind or another. Deb wasn't surprised. She was sure Aidan was preparing for the upcoming mission. She walked over to him and draped her arm of his shoulder. Leaning down, she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. He chose that moment to look up at her. The expression in his eyes caused her to go quiet. There was no doubt something was terribly wrong.

Wade stepped out of the shuttle tentatively, coming out onto the shuttle pad. The routine security detachment had been deployed, standing in front of a retinue from sickbay. He nearly knelt down and kissed the flight deck, happy as he was to be back on the Reaent. The experiences of the past few hours had been trying to say the least. When he had been transported off of the Ithica, he had found himself on the shuttle, yet it could be said that he had arrived on an entirely different shuttle than the other members of the away team. To him everything had appeared to be moving much slower than it should. The conversation from the others on the shuttle was slow and low pitched, as if it had been recorded and then replayed in slow motion. Interacting with the objects around him had proven difficult, and he had feared that if he had gone anymore out of phase with the shuttle that he’d end up floating in space. Some careful tinkering with his arm band had finally allowed him to communicate with the away team, and interact with his environment, albeit with some difficulty. Once Wim had gotten the message, however, he felt confident enough to take his ease while the others worked to retrieve him. He owed a great debt of gratitude to those who had accompanied him on the mission, though he never had a doubt in his mind that they would bring him back to where he belonged. The medical team arrived a few minutes before the shuttle finally settled on the pad. There were ten of them, two for each member of the away team and two more for good measure. Debbie anxiously peered through the observation window as the shuttle bay doors slowly closed and the massive hanger pressurized. “Holy cow!” muttered someone behind her. “Look at that thing.” The CMO made no comment. Her thoughts raced as she scrutinized the belegured craft now safely ensconced inside the shuttle bay. It looked like a relic from another century. One could only hope the living beings inside fared better than the shuttle. Pressurization completed, the bay’s portals automatically unlocked. The medical teams tore themselves away from the windows and rushed inside. The away team began their exit from the small craft just as the medical teams approached. Everyone breathed a quiet sigh of relief. The four members of the away team didn’t appear to have aged all that much, if at all. Apparently, the arm bands functioned properly. Deb gave them all a rudimentary inspection as she approached. Her gaze settled on Lieutenant Wade Knight. The man was a little shaky and his complexion had an unusual greenish tinge. Her assistant followed her as she walked toward him. “Welcome back, Mr. Knight,” she said calmly as she stepped up to him. “You look a bit pale,” she continued opening her tricorder for a cursory scan. “What happened over there?” “Well, the short story is we got the Ithica’s computer core and got the heck out of there,” Wade explained with a shaky grin. He still wasn’t sure how much time had passed for the others while he had been trapped in his state of temporal phase. For him he had spent days on the shuttle, watching the others move at a snails pace while he attempted to repair his arm band. “I’m quite alright doctor, I’m just a few days older than I was.” Debbie listened intently, glancing between Wade and her tricorder. His vitals appeared normal but he was obviously stressed....and there was something else. She wasn’t sure exactly what. The tricorder hinted at a change in metabolic rate and there were definitely anomalous readings from the Lieutenant’s cerebellum. She’d known that might occur but it was still disturbing to actually see it. They would determine the full extent of his injuries once they got him back to Sickbay. The CMO glanced around at the other members of the away team. They were all undergoing similar exams. She took an extra few seconds to compare their physical appearances to Mr. Knight’s. Of them all, he seemed to have suffered the worst. “Looks like the other fared a little better than you did,” remarked Debbie. “They don’t appear as green as you are. Be honest with me, did something unforeseen happen to you?” Wade’s smirk turned to a frown as he watched Deb work. It was apparent that she was concerned about something. He hadn’t had much interaction with the good doctor up to now, but she hadn’t seemed to him to be the sort of person to interact. Wade nodded slowly, “Aye. I was trapped in the time bubble for an hour or so, in your time. From my perspective I spent thirteen days and five hours trapped.” His statement took her aback. Debbie stared at him for a long moment as his words filtered through her brain. “Get a gurney,” she said flatly to Gracie, her assistant. She was still fixed on Wade Knight as the nurse hurried away. “How did that happen?” she asked in the same flat tone she’d just used on Gracie. The chief nurse reappeared before Wade had a chance to answer. “Hop on,” invited Gracie while adjusting the height of the gurney. Lieutenant Knight opened his mouth to speak but the CMO beat him to it. “That’s not a request,” she stated gently nudging the engineer toward the gurney. “I know you think you can walk out of here but I insist you ride instead.” He must have realized it was resistance was futile or was too weak to try to argue. Wade Knight grudgingly laid down on the awaiting gurney. Gracie secured the restraints just enough to keep the patient from falling off during the short trip to Sickbay. Debbie glanced about one more time to insure the other members of the away team were being cared for. Satisfied that everything was under control, she silently followed the gurney out of the shuttle bay, her thoughts now totally focused on Mr. Knight....his symptoms and what, if anything, could be done to counteract them.

"Have you lost your mind?" She was alone in the turbolift....nobody else was there to respond to her question and that was just fine. She already knew the answer. Debbie had a legitimate concern for the welfare of the away team. That's why she'd gone to the bridge in the first place....to find out what was going on aboard the Ithaca. She hadn't heard anything about how the away team was doing and didn't want to be taken by surprise if an emergency was immanent. As it turned out, the bridge hadn't heard much from the AT either. She might as well have stayed in Sickbay. That was especially true after she opened her mouth and stuck her foot in it. Deb had serious reservations about sending an away team to the Ithaca. What was the point? They knew for a fact the crew was long gone. She could understand the powers that be wanting to know what happened to them but at what cost? Another fact....the Ithaca's crew had aged at least twenty-five years. Even if they were located, what could be done? Yanking them back from the future would most likely cause serious physical damage...primarily to their brains. And even if it was possible, would they want to return? They might be better off remaining where they were....wherever that was. She doubted a team would have been sent to the Ithaca if it hadn't been for those arm bands. She had to admit they were a brilliant innovation. They were also relatively untested. If they failed while the away team was inside that bubble.....the thought sent shivers down her spine. It was risky....very risky and Deb was having a difficult time justifying the risk. If the away team succeeded, they would return with Ithaca's ship's log. They might provide insight into the nature of this anomaly. They might indicate how the crew left and where they were planning to go...all very important information. But what if they failed? Deb wasn't usually so pessimistic. Nor was she so cautious. She cross examined herself several times on why the sudden hesitancy to embrace the obvious risk of this particular mission. After all, they were in the business of taking risks....that's what they did....what they were expected to do.....what she'd been doing for years. So why was she so bothered about all of this? These were private thought....private concerns until a few minutes ago when she unwittingly voiced them aloud to, of all people, the counselor! "What were you thinking?" she muttered again, leaning against the rear wall of the lift. She wasn't thinking....that was the problem. If she'd been thinking, she wouldn't have dropped her guard. She would have maintained her professional demeanor, gathered the information she needed and kept her mouth shut. But the words were out and there was no taking them back. Curtis had picked up on it so now, Deb could only hope she'd covered up her gaff sufficiently. She would know soon enough. The lift arrived at her deck and the door swished opened to an empty corridor. Deb stepped out and slowly made her way back to Sickbay. She would stay off the bridge until they'd completed this mission. But that wouldn't stop her from wondering.....why had she become so cautious? So reluctant to accept risks that a short time ago were perfectly acceptable. The answer prowled about her thoughts, demanding recognition. But she wasn't ready to acknowledge it...much less accept it.

Happy Birthday Admiral! Stop by your local Sickbay today and you'll get a free face lift. It only takes a few minutes and will make you fell sooooo much better. :D

It wasn't unexpected but it still amazed her. It always did and she supposed it always would. Aidan Ridire's emerald green eyes were one of his most distinguishing characteristics...that and his gorgeous red hair. But today, it was those eyes that caught her attention. There was no way to avoid them. Where Debbie was concerned, her husband's eyes reflected his feelings for her....warm, loving and inviting. Not that she hadn't seen them reflect other, more negative, emotions. But rarely were those directed at her. This, however, was one of those rare occasions. The XO had assembled an away team to board a damaged ship somewhere in the Benecia system. Deb didn't know all the details. In truth, she was certain of only three things. First of all, the crew complement of the ship in distress was approximately 25 souls. But she had no idea what type of ship it was much less its name. Secondly, their problem might have something to do with triceron explosives the ship was carrying. How exactly the triceron was involved remained a mystery. And thirdly, Aidan Ridire did not expect the representative from the medical department requested to accompany his away team to be none other than the CMO herself.....and he wasn't happy about it. Somehow, Deb had managed to arrive in the transporter room before anyone else on the away team. She wasn't there long when Aidan came in with Anna, TKar and Murray. "De....Dr. Matthews....what are you doing here?" The words weren't out of his mouth before he figured it out and those beautiful emerald eyes of his turned from warm and loving to stunned and then angry....no....not angry....concerned.....yes, definitely concerned and very, very unhappy. He frowns, knowing they didn't have much time for this particular conversation. For the three years they had been married, Aidan had managed to not let his innate desire to protect her interfere with letting her do her job. Of course most of the situations that were dangerous were dangerous after he had let her do her job. This situation is entirely different. It was known to be dangerous from the start. Ignoring the others for now he steps towards Deb and gently guides her off to the side. Keeping his voice low he murmurs "Deb, we are about to beam over to a freighter that has a very unstable engine core and its carrying triceron explosives that were going to be disposed of by the technicians on Starbase Two. The explosives themselves might be unstable as well. This situation is highly dangerous and I don't want you...." Even as he says the words he knows he’s not likely to get anywhere in this conversation. The rational part of him is telling him he can hardly tell her that its too dangerous for her but expect her to let him do his job as well. Of course, when it comes to love and marriage, rationality didn't always play a part. This wasn't a surprise either. She fully expected Aidan's little lecture. And she was pretty sure he knew how she would respond. On the way to the transporter room, Deb had pondered how she would deal with it. She didn't make her final decision on that until after he started talking about unstable engine cores and triceron explosives that might be just as unstable. She chose to take the high road. Holding up a hand to stop him, she smiled warmly at her husband. "I appreciate your concern," she said quietly. "I take great comfort in the fact you love me as much as you do. But you don't have a leg to stand on here and you know it." She nodded slightly at the other members of the away team, huddled together discreetly trying to ignore their commanding officer and his wife. "The situation isn't too dangerous for them," she continued keeping her voice low. "Or for you." She shrugged slightly. "So why don't we get this over with. If we're lucky, we might make it back in time for a late night dinner." Aidan spends a good twenty seconds or so trying to come up with an argument that she would agree with and choose to stay on Reaent, safe and sound. And as quickly as he comes up with them he also comes up with what she is likely to say in response. Finally he closes his eyes, sighs to himself, and shakes his head briefly. He knows she is right, as much as he wishes she wasn't so he could order her to remain on the ship, safe and sound. Opening his eyes he focuses on her and finally murmurs "Very well, Doctor, as you wish. But you are not to do anything reckless." His voice drops to a whisper and a fleeting smirk appears on his lips. "And after dinner you and I are going to have a....talk about the part in the wedding ceremony that mentions "wives, love and obey your husbands," your failure to abide by that and exactly how you're going to make it up to me for doing so and making me worry." "Obey?" she questioned with a whimsical grin. "I don't remember anything in our vows about obeying a husband. And I'm never reckless either." She took a small step toward the rest of the away team pausing just long enough to wink at Aidan. "Now come on, let's do this and then we'll discuss who is going to make up for what." He whispers "It was right there next to 'a husbands should love and protect his wife'. And as for who owes what to who...that's still going to be you owing me. But feel free to try and convince me otherwise later." He smirks as he says the last. He steps past her and onto the transporter dais. When everyone is assembled and has made sure they all have the appropriate equipment, he turns his attention to the transporter chief and gives the order to energize.

Deb glanced at her watch as she stepped out of the lift. She'd just a new record. It had taken a full ten minutes for her to get to the bridge. She shrugged off the thought. After all, there was no emergency. This wasn't even an official visit. She'd been bored silly in Sickbay and came up here for a little break....and to confront a thief. Whenever she visited the bridge, the mood was habitually tense. Of course, the ship was usually in some kind of trouble varying from mild to extreme. Not this time. The crew was amazingly relaxed. And why not. There was absolutely nothing going on in this section of the galaxy. This mundane assignment offered a perfect opportunity to unwind a little. She nonchalantly strolled toward the command center of the bridge. The Captain was absent but the XO was in his chair studying a report of some kind....or at least he was pretending to study it. He'd turned around and glanced at her when she first got off the lift and didn't seem at all surprised to see her. She casually wondered why. "Guess who I caught in the lift?" whispered Deb as she came to a stop beside him. He arches an eyebrow in some confusion then it dawns on him what she’s asking. He glances up at her and whispers "A certain department chief and pilot?" Not wanting this to become bridge fodder, Aidan stands and guides Deb towards the observation lounge. Privately Aidan is glad for the distraction. Except for lunch, he had been stuck reading through reports all day and dealing with various other paperwork. And granted he is a fast reader...but reading that much routine and rather boring stuff had started to give him a headache. He had long ago privately decided that the main reason that the Executive Officer position existed within Starfleet was so Captain’s had someone to foist all the paperwork onto. The wheels were turning as they headed for the observation lounge. She was a little disappointed Aidan knew who she'd caught in the lift. Then again, she reasoned, something must have happened involving him and the loving duo who'd held up the lift for a good six minutes. Now, she was more curious than ever. "Yep," she affirmed as the lounge door swished to a close. "Didn't catch them in the act or anything but I'm pretty sure they took the lift offline for a few minutes." She smiled knowingly. "And they had guilty looks on their faces." She stepped up to him and slipped her arms around his waist. "So, how did you know who I was talking about?" He settles his arms around her waist and leans in to kiss her on the cheek. Pulling away slightly he says "Because the reason they were in the turbolift together is that I just had them up here, in this room, so I could tend to a certain...request of theirs. Which I'm not entirely sure was a necessarily good thing for me to grant." He catches her momentary look of confusion so he goes on. "They made a request for certain...living arrangements that we didn't get to ourselves until we were married. Well..except for a couple of instances." He pauses and then adds "And lets hope they have the sense to not, as you said, get caught in the act in the turbolift." "They're too smart to let that happen," quipped Deb, standing on her toes to return Aidan's kiss. She gazed into his deep green eyes and frowned slightly. "Poor love, I really put you through it before we got married. I hope I've made it up to you since we took our vows." He smiles, "I have what I wanted, that’s all that matters." His smile softens, "And it was important that things progress how they did for you, I didn't want you getting scared off. So you have nothing to "make up to me" and you know that." He leans back against the edge of the table. "All I want out of life is to be in your arms. I'm a simple man that way and am easy to please, I guess." He shrugs as he says the last. Deb leaned against the table beside Aidan. "A simple man?" she asked, a mischievous grin pulling on her lips. "Easy to please? Tell me, would you consider something as inconsequential as a lollipop one of those simple pleasures?" He smiles wryly, "I doubt my wife thinks that a lollipop is inconsequential. Sometimes I think my wife loves her sweets more then she does me. At any rate, I was planning a quiet supper in the holodeck with my wife tonight and a long walk along the moonlit beach there. If she thinks I need to make it up for..eating one of her lollipops I trust that suffices?" "I'll take that as an admission of guilt," replied Deb easily. "Those Tootsie Pops are hard to come by. You must have known I was hot on your trail. That's why you came up with the idea of a quiet supper in the holodeck....on the beach no less." She pushed away from the table and stood in front of him. "I suppose that will make up for your thievery," she added with a grin. She reached up and patted his cheek lightly. "But I've moved my stash and nothing you do will make me tell you where the new hiding place is." He smirks and rolls his eyes. "I already had the idea before I took the tootsie pop, yeesh. And its not like I couldn't take a tricorder and search for them." He slips his arms around her waist and draws her closer as he purrs "Besides, I think I can claim partial ownership. What is yours is mine and vice versa and all. Or should I hide the chocolate peanut butter cookies next time my mom sends some? Or those chocolate mints she sent me as a birthday present last time?" "It doesn't matter where you hide those goodies," laughed Deb. "I'll find them.....and I won't need a tricorder either." She tapped the end of her nose. "I can smell chocolate a light year away." She leaned against him, resting her head on his chest. "And I hope you find my new hiding place. If you stop raiding the lollipop box, I won't have an excuse to come up here and bother you." "Hmm..if this is you bothering me I could do with a lot more bothering then. And since your hiding spot has to be in your office, that should make it relatively easy to find. After all, I don't think you're going to trust your fellow doctors, nurses and orderlies in Sickbay by hiding them there." He tightens his arms around her, enjoying the feel and warmth of her against him. Softly he murmurs "Would give anything to remain here like this...but I guess..." His voice trails off as an earlier idea comes back to him, one that should let them extend this moment a while longer. "Speaking of such things and assuming we do get leave this Christmas, I think at least part of the time should be spent in Hawaii. It is our anniversary as well and I'd just as soon not have family around then. Besides, it would let us begin shopping for a certain idea we have for the future." "Sounds like a great idea," murmured Debbie, not bothering to move. She was far too comfortable where she was. But all good things come to an end. She knew they couldn't stay in the lounge much longer or the bridge crew would think they'd caught the XO and CMO in the act. "Let's hope we get the leave," she added, pulling away from him. They slowly walked toward the door, hand in hand. "What time is dinner?" "I'm pretty sure we'll get that leave. At least I hope so. And dinner will be at 7:00. Will give us time to get home and change out of these uniforms. If I may suggest, one of your light summer dresses would be...pleasing." He smiles and squeezes her hand gently. "I intend to do my very best to forget that I'm on a starship. Just want to concentrate on having a quiet and romantic night with my wife. And there will be a chaise lounge on the beach in case she gets tired of walking along the beach after supper." "Can't have a romantic evening on the beach without the chaise," purred Deb as they reached the observation lounge door. Beyond was the bridge and Sickbay and all the responsibilities those places implied. But for the last several minutes, she'd been temporarily transported to another frame of mind....one far more pleasant than shipboard duties allowed. And now she had the evening to look forward to as well. Stopping just far enough away from the door to keep it from opening, Deb paused and smiled at her husband. "If Anna and Will get along half as well as we do, then I dare say they have a bright future together." He shrugs and smiles faintly. "Perhaps that will turn out to be the case. But to be honest, I'm not so interested in their future. I'm much more interested in ours." He leans in for a gentle kiss. Breaking it off after a few seconds he purrs "Speaking of, I'd like to collect more on this later tonight." "You can count on it," whispered Deb. The doors swished open and they strolled onto the bridge doing their best not to look anything more than professional. It was a testament to the crew that nobody stared at them although she had no doubt what some were thinking. "See you tonight," murmured Deb as she casually walked to the lift. "And please, don't be late." He nods slightly in reply to her as his eyes follow her until she disappears into the turbolift. Sighing quietly to himself he turns towards his chair, his mind focusing on his duties. There would be time enough to focus on more pleasant things later tonight, right now it was best to get the job done and out of the way. Though, Aidan doubts anyone would blame him if his mind wandered a bit from time to time to briefly focus on tonight. "All bridge stations report please. Anything of interest seemingly about to happen?" Privately he fervently wishes nothing does. If the rest of his days turned out to be as boring, work wise, as the last few days he would be eternally grateful.

She didn't have to ask him twice about lunch. Aidan immediately accepted her invitation and quickly turned the bridge over to 1st Lt. O’Halloran A moment later, Deb and her husband were safely ensconced in the privacy of the turbolift. She ordered it to a remote deck where there were a couple of small, seldom used mess halls. Leaning against one side of the car, she grinned at the handsome Irishman standing across from her. "So," she started, her tone anything but serious. "Who are you? And what have you done with our old XO?" He arches an eyebrow and smiles faintly. "I’m not sure what you mean. All I was saying was that I could field promote Mr. Lexi to my position and then I would retire. If that marks any change in me, perhaps its reflective of certain...desires I have regarding the future." "I've never known you to express....private opinions in public," she replied coyly. "I thought this change might have been due to age or experience. But I'm not too sure about that." She pushed herself away from the wall and took a couple of steps toward him. "Another thing......what's all this talk about....pleasure planets?" She'd been so engrossed in teasing her spouse, Deb didn't notice the lift had glided to a stop. The doors quietly swished open to reveal three junior officers standing in the corridor. They clearly heard her questioning her husband about his sudden interest in "pleasure planets." Aidan manages to quash enough of his embarrassment at the sudden arrival of witnesses to Deb’s teasing long enough to glare the junior officers into silence. Though he’s sure it will be a topic of conversation for them later, knowing the way junior officers loved to gossip about their superiors. He slips an arm through Deb’s and guides her out of the turbolift and down the corridor. Once they're out of earshot, he relaxes and chuckles softly. Softly he murmurs to her "Well...at least they didn't catch us kissing, I suppose." He stops in mid stride after that as it occurs to him that he doesn't know where she was intending to go for lunch. "Did you see the looks on their faces, " laughed Deb. "They probably think we're too old for pleasure planets." She stood beside him in the corridor for a moment then took his hand in hers. "Come on," she continued, nodding toward a room several doors down. "There's a small mess on this deck. Not many people use it. I thought we might find a little more privacy there." As she stared down the hall, she glanced at her husband and grinned. "At least I hope we'll have a little privacy. I want to know why you're suddenly dreaming about pleasure planets." He lets her lead him to the mess hall which they find empty. As the door closes behind them he kisses her on the cheek and murmurs "Too old? I think my wife is forgetting that she is a young thirty year old and that I’m not too much older. And are you forgetting Gedi Prime or Risa, love? As for my interest in such planets, I’m sure you can figure out why. Since your presence would be rather required." He smirks "Not like I was intending it to be a solo idea, its much more..pleasant with the right company." "I remember," replied Deb, her voice muted. She would never forget their honeymoon on Gedi Prime or their leave on Risa....but especially their stay on Gedi Prime. It was a wonderful few weeks and very.....educational. "I also assumed you weren't planning to go alone. Can't have much fun by yourself on a pleasure planet." She stood in front of one of the replicators and took a moment to review the menu before ordering a small chef's salad. Once it appeared in front of her, she again focused on Aidan who was still deciding what he wanted. "So," she quipped, stepping past him on her way to one of the three tables in the small room. "Can't find enough pleasure aboard ship to suit you?" He covers a cough at what she says. As he figures out how to respond he orders a hamburger and salad along with a glass of water. He follows her to the table and sits down. Coyly he replies, "It’s more like here there are distractions from its pursuit." He takes a bite from his hamburger and swallows. "You know..the pleasure of sleeping in late, sharing a meal with someone, taking that person dancing. Things along those lines and some others perhaps. One has to be a bit too mindful of time here." He arches an eyebrow and then asks mischievously "And have you heard me register any complaints regarding what you just asked?" Debbie couldn't resist smiling. "No," she retorted. "You haven't complained, at least, not to me. And I seriously doubt you would voice such complaints to anyone else." She paused long enough to take a bite of her salad and swallow it. "And don't worry," she continued, jabbing her fork in Aidan's direction. "I have no complaints either. It just seems out of character for you to make such casual remarks in a public forum." Deb grinned mischievously. "As I said before, what's happened to our old XO?" He smiles "I was assuming you had no complaints. As for anything I did being out of character, perhaps it’s a certain lady’s influence on me. But if she wishes I can go back to how I used to be?" He shrugs and adds teasingly "But speaking for myself, I’d much prefer not. Your..influence has been much more entertaining." He reaches across and picks a slice of carrot from her salad and eats it." She quickly swallowed another bite of the salad and again poked her fork at her husband. "Entertaining?" she sputtered in mock dismay. "Is that what you think? I'm entertaining......like putting on a show?" She withdrew the fork and stabbed at her salad with it. "Okay, I'll accept that," she added with a grin. "It would seem you rather enjoy my performances so I'll consider that a compliment." He smiles "I’m thinking that I wasn’t the only one acting a bit out of character. You’re being awfully coy and flirtatious." His smile broadens "Not that I’m complaining mind you but probably a good thing that we’re alone in here." "That's why we're here," quipped Debbie, finishing off her salad. She had barely closed her mouth around the fork when the distinctive swishing sound of the door echoed through the small mess. Four junior officers, all engineers, breezed into the room, talking and laughing about some silly incident they had all recently witnessed. It took a moment for them to realize they weren't alone. Deb was facing the door and had a clear view of their stunned expressions when they finally noticed the room was already occupied. The chatter and giggling stopped instantly as they huddled together wondering what to do next. It was clear they would have preferred to bolt out the door but were concerned how that might look to the XO and CMO. Taking pity on them, Deb swallowed her salad and pushed back her chair. Standing, she smiled at the hapless ensigns and waved them into the room. "Relax ladies and gentlemen," she announced. "The Commander and I were just leaving." Aidan got up from the table as Deb walked toward the recycle unit. She waited for him after dropping her plate and utensils into it. "So much for privacy," she whispered with a chuckle and headed toward the door. After they enter the hall he reaches for her hand and squeezes it gently. He smiles wryly "Perhaps we should see about some privacy later? Someplace where we won’t be having junior officers walking in and interrupting?" Debbie smiled mischievously. "Oh," she whispered, leaning closer to him as they approached the lift. "I know just the place!" He smiles wryly. "Oh? You'll have to tell me about it sometime." He follows her into the turbolift and as the door closes. He purrs "But I think I did mention something about a kiss before. I think I'll take that now." He leans down and kisses her warmly for a few seconds.

This evening is progressing quite nicely, thought Debbie as her head came to rest on the soft, down pillow. She slipped her hands under head and grinned at the bedroom ceiling. She had managed to get home on time and was greeted by her husband's carefully prepared dinner....lobster tail, baked potato and green beans. Their meal was topped off with a hefty slice of that decadent chocolate cake Aidan had purchased at that sinful bakery on Starbase 2. Yes, thought Deb giddily, this evening is progressing perfectly....and the day didn't go too badly either. She and Merina and two or three others had spent most of their on duty hours working on "The Requisition." They'd started with a detailed survey of the physical therapy facility located next door to Sickbay. It was much larger and more spacious than Deb remembered. In no time at all, the "spa team" had come up with a plan to rearrange the equipment in order to accommodate all three of the proposed spa tubs the CMO wanted to install. They'd put their plans on a padd and treked down to engineering to see if the power supplies in the rehab facility could be moved without too much inconvenience. As fate would have it, the maintenance engineers saw no problems with the proposed plan. A couple of them even offered suggestions on how to tuck the tubs away for more privacy. Their ideas were excellent and quickly added to the original plans. After the leg work was completed, Deb and Merina spent hours carefully wording the requisition making sure to incorporate the all important information regarding "medical necessity." Once the requisition was finished, it was reviewed by the entire "spa team." All of the necessary changes were made and finally, just a few minutes before the shift ended, Debbie forwarded it to her immediate superior. He'd been amenable when she first mentioned it yesterday. Hopefully, he would put his stamp of approval on it and that would be that. Her grin broadened as she thought about the timing. It was perfect! She glanced to her right as her immediate superior entered the bedroom, a large towel wrapped around his waist. How convenient that he was also her husband, whom she adored. He smiled warmly as he proceeded to dress for bed. Deb returned the smile. Again, the timing was perfect. She would give him a few minutes to settle in and then remind him about the requisition. After that, she would focus all of her attention on him. The requisition was already waiting for him. He would read it in the morning. But for tonight, she was determined to do all she could to help sway his opinion.....and guarantee his approval of Spa Reaent.

Speaking of transporters, one of the best logs I've EVER read on the subject was recently posted to the Sky Harbor Aegis boards. I strongly recommend reading it. "If I'm Dead, Will You Send Me a Postcard?" Lt. Cdr. Scott Coleridge

Congratulations Aegis!!! Although I hear the station may be in for it's fourth reincarnation. ;) Still, fifteen years is a long time in the wonderful world of simming. Well done to all of those who have kept the fires burning on Aegis...and I mean that literally. :)

A brief glimpse into the dreams of the Reaent's XO also known as Deb's loving husband - by the Reaent's XO and his wife! As Aidan settles into his seat on the bridge his mind runs over the conversation earlier with Deb in their quarters. For whatever reason, his mind focuses on trying to figure out what exactly she meant by "I think maybe I'll be ready a little before two years" in regards to leaving the ship, retiring from Starfleet and moving on to the next stage of their lives and their marriage. If it hadn’t been for the interruption regarding Commander Schawnsee and the reasons behind it, Aidan would take what Deb said as something to feel just joy over. But in context of the apparent problem with Schawnsee and how Deb reacted when the original incident happened, Aidan isn’t sure what she said was meant in a good way. Still, he hopes she meant what she said in a positive way and the memories of her reaction from the incident before aren’t coloring it. In an effort to get his mind off the negative thoughts, he tries forcing it onto a different topic. For whatever reason, his mind imagines stepping through the doors into an entranceway of a spacious house. He sets Deb, who he had been carrying, down on her feet and then pulls her into a kiss. Breaking it off he murmurs "Welcome to our new home." A breeze from the open windows in the large living room beyond the entranceway picks up and brings the smell of a tropical sea to them. "I know you did this for me," she breathed in his ear as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "We could have taken that place a few kilometers from your parent's home." And that was true. The house in Ireland had been quite lovely....very spacious and the gardens were beautiful. Debbie had no problem living there but, she had to admit, this particular home on the Hawaiian beachfront was her favorite. Aidan had given up settling near his family so her dream of living on the beach could come true. The house was so much larger than anything she was accustomed to. She had lived aboard starships for so long, she'd lost touch with the space and amenities afforded one by a real house. As it was, they had very little to move in with....not even furniture....although the bedroom suite would be arriving later in the day. There was so much to do to turn this house into their home. She was really looking forward to all the shopping and even though Aidan groaned every time she mentioned it, she knew, deep down, he was almost as excited as she was....and he had yet to find out about her little secret. He smiles as he slips his arms around her. "What’s the point of being married if the husband can’t see to his wife’s wishes and wants. Besides, we’re on Earth and not on some starship. And it’s not like with today’s technology it’s that difficult to visit either my parents or your grandparents." He kisses the crux of her neck then trails it to her ear before murmuring, "Besides, all I wanted was to have an actual home in an actual house with you. Somewhere where we can grow old together, live here for the rest of our lives." He guides her into the living room just beyond the entranceway, the main feature of which is a large bay window overlooking a large flower garden and the front lawn. And on the opposite wall is a equally large set of windows overlooking the ocean beyond. He sets her back on her feet and smiles amusedly, "I think this will do for us, yes? Not like it doesn’t have enough space for all the things I’m sure my wife is going to delight in buying, I hope. Unless you intend to go completely overboard?" "Oh I'm sure this will do just fine," replied Deb with a laugh. "If I have my way, we'll live here forever. And rest easy, I will not go overboard. But even you must agree that we need some furniture," she added glancing around the empty room. "We have a kitchen with no pots or pans. We don't even have dishes to eat off of." She grinned at him sheepishly. "Guess we'll have to eat out for a while." He chuckles and nods. "Well, the bedroom furniture won’t arrive til later today. You sure you didn’t want something new for that by the way? At any rate we should probably concentrate on the kitchen, dining room, living room, main bathroom and I guess anything else we might need for our bedroom first. The rest of the rooms can probably wait til after we’ve got those settled. I don’t think we’ll be needing the spare bedrooms or the other rooms settled right away. I don’t see us having guests until we’re more settled in, do you? And I suppose at some point we’ll have to go to my parents and pick up Nephtys from Ciara’s care. But we should check out the rest of the house first I think. We should get a better idea of what we want and what we need before we go shopping." His smile turns mischievous as he thinks something. "And Deb, I didn’t agree to buy this house purely for you. I do get some benefit from it. Like seeing you in light summer clothes and bathing suits. Speaking of which, we should go clothes shopping too. I think some of our clothes are too heavy for a area that will be as warm as this." Debbie was laughing by the time Aidan finished speaking. "Wow!" she chided with amusement. "And you were concerned I would go overboard?" Taking his hand, she lead him toward the spare bedrooms, one of which they have both agreed should be transformed into some kind of an office. It was large enough to accommodate both their needs but that wasn't the room she was most interested in. There were two others. One would be their guest room...a guest room that Aidan wasn't in a big hurry to furnish. The other would be something else entirely. Again, her husband's thoughts were quite logical. Those two rooms wouldn't be needed for awhile. He smirks "I was referring to the rooms we’ll use everyday, the ones we’ll need right away. Yes, its quite a bit more shopping required then I usually like to do but then..well this is a big project, so to speak. I want to make this a complete home quickly and I want to make you happy." In a way, he was right. But she happened to know they would be needed a bit sooner than Aidan realized. "For now," she said lightly. "We probably should focus on the kitchen and the common areas." She stopped in the hall just outside what would become the guest room. " But we can't put off furnishing these two rooms for too long." Aidan looked totally confused but she didn't give him a chance to say anything. "Once this one is occupied," she continued, pointing toward the next room. "I'm sure we'll have company and we will need someplace for them to stay. Dropping his hand, Debbie walked on down the hallway and stepped inside the next room. She stood near the door and surveyed the empty space with it's barren walls and naked windows. She knew her husband was right behind her so she didn't bother turning around. "And we have about 30 weeks before this room will be occupied." He blinks in confusion at what she says. He spends a long minute trying to figure out what she’s referring to. He finally starts to say "Who would be in that room in...." And that's when it starts to dawn on him as to what she’s referring to as he thinks through the time period she mentioned. Thirty weeks? That’s six weeks short of thirty six weeks and that was... He suddenly finds it difficult to breathe as his mind whirls for a few seconds. He settles his hands at her shoulders and slowly turns her around. "Deb, are you saying you’re..." His voice catches again and as if to complete the question he traces a hand down her side and presses it gently against her stomach. "That's what I'm saying," mummers Deb, slipping her arms around his neck. "But don't ask me the gender because I don't know. And I don't want to know." She smiled broadly as she glanced from one side to the other pretending to look at the room. "So we'll have to decorate carefully.....something for either a boy or a girl. We can always add the trimmings once the baby is here." He smiles broadly for a second then gathers her in his arms. He almost asks the questions of how and when but catches himself, deciding that those were incredibly silly questions. He lifts her off her feet as he kisses her deeply. He breaks it off after a minute and murmurs "I love you, Deb. And I don’t want to know the gender either. Much prefer to be surprised." As soon as he says that he kisses her again. And if there's any tears in his eyes, he doesn’t notice them. He breaks off the kiss again. "We should think of someway to celebrate, darling." It went better than she could have possibly hoped for. She knew he would be surprised and was pretty sure he'd be please. The fact he was ecstatic made it all the better. "I love you too," she whispered, resting her cheek against his chest. "I'm glad you're happy about it. I am too." That was an understatement. She was well beyond happy. She'd been walking on clouds for the past month or so. Now, she could share the joy with Aidan, who's cooperation in this little project had been absolutely essential. She pulled back a bit and looked up at him. It was ironic to see the stoic Commander so emotional and misty eyed. But she wouldn't tease him about it. This was a momentous occasion. "I know the bedroom furniture is scheduled for later today," she quipped gleefully. "But maybe we can sneak in a little lunch before it arrives. That would be a celebration for me. I'm famished." "Whatever my wife wishes. But may I also suggest, perhaps, that once we get back and our bedroom furniture is here, you allow me to give you a massage?" He smiles wryly, "Considering my wife is likely to start blaming me for getting her into her...condition in a couple months. I’d like the opportunity to get on her good side as much as possible. And I trust that Merina and Gracie already know?" He brushes a hand against the side of her face. "And may I also suggest that we tell our families in person? Else they’re going to be somewhat miffed that there won’t be hugging and whatnot involved. I think we can afford a day trip or two sometime this week?" Aidan was talking a mile a minute and Debbie couldn't help but laugh. "I will never say no to a good massage," she quipped. "But I promise, I won't blame you when I start looking like the primary hull of a Galaxy class. After all, you aren't totally responsible." Stepping away from him, she took his hand and led him back into the hallway. "And yes, Merina and Gracie and the entire medical staff know. So do several others on the ship. I was scared to death they would slip up and say something to you." He stops and pulls her back into him. Smiling wryly, he quips bemusedly "If we have additional children if you tell others that you’re pregnant before me I will withhold chocolate from you. And massages and other intimate things like that." He punctuates that with a kiss. "You know I can't live without chocolate," grinned Debbie. "So if there is a next time, I'll make sure you're the second one to know. But this is our first.....and I wanted to surprise you." They left the hall and stepped into what would become their family room. "As far as the day trips go, I think that's a great idea." She continued pulling him toward the front door. "Maybe we can make some arrangements while we're eating lunch." He opens the front door for her as he asks "So...you can’t live without chocolate but I also threatened to withhold massages and kisses and those you apparently can live without." He smirks and adds "I’m not sure quite what to think of that." As they step outside he closes the door and makes sure its locked. Falling into step beside her he slips his arm around her waist. "I mean, I’d like to think that those are other things you wouldn’t want to deal without. Would be rather a hope of mine actually." He shakes his head and chuckles. "But I’ll let that go so we can concentrate more on deciding what furniture we need and making arrangements to tell our family about your little surprise." With that the pleasant little daydream ends and Aidan finds himself still on the bridge of a Starship and not where he increasingly wants to be. He glances around before sighing quietly to himself. Idly he wonders if they will ever get to that point.

Debbie was just about to call for Angel when she spotted him walking toward her. She silently chided herself for thinking he would have been anywhere else but in Sickbay, waiting for Kat to finally awaken. She tried to smile reassuringly but was almost certain Angel saw right through her. The expression he wore was of both concern and fear for his wife. She got the impression he was almost as frightened about what was happening as Kat. "Angel moved from the shadows of the room...behind Dr. Matthew's and Dr. Curtis'...this was the first time he had used his own telepathic abilities on an unknowing colleague....the time is desperate though. The time spent with his wife had been both informative....and at the very same time puzzling. The time holding her hand and looking deep into her mind and thoughts as she slept were continuing exhibit a rather strong and almost impenetrate shield around the area he knew so well as his little one. The Doctors though totally unaware ...were in fact unknowing participants of a close mind sharing...and to speak of it now may actually serve to make things worse...after all Angel had to insure his wife had the very, very best of attention. The suggestion took mere moments,The original plan and thoughts of the Doctors were about to be Askewed a bit....all within their prospective limits as they would demand for care of Schawnsee. Along with his presense Angel passed along the suggestion to both Doctors...spaced apart in their own thoughts to possibly send his wife to Terra, to Earth ....to the known centers in Talaqueah....to home to seek the very best care possible....and on the charts of care centers. The centers they were going to discuss with both He and Schawnsee were not of the type needed to help her heal....become herself, wether herself anewed...or of old, Angel could deal with either...he merely wanted the very best care for his little one. Kat looked up to Caroline and then over to Debbie with a bit of worry in her eyes. "I.... I can't move. I want to get out of here. I have to find Arch. I can't stay away from him to long. Let me get to him. I have to be sure he's ok," she says with the same worry in her voice. She again tried to get up to no avail. Caroline smiled reassuringly, leaning against the next biobed over, meeting Kat's worried gaze. It was a familiar one; something had caused the same fears from when Caroline had first come aboard to reassert themselves with a vengeance. Again she wondered if she should have done more at the time, but pushed the thought to the side. "He's just fine, Kat...you just lay there and relax and we'll get him, alright?" She glanced sideways at Deb and then back at the CSEC. "Why don't you tell me how you're feeling?" Kat settled down slightly at Caroline's words but her muscles were still twitching. "I feel all tight inside like my chest is trying to cave in on me. I feel like I'm about to explode." She looked to Deb for answers. "I want to get up, I can't just lay here. I have to get back to Angel, make sure he's OK then get back to my post. I can't let the ship down again." "Angel is right here," assured Debbie softly, resting a hand on Kat's trembling shoulder. She glanced at the man now standing over Schawnsee. "I don't think he's been more than a few feet away the entire time you were asleep" She waited a moment while Angel gently stroked his wife's hair while whispering quietly in her ear. "It's time you stopped worrying about the ship," continued Deb, deciding they had better get to the point. Reaent would be docking at the starbase in less than 30 minutes. There was a lot to discuss before then. "As a matter of fact, you must stop thinking about the ship and put yourself ahead of everyone and everything else." Debbie glanced at Caroline seeking encouragement as she continued. "You need a break, Kat. We've made arrangements to transfer you to the Michelson Institute on Earth so you can regroup. I don't think it will take all that long but this is necessary for both your mental and physical health." Kat looked around seeing Angel at her side. She sighed a heavy sigh f relief to see he was indeed OK. "I don't want to leave the ship. I can't leave my post. Most of all I can't leave Angel. Michelson Institute is so far away and the Reaent is going in the oppisite direction. Please don't make me leave? Please?" she looks from one of the folks by her side to the other ending with Angel. "Please don't make me leave. I don't know anyone there. I'll be all alone." Tears start falling from her eyes and down her cheek once again. "Kat..." Caroline said slowly, watching Schawnsee and her husband and taking a step or two back slightly. Turning her head sideways, she nodded a reassuring smile at Deb's questioning look and took over her side of the conversation. "I know how you feel, but trust me, we are asking you to do nothing permanent, nothing that will hurt you. It is because we know how much you value your position on board this ship that we want you to do this. You...melted down a little bit this morning, and frankly, I don't blame you in the slightest. It's been a rough few weeks for everyone. But it will pass, it will. This...fear, what you're feeling right now...it will pass." She could see tears seeping out at the corner of Kat's eyes and her heart twisted slightly but she pressed on. "And when it does...I don't want you to realize that you've burned any bridges. I want you to be able to come back here and know that your position here is as solid as it ever was. Does that make sense?" She kept her voice light, comforting, not letting any of the tension she felt at knowing how important this conversation was seep through. "We want to give you a rest, that's all. You will never be all alone." Kat looked between the three of them, Angel being the last. She was waiting for him to confirm what was being told to her It wasn't that she didn't believe the doctors, but it was him that she was worried most about. It was what he thought that mattered most to her, at least at this time. She focused her eyes on his face and reached up for him. With the same tears in her voice that crawling down her cheek she softly spoke. "Arch do.... well,... do I have to... have to go?" Angel smiled and leaned over taking her into his arms lovingly, softly...resting her small face into his neck. Angel could feel the tension in her as her tears flowed from her. Angel turned his head and spoke quietly into her ear letting Schawnsee know the information was valid and accurate from both the doctors. Looking back into her eyes, Angel reassured her she would never be alone...and arrangements for "family" to be close by were already underway. "I will be just fine, little one"...Angel knew she could feel his thoughts and knew any kind of hidden fears or concerns Schawnsee would know instantly as well....He made certain all she could read was his genuine love and concern over her. " You must go now, for just a short time my love, I have been assured you will return to me...just remember and keep in mind our ways, and my love". Debbie had taken a step back to allow Kat and Angel what little privacy they could have in such a public setting. The ship's comm announced their arrival at the starbase. An escort had been arranged for Schawnsee. He would be waiting for her when she beamed over to the starbase. It was his responsibility to guide Kat to the transport and accompany her to the Institute on Earth. Everything was ready. And now, it was time for security chief to go.

Many thanks to that small band of renegades who had the foresight to create STSF! Congratulations on 8 continuous years of fun! Let's hope we're around in another 8 years!

Debbie was sitting on the edge of the couch when Aidan walked in, her hands clasped so tightly her knuckles had gone white. A plethora of emotions bombarded her, all of them negative. She doubted it was possible for her to feel any worse than she already did. He frowns darkly the second he spots Deb. By her body language alone he can tell how closed off she is. It’s exactly like when she thought he died. If anything his frown darkens at that thought. He steps towards her, not quite sure what to expect. "I just declared Kat Schawnsee unfit for duty," quipped Deb, her voice clearly betraying her frustration. "What's worse, I've ordered her to a psychiatric rehabilitation facility. She'll be leaving the ship when we dock at the starbase." Standing up, she walked around the coffee table in front of the sofa. Aidan moved toward her but she held up a hand warning him not to come closer. "And you know why this happened?" she asked cryptically. "Fear, that's why. Fear of losing the one she loves most in the universe. This last mission pushed her over the edge and she could no longer deal with the fear. It literally swallowed her alive." Deb looked down at the floor and shook her head. "We both know that same fear," she continued plaintively, fighting to keep back the tears.. "And sooner or later, I'm afraid there will be a mission that pushes one of us over the edge. I'm afraid of that fear overwhelming us. Worse yet, I'm terrified that fear will be laced with grief because you'll be gone." He sighs and murmurs "If anyone is to blame it is me for assigning her this mission. Perhaps I should have recognized she wasn’t ready for it. Though..on the flip side I hardly had any idea that the station would be quite the...problem it turned out to be." "You're not to blame for this, " whispered Debbie. "No one is to blame though I must admit, I'm looking for someone to pin it on. You had every right to include her on the away team. She's been through far worse than this last mission." He steps towards her but stops a half step away. He brings a hand up to brush her tears away but he doesn’t try and embrace her, not yet. "I can’t say the possibility doesn’t exist. We both knew this was a dangerous job when we joined Starfleet and we both knew it would stay dangerous even after we got married. But I also recognize that if we hadn’t joined Starfleet we would never have met much less fallen in love. And becoming involved with you, marrying you is not something I regret. It...you are the best thing in my life, Deb. Nothing changes that." "She's my friend, Aidan," groaned Debbie. "I know her well. Of all the people on this ship, Kat is the last person I expected to fall apart like this." She turned around and took a step further away from her husband. "I keep thinking I should have seen it coming. She was distressed at the briefing following the mission. But she talked to Dr. Curtis after that and she seemed to calm down." Whirling around, she again faced Aidan. "Is this what we have to look forward to?" He steps towards her and rests his hands gently at her waist. "Well I’ll point out something before you start blaming yourself for not noticing. I seem to recall right after that meeting..or rather right after we got out of Sickbay and heard that we were heading to the Starbase you and I started concentrating more or less completely on each other. Speaking for myself I wasn’t exactly thinking of anyone beyond the two of us and the cat during that time. Furthermore we both had our own and each others recovery from what happened to put us in Sickbay to deal with." He shrugs slightly "Sometimes its harder to notice something then it seems it should be in hindsight." "As for if that's what we have to look forward to I can’t answer that. I hope not but I am not going to pretend I can predict the future. All I can do is do my best to protect the two of us. And my best to make sure that we don’t go through what she is apparently going through. And I think that’s all you can do as well, sweetheart." He cants his head to the side and asks "Are you saying you want to leave?" She hadn't quite expected him to ask that question but it was at the root of the problem. Leaving was the only way to insure neither of them had to deal with the type of issues now facing Kat and Angel. Smiling ruefully, Deb shrugged her shoulders, her eyes misting to the point she could barely see. "I know I want to leave. I just don't know exactly when," she stammered. "But I'm certain I want out before either of us is eaten alive by the sheer uncertainty of this lifestyle." He steps into her and holds her tightly against him. He tucks his head against hers and murmurs "I want out of here as well. I don’t want to stay here the rest of my life, I want to go back to Earth...home with you and see about the next stage of our life. To spend as much time with you as possible, to not have to worry about red alerts or various departments in Starfleet or any of that nonsense." He tips his head back and looks into her eyes before saying quietly "I’m just not sure when yet. I just know I want that sooner then I wanted it three years ago." They stood in the middle of the room, silently clinging to each other, for two or three minutes. "I think I want it sooner than later as well," mumbled Debbie. She pulled away far enough to look up into Aidan's stunning green eyes. "But, like you, I'm not sure how soon that is." "Perhaps at some point we should start figuring out how soon. But while we remain here all I can do is have faith that we will make it through and do everything in my power to ensure that happens. My future lies with you, not with Starfleet." He kisses her forehead and tightens his arms around her. "But for tonight, if I can play Doctor and make a prescription, we should see to supper and then lets go to bed. I don’t know about you but I could use some holding." He shrugs and adds "Or I’m open to suggestions." She had no objections. At the moment, all she wanted to do was forget about what was going on outside of her quarters. Tomorrow, they would dock at the station. There would be new personnel arriving and transfers leaving for their new assignments. Among them would be the Reaent's security chief. Debbie would be there to bid farewell to her friend. It wouldn't be easy so she needed tonight to prepare and Aidan's prescription sounded like the perfect cure for what ailed her. "Dinner and bed sounds fine to me," she finally replied. "We might even talk about the future a little. Considering the circumstances, this might be the perfect time to start figuring out how much longer we're going to stay." He nods, "Yes, I think so. And as for tomorrow, if no objection, I’ll be there." He lets go of her but then reaches for her hand and guides her gently towards the table. He quickly decides what to have for supper, intending to make it something simple and easy. If only just to get to the second part of the plan.

Brought to you by: Debbie Matthews, Caroline Curtis & Kat Schawnsee They were in the CMO's office, behind closed doors. Neither of them spoke. Debbie leaned against the side of her desk, her arms tightly folded in front of her, a frown etched on her face. Caroline Curtis, the ship's counselor, paced the floor in front of the desk just as disturbed as Deb about their new patient. The problem they faced was one neither of them ever expected. It wasn't that uncommon for a member of the crew to crack a little under pressure. But Kat Schawnsee? Never! Yet that was precisely what they were dealing with. And this wasn't a panic attack or a minor bout of insecurity. The Reaent's Chief Security Officer appeared to have suffered a full blown breakdown. Deb certainly hadn't seen it coming. She'd know Kat for years. She'd lost count of all the near misses they'd been through together. Schawnsee was always uncommonly poised in the face of danger. It was one of the attributes Debbie admired most about the security chief. But Kat's life had changed during the past two or three years. That change was something Debbie was keenly aware of as her own life had taken a similar turn. Both women had fallen in love and married. But along with the new found joy and security there came a very real element of fear....a fear the CMO dealt with on a daily basis....a feat that had finally overwhelmed Kat Schawnsee. She couldn't get over the irony....she and Aidan were discussing their own futures....debating about whether or not to take the next step in their lives. That conversation was interrupted by Angel's frantic call for help. Debbie was still reeling from the sight of her long time friend when she was brought into Sickbay. Kat was clearly unglued. She had fallen to pieces and Deb feared it would take both time and serious effort to put those pieces back together again. Is this what she had to look forward to? Would another crisis arise that would send Deb over the edge? Squeezing her eyes shut, the CMO forced herself to remain calm and focused. She and Caroline had to develop a recovery protocol for Kat and they had very little time. The ship was due to arrive at the starbase within 24 hours. They had to decide if Kat Schawnsee would remain aboard or if she would be transferred to another facility for therapy. "What do you think, Caroline?" asked Debbie, turning to face the still pacing counselor. "Is this something you can handle or does she need more intensive treatment than we can provide?" "I think..." Caroline said slowly, her eyes turned towards the floor in thought, "that she has been very severely frightened. All of this crew has, in one way or another, within the past few months; some have dealt with it better than others..." She paused, then turned, facing Deb with her arms crossed. It was hard, surprisingly hard, really, not to feel defensive right now. She had helped Kat, at the time of the incident that was the tacitly acknowledged root cause of this relapse. She had helped her, had eventually declared her fit to move on -- the woman had showed progress, which was all that could be expected of anyone after such an experience. And Caroline had thought that was enough. For most of the crew it had been, but Kat had at the time been one of the most affected and there was a niggling voice at the back of Caroline's mind that said she should have done more. But there was no way she could have known that. She knew it now, but hindsight was 20/20. The future she could only guess at like everyone else. Everything beyond that she stuffed into a quiet corner of her thoughts to deal with later and forced herself to speak as analytically as possible. "Kat suffered a great deal over the...loss and subsequent return of her husband. In retrospect, perhaps she returned to duty before she was ready for that step -- and recent events have certainly given her little time for reflection. The problem...I would venture to say she has allowed it to prey on her enough to perhaps cause more deep-seated anxieties than she has suffered from before..." She realized that, overcompensating, she sounded almost mechanical, and let her voice soften a little bit, leaning back against the wall of Deb's office. "Ideally, I would say she needs rest -- real rest, away from her duties, away from the stresses of shipboard life, and with an honest, dedicated diagnosis and treatment regimen by a stationary medical team. Even more ideally I'd like her husband to be able to go with her, but I know that's probably not practical..." She paused again, then rubbed a hand down her face tiredly. Looking at Deb, she could see the concern and tension on the other woman's face, and she smiled as reassuringly as she could. "I'm sorry you've been faced with this, Deb...I know you're worried about her," she said gently. "I had hoped I had averted some of the potential for reactions like this at the time...unfortunately the brain is as unpredictable an organ as the heart..." "This isn't your fault," replied Deb softly as she met the counselor's gaze. "You did the best you could. I know I didn't see this coming." The CMO walked around to the front of her desk then again turned toward Caroline. "I realize she was very upset after this last mission. But then she seemed to calm down. I thought she was okay." She smiled ruefully while shaking her head. "But she's not okay....not by a long shot and we don't have the resources to help her." It stuck in her craw to admit it but Caroline was right. Schawnsee needed a definitive diagnoses followed by an extended treatment protocol. And she needed to be somewhere other than Reaent....someplace quiet and stress free....like a stationary medical facility. And the chances of Angel being allowed to join her were slim and none. Those were the facts and there was no denying them but it still irritated Deb. Her irritation went beyond what she should have felt regardless of her friendship with the patient. But that was another issue she would have to deal with privately before it overwhelmed her as it did Kat. "Do you have a facility in mind?" asked Deb, resigning herself to the inevitable. "We'll be docking pretty soon. I'd like to have the arrangements finalized in time to discuss them with Kat and Angel. We'll inquire about him accompanying her but I wouldn't hold my breath, if I were you." Caroline nodded slowly, appreciating Deb's reassurance (commiseration, really) but now preoccupied by the details. "I can make some calls; our current destination is a decent waypoint facility and their staff psychologist, Davenport, is a good one, and they'll be able to arrange her transfer further inland, so to speak, if it seems necessary. The question, I suppose, is whether she'll be willing to go -- and whether we have any other options if she isn't. Clearly our current circumstances are reopening old wounds, perhaps on a regular basis." She ran a hand down her face and turned her eyes towards the door. "I will speak with her when she wakes up...do you want to be involved in that conversation or shall I take care of it?" "I'd like to be there, if you don't mind," replied Deb. "I own her that much. But there is something she must understand. She really doesn't have a choice." The CMO slumped into one of the chairs facing her desk and studied the ceiling of the small office. "Right now, she's a danger to herself and the crew and her condition isn't going to improve unless she's treated at a certified psychiatric facility.'" Debbie glanced over her shoulder at Caroline, her expression one of deep regret. "She can't stay on the ship. She isn't fit for duty. She has to go whether she wants to or not." Caroline nodded, glad to see that Deb shared conviction on the subject. If the discussion to convince the CMO had been as difficult as it might prove to be with the patient, this could have been a very long afternoon indeed. Longer than it already would be, anyway... "She does..." she said quietly, nodding agreement. "I just wish I knew of a way to make this easy." Laying a hand lightly on Deb's shoulder, she gestured towards the door. "I suppose we might as well do it sooner than later." Tapping the door control, she looked out into the main bay. Kat began to wake up. She slowly opens her eyes and starts to look around. The sedative that had been given to her was quite strong. She was able to move her head but its lasting effects on her body didn't allow her to sit up just yet. She looked around as if looking for someone but not finding them. Her muscles began to quiver in expectation of getting up and getting out, before being seen. The CMO was a couple of steps behind Dr. Curtis as the two women walked across the main ward toward Kat. Things were quiet but she doubted they would be for long. As they approached Commander Schawnsee, Debbie could tell the security chief had awakened. She stepped up her pace a bit until she stood bedside Caroline. "She's awake," whispered Deb. "I'll call Angel so we can get this over with as soon as possible." Caroline nodded sidelong at her and then took up a position next to Kat's bed, catching the CSEC's eyes as they flashed around the room. "Morning, Kat..." she said, keeping her tone light and waiting for the other woman to acknowledge her.